To think my daughter is taking me for a mug?

[WhatstheT]

I could post this in parenting... but I'd barely get a reply.

I'm really struggling with my daughter and her not being independent around me.

I work full time and my daughter has been in nursery since 9 months old. She's at nursery 8am til 1pm then my partner picks her up. Since the day she started nursery she has refused a bottle and milk, she would only have water in a sippy cup. At around the same time I started offering her a sippy cup at home with meals, and she wouldn't touch them. She's now 1 years old and I've persisted with this to no avail. We have about 8 different types of cup. She spent one week at about 11 months old proudly sipping water from them at mealtimes, but then stopped again. She just picks them up and throws them, or tips them upside down and pours all the water or milk out.

On saturday she had a morning bottle, then at 10am she wanted a drink again, so I put some milk in one sippy cup, water in another, offered both to a massive shake of the head. I left it until 3pm with constant crying and whinging for a drink. Everytime she asked I placed the sippy cup infront of her, and that would make her worse. I also put a sippy cup in her pram on the table at the front when we go out. Eventually at teatime I ended up having to give her a bottle before bed, she was screaming to the point of gagging. She also won't have a bottle with large or variflow teats now... only slow flowing number ones.... I just don't get it.

I've spoken to nursery about it and she takes a sippy cup without a fuss, picks it up and drinks it. (we have the same one as nursery too)

I know persistence is the way forward, but she will go all day not touching any liquid until I put it in a bottle. I also don't understand her one week of using any sippy cup I gave her and just giving up.

She is the same with feeding too. Feeds herself with a spoon at nursery, but at home I have to put the food on a spoon and pass it to her (or she hand feeds if it isn't a runny food) If I put the spoon in the bowl and leave it for her, she screams and throws it on the floor.

I know she's playing with me, because I know all the things I'm encouraging she can do!. It's becoming daft that she can't drink at home without leaning back or lying down with her bottle (I won't cradle her with one anymore) I'm stuck for what to do! There's plenty of other things she only does with me too (screaming when I open a door or looking like I'm leaving, cries when I enter a room, I'm her personal climbing frame...etc. all separation stuff)

Lol, my dd was exactly the same op. She's 18 now, you should see her neck a bottle of Bud. Just relax, it'll all work itself out.

Would she entertain having a different bottle or is it that type she is fixated on?

I ask because the bottle is quite small which might be why she's struggling to tip it back. There's a type of bottle that's shaped like a runner''s bottle with a teat. I'll see if I can find a link. I'm not sure what it's called. Hang on...

I honestly just expected some con structure hints and tips. I'm not worried or anything :) all is well and chilled here :) sippy cups are back in the cupboard amd hidden for a week. Currently using me as a pillow while being hypnotised by the night garden. (Iggle piggleis creepy)

Roundtable - That's just a random small one we have that my other half filled with water for her. Usually it's the bigger tommee tippee ones she has. She has a couple of large avent ones too but the situation is no difderent They were just left over from when I was expressing.

This Tommy Tippee one. It comes in a variety of colours. A friend of mine uses it with her toddler as she can hold it herself.

Cross post with you. Sorry op.

I think you have a determined little one who knows her own mind already! I think you're right to just go with it.

Good luck op

Oooh I've never seen one of those before. May need to add it to he collection :)

Mine much preferred soft silicone teats - you can get sippy cups which have these - maybe would provide an easier transition for her

www.nuk.co.uk/product/disney-by-nuk-winnie-the-pooh-active-cup-300ml/

NUK - do other cups with silicone sippy teats too.

It does say for children 12mnths+ on them so your DD is just fine for her age to still want a bottle sometimes - honestly I'd let her have her bottle at home if it were me - pick your battles, this one wouldn't be a biggy for me

I haven't exactly read the full thread, but lots of it!

I was going to say, just let her have the bottle. The disadvantages in terms of tooth decay are going to be less if she is only having it some of the time and uses a sippy cup at nursery.

As long as you don't put ribena in it (!) and you are brushing her teeth I'm sure it will be fine.

She obviously sees you as the person she can be a baby around (in a subconscious way, obviously) which is nice.

Iggle piggle freaks me out i saw him/her on tv plugging his/her show it was 6 foot

Yep no ribena or any juice. Just milk and water!

I'm really struggling with my daughter and her not being independent around me.

Its not a choice between a cup or a bottle, as others have said that are other gadgets available.
She's getting comfort from the bottle. So let her have it, even if she struggles with it.

I think we're probably past misquoting what I meant now :)

I'm sorry, I know this isn't helpful but she looks so cute holding the bottle herself! I love how sweet they look using their little hands on big things.

Also, all those posters who were saying you were depriving her of liquids for hours clearly hadn't read your posts properly - giving her water or milk in a sippy cup that she knows perfectly well how to use but chooses not to isn't depriving her of liquids!

Haha thanks starling. That's a tiny bottle too. One of the 5oz ones you get with the breast pump kits. The bigger bottles dwarf her :)

And thanks. I'd never deprive her of anything. It's not something I'd have done if I knew she didn't understand what the cups were for.

I knew someone who didn't know that the valves in sippy cups need to be taken apart for cleaning. Her DC refused to drink and eventually she tried the cup herself and it was foul.

I'm almost certain that isn't the problem you have, but thought it was worth sharing, just in case.

Thepebblecollecter I replied on the first page. The reason I said let her have a bottle was because she sounds like an independent girl, and ds2 was an independent boy. Actually he still is! Quite honestly I picked my battles. The bottle wasn't one I wanted to fight over, clothes was! I hope you don't think I was judging you. I found with ds2 the more I pushed the more stubborn he became. I had to record one of his paddies because pre-school didn't believe me. He was amazing out, so different to home. He also used to sit up and be angry that his bottle wasn't working and from an early age held his own bottle. I was in a rush this morning.
Put in chat for traffic. Aibu is always a bun fight. It's obvious that a mum asking for advice on when to start with a cup isn't neglectful or feeling less!

I cba to RTFT, but try a cup with a straw. It worked wonders for my DS at that age when he wouldn't drink from a cup.

She only has a valve in one sippy cup and she's never even tried that one. She wouldn't even entertain them til I took the valves out to make them free flow :)

This sort of thing.

Have you tried a beaker with a pop up straw thingy or sports cup? My boys would use a straw out and about but preferred a sports bottle when at home.
just an idea.

Yeah I've got one with a pop up rubber straw and one with a solid straw. Used them and shared with her, She just looks at me like "wtf do I do with this" haha

Does it matter?

Helpful.