confusion over race terms

[Musicmay]

So white people get accused of being racist if they call black people "coloured" including the older generations who mean no harm and white people are absolutly racist if they even think about saying anything about a race as a group... I give you Kanye west. Any thoughts on this?

SmallBee thank you for the questions. I thought it would be good, having already established the OP was being ridiculous, if the discussion could move forward (again without dismissing what most people had already agreed on). 'How can I help make change?'.

I wouldn't accept anyone tell me how racism affects me. Why would I tell anyone that they don't know how privileged they are? The white people I know already accept and acknowledge it. My line manager (white female) pointed out the inherent racism in our work place. You know, the old 'they all look the same crap'. Been there nearly two years but still get called by the one other black girls name. My manager is embarrassed, she's the one that said it's because you are black but I already knew that, I just let it roll over me. We laugh at it (but monitor and HR have noted it) but she makes sure I'm everywhere, including senior management meetings. I don't feel any malice. I feel embarrassed for them.

The problem with forum debates is that it's very difficult to get view point across in one post. It can get heated very quickly with people making snap judgements or just being curt. The obvious trolls don't help but it's a shame when we lambast each other because guards are up.

SmallBee who taught you or were you just self aware? My mum has white and Indian grandparents, I didn't get the 'privileged' skin tone even my hair is not acceptable to some black people. Would be considered dirty, but long hair don't care! I think your children will be fine with a role model like you.

SmallBee Similarly to you, I am also mixed but where we differ is that I clearly look mixed whereas you say that you can pass for white. My sister also does appear to be white and the only way someone would know that she wasn't is if she used her middle names which are clearly African.

I agree that making comparisons with the US isn't helpful as it does not address the immediate concerns of a black British individual. It'd be a bit like saying 'Well we're not perfect, but look at how bad they are! Be grateful!'.

To respond to your last point, I don't personally think it's some sort of daily battle iyswim. If I were to wake up everyday and feel anxiety about how my day will go just because I'm black I don't think I'd leave my house because it'd just induce so much anxiety.

My main concern is how people acknowledge it or not. I don't think that you should "improve" yourself or "teach your children to be better" to a greater extent than you already would iyswim. To that end, I mean presumably you teach your children to have respect for others and to not discriminate against others for obvious appearances of 'difference'. That is good enough in my book because in my honest opinion I don't think it's helpful for people to tip-toe around black people for fear of being offensive or anything else. Because if that attitude were to prevail then black people will always be seen as 'other' and like you said I'd also like to get to a point where there's nothing left to do.

I don't think we'll reach that point in my lifetime, nor that of my dcs or even their dcs but Rome wasn't built in a day .

Peyia Your post has just reminded me of that frequently trotted out trope: 'they all look the same' . I read an article about a black feminist who experienced something similar - in her case it wasn't about being called the same name as another black person but being told by her colleague that he wouldn't bother trying to correctly pronounce her name because according to him all those "hood black girl names" all sound the same. Her riposte was just brilliant imo because she did so with a measure of calm, good-humour and criticism. Here's the link: indy100.independent.co.uk/article/the-internet-has-fallen-in-love-with-this-nsfw-story-about-ignorance-microaggression-and-sweet-sweet-comeuppance--bJxCOBOXpje - if you can get over the Independent's obsession with clickbait-headlines and hyperbolic language then this article makes for a very funny read.

I really think when talking about these sort of issues it's important to keep a sense of humour. One of my earliest managers was a black woman who would poke fun at the apparent racism she faced. She never came across as bitter or having a chip on her shoulder. She taught me a lot.

Anyway, I really should get of this thread as it seems I've become a little bit taken in by it.

Ah Fudge that link cracked me up. Hi John, Peter, Brad....what's your name?

I'm glad you laugh too at it all too

I'm also too invested. Forgot to hide the thread!

In the UK in 2012 a black person would get 19% more prison time than a white person for THE SAME CRIME.
I didn't know that. It's appalling.

just read US stats re killings by police men =1,134 young black men shot to death by US police in 2015. Also ybm are 9 times more likely to be killed by US police than other US males. Prisons are the new slave system in US. The inmates work for virtually nothing and are contracted out to private businesses by the prison authority, which is increasingly privatised also.

I was once asked to sing at an office party- to which I wondered why I was chosen?
Answer- ''well, you all can sing- like Aretha Franklin''- Jeesus!