To ask guests to contribute to my wedding?

[DontForgetTheLightAlesLawrence]

Please give your honest thoughts on what you would think to receiving this in a wedding invitation.

Along with saying yes or no to coming, and whether you have any special dietary requirements, it has a bit saying that all drinks on the day/evening will be free, with a small contribution request, on the return of the invitation. Childrend drinks are free so no contribution required: non alcohol drinking adults £5, alcohol drinking adults £10.

You can't ask for an entrance fee. But you could make the whole thing - food and drink - BYO. I have been to a wedding like this: everyone brought a picnic and it was great.

I would rather bring a tenner than ten £1 coins

Having the float to sort out all those notes is going to be a pain so I guess if people can buy ten tokens with their note it would be easier- and then they can sell any extras back at the end!!

Cheers brian

Wahey!

That's true! Tokens instead of cash. I like that. Thank you snowman

shiney food is all covered by us, and drinks with the food.

you could even give a couple of tokens as the favour! I'd rather that than some arty thing or sugared nuts I'm not going to use/keep!

Ah, it's in a barn with no bar. Well, if you can't afford to stock the party properly with booze you should invite fewer people BYOB is clearly the solution. £10 a head just looks awful.

OP, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being unable to pay for everyone's drink all night but still wanting them at your wedding. I just think the entrance fee idea is totally impractical:

• what are you going to do if people don't pay? Refuse them entrance?
• what will you do if the people who have paid a fiver start helping themselves to booze?

- most of the drinkers will drink far more than £10 worth, so you'll end up spending much more than if you had a cash bar.

Bad plan.

YABU to ask for payment. A wedding reception is about showing hospitality to the guests who've taken the time and expense to attend your wedding, give a gift, buy a new outfit, travelled, paid for accommodation etc.

A paid bar would be fine though.

Ok. The entrance fee (your words not mine 😂) is gone. That's a no no then.

But the cheap drinks I do believe is practical. But a load of drink tokens at the beginning. £1 a token. Soft drinks are free anyway so it's only for booze. Give the barman your token for a drink. At the end of the night if there's booze left take a bottle home, if there's not, give your unused tokens back and get the cash back if you really want! Winner. Job done.

^ *buy

Charging for anything at a wedding is the lowest of the low. That includes pay bars. And cash contributions instead of presents.

You're asking people to spend money on an outfits, travel and presents and then you're asking them to pay for their own beverages on top. Fuck that.

If you can't afford to provide food and drink free for everyone then have a smaller wedding.

The tokens sound like a much better idea

Charging for anything at a wedding is the lowest of the low. That includes pay bars. And cash contributions instead of presents.

The lowest of the low? Really? Below all those benefits cheats, wife beaters, paedophiles and murderers we've got people who have a paid bar at their wedding?

Ridiculous.

twinkle do you mean it's rude for guests to pay ANYTHING on the day? As in, at your wedding you had a bar and just picked up the full tab at the end? That's not that common though. I've mostly paid for y own drinks at weddings.

Gosh, this thread is an eye opener. I've never been to a wedding with a cash bar. We've never done it my family, as we have the wedding parties in one or other family house (close or extended), and just ho to France to get it. Skint friends with the village hall/barn set up just go to a cash and carry or Aldi or Lidl or a trip to France, and buy wine and beer and when it's gone, it's gone. It's a wedding, not a binge drinking event.

I still don't quite understand the tokens.
You buy a token then use it to buy a drink?
Won't that give you 2 things to staff? Where does the change come from - the tokens stall?

FGS just tell everyone to bring a bottle for the party! It can't possibly be naffer than drinks tokens.

I disagree if that's what you do mean. I'd love to pay for everything, but I can't. And as lots of people in this thread have agreed, most people expect to pay for their own drinks on the day.

Agree with Twinklestein You're planning a party you can't actually afford.

My son is invited to a wedding in April where everyone apart from the bridal party have to pay $90 to go (even the family) needless to say no-one has paid yet and the wedding is in a couple of months - am watching how it goes with interest ...

YABU to ask for payment. A wedding reception is about showing hospitality to the guests who've taken the time and expense to attend your wedding, give a gift, buy a new outfit, travelled, paid for accommodation etc.

A paid bar would be fine though.*

This