to want my kitchen appliances to be less needy?

[LemonShizzleCake]

They're all at it.

The dishwasher beeps about 8 times when it's finished. Then 10 minutes later, if you haven't opened it, it does it again. And so on, apparently forever. Loud enough to hear throughout the entire house.

The microwave is only mildly needy - if you don't open it when it's finished, it waits 30 seconds or so and then squawks at you again, as if you might have forgotten your baked beans chocolate mug cake steamed veggies.

But the piece de resistance is the washing machine, which plays a ridiculously long TUNE at the end of the cycle and I can't find how to turn the sodding thing off. Drives me and DH to distraction.

Anyone else's kitchen appliances need therapy?

Major issue in this house too. Microwave needs to go 'ding' once... not beep, beep, beep, beep etc.

Dishwasher, washer, drier etc... just flash a bit of a light... that'll do.

Worst of all is our doorbell though... When I press the key to lock or unlock my car, the doorbell chimes up with random nursery rhymes or Old Suzanna etc.

My washing machine plays a tune too. I think it's because it's happy in it's work.

happy in its work Fatmomma I hadn't thought of it like that.

Also that doorbell sounds bloody awful. Ours is pretty pants now I come to think of it - periodically decides it's just not going to work, so parcels get undelivered even when we're home, or visitors stand out in the rain for ages. Then you go and test it and it's fine.

Contrary little shit.

Lemon are you me? Do I have a split personality?

Mine are just patronizing. My microwave smugly tells me to 'enjoy my food' and my fridge beeps at me like an annoying mother in law if I leave the door open.

My mum's washing machine sings a tune. One of my sisters and I made up words so we can sing along. We're aged 29 and 31

I'm sure my washing machine is very happy to be so utilised!

I want to punch my microwave, though. That is a discontent machine!

We have an inbuilt coffee machine in our house which is unbelievably demanding. Every other minute it's all 'empty trays', 'more beans', 'add water', 'clean me'. Urgh.

My rice cooker plays a ridonculous tune too. Better than the water boiler that ignores me when it's empty. letting me guess when it's going to burn my house down.

My fucking cooker.

does this thread come under the category of "first world problem"?

All of my appliances, apart from the dishwasher (which is only 11) are 20+ years old and the only one that makes a noise when completed is the microwave. It emits 5 beeps and then that's it, no reminders.
I sometimes wish it would remind me when I have forgotten that I have left my mug of coffee in there (that would be the same mug of coffee that I had forgotten to drink earlier and decided to reheat in the microwave).

PaulAnka I have no knowledge of being you...are you me? [mysterious emoticon]

Oooh ooh BeeRose is it a samsung one!? If so please tell me the words, this will help brighten my days immeasurably.

Glad it's not just me, though I appreciate it is probably a first world problem. Still, I feel it could eventually tip me over the edge in manner of water torture or similar.

This shit could get creepy...

You think they are needy now. I am dreading the internet of things and the days when your fridge can email you to tell you you are out of booze milk. The microwave will be texting you to say you left your coffee.

I'm desperatley avoiding all energy co letters trying to tempt me with a smart meter. I don't trust anything that thinks for itself.

I have trained DD1 to turn off the beeping oven. Wherever she is in the house she will come running to press the button to shut it up. Probably my best parenting achievement tbh.

We bought Bosch.... Dishwasher, washing machine and condensing dryer. The beeps are hell! Add to that DS who is fed by a pump... That screams at you when finished or if he's sat on the tube. I spend my life running after beeping appliances!
I have DS1 and DD in training for the beep marathon ... They need work but I am the gold medalists!

My washing machine is very needy. It does about 10 beeps when it finishes and then repeats about 4 times.

I always try to stop my microwave before it gets to 0 as the beeps drive me nuts. I'm

Lemon you must have exactly the same appliances as me, mine all do the same thing.

The microwave is particularly annoying because it won't stop shouting at me until I've opened it.

I was so pissed off with all the beeps, pings and tunes in my kitchen that I bought a quiet boil kettle to try and save some sanity. The bastard only fucking pings once it has finished. Bastard kettle.

My washing machine beeps a merry little tune when it's finished, it's very happy in its work! I could turn it off, but I like it!
The dishwasher beeps 4 or 5 times when it's done, then sits happily silent till you open the door and it beeps again! No idea why, but I have worked out if I turn it off before I open it, it can't beep!
The microwave, however, I could happily cook metal in! Very loud, piercing, electronic noise three times and again and again and again! I don't know how many reminders it will give as, like trixy , I try to turn it off before 0.

My kitchen sounds the same as yours, right down to the cheerful washing machine, though I can tell you how to mute it if you have an ecobubble if that's any use OP? First thing I worked out when I turned it on.

I bought a tumble dryer before Christmas and it also shouts at me

I'm with 80sMum. My appliances are so old only the microwave makes a noise and it's only a quick beep. I am slightly worried at the noise the (equally old) central heating makes as I'm sure it's supposed to run quietly.

My fridge. It can only be open for a minute, until it has a handy beep, beep, beep, beep until you shut the door again.
This is handy for if you don't shut it properly - absolute torture for putting away the shopping!