To have a word with the school about birthday treats?

[BananaPie]

Ds is in reception. On their birthday, kids are allowed to bring in treats to dish out to classmates at the end of the day. The other day, ds came out with a piece of cake, a chocolate biscuit and a lolly.

Now, I'm more than happy for ds to have the odd treat, but I do like to choose what and when he has them. That said, it does seem pretty churlish to whip them away when all his classmates are tucking in, and I couldn't quite face the resulting tantrum on the way home. Ds ate them all, but was on a sugar high for the rest of the evening which made bedtime a bit of a nightmare.

Would it be unreasonable to talk to the school about types / amounts of treats allowed? Some people just bring in a box of celebrations or similar and each child takes one, which I have no problem with. Or should I just confiscate as much as possible from him in the playground and deal with the tantrum?

i bet the dont like the cake,sweet etc brigade are the one's that think primary age children should have more homework to

Let them eat kale...

Jesus Christ. Some of you sound like a bunch of miserable sods. A piece of cake or a lolly once or twice a week isn't going to make your child obese or give them diabetes. Denying them these fun treats which are a normal part of childhood will cause issues with food later on. Who the fuck cares if a child eats a mini bag of Haribo (there's like 5 fucking sweets in the bag!). Get a grip and pick your battles.

The sweets/cakes/whatever are a red herring.

The OP's issue is that she has to make a choice between compromising her principles and a tantrum.

Take the tantrum. Every time.

That's your job as a parent.

Normally the kids in my DS1 class eat the cake there and then, then bring the other stuff home. My DS knows it's usually kept for after dinner.

There was a poster a while back saying that homemade cake goes straight in the bin. Why? I prefer home made cake as it has a lot less chemical crap in it than shop bought or haribo. Is there some reason I'm not getting?

Please chill. If you ruin birthdays for the class, then you ABU.

Meh! It's not something I ever fussed about.

It's 30 times a year at most. Usually less as not everyone partakes in the whole bringing something in and there are several children with holiday birthdays who don't either. And most of the time it's a mini chocolate or a small mini bag of Haribo type thing. Not a huge bag or full size chocolate bar. Occasionally you might get a bun.

If worried you just cut back on other treats that week instead surely?

And no to raisins - most dentists would prefer a child to have a bar of chocolate than a packet of raisins. They're a nightmare for teeth!

And which children really truly want a piece of fruit over a bar of chocolate or some sweeties!?!

I just wish they wouldn't do it. I. Don't want to have to make 30 cupcakes or what have every year for DS to share. I'll make them for his party and we have a tradition of cake for breakfast on birthdays so I'm happy for cakes and stuff. It's just the added making or buying or guilt for not doing it.

I'm in my mid 30s and do not remember a single birthday cake/lollies/cupcake at school. I do remember singing happy birthday which seams fun and ok

seasidesally. I think primary kids should have no homework! Play, running, climbing dangerous trees, heck a little baking for maths and physics and chemistry, reading, music (sing and dance to the radio) and a bit of telly. But homework no.

Ds takes cake into school on his birthday. His sn means he would hate a party so this is his is way of marking his birthday

I have no issues with any of it, the sweets or the dealing with of a tantrum ironically I am happy to let my son have whatever really but he has no interest in sweets at all limited interest in chocolate and again no interest in cake of any sort. He almost looked at everyone with disgust as they tried to force a packet of sweets on him on their birthdays

One school I worked at had a no sweets/chocolate policy, I think before I had started working there, there had been massive teeth issues in the area/school and there were all sorts of things in place. They allowed children to bring in packets of crisps to give out on birthdays. Never come across that before or since!

Last year my dd's teacher had no issue no matter what was sent in, I sent in cake.

This year we have been told by her new teacher that no food items are allowed, stickers or bubbles etc were suggested.

Can't understand why they don't have the same policy throughout the school, it should b consistent. But think its unfair of the teacher to ban food.

My ds is in year 2, he has an allergy to a range of E numbers, food colourings and preservatives. He had a 3 day hospital stay after touching a tick tack. I have no problem with sweets etc being handed out on birthdays, ds knows to say no thank you to these items and most of thr kids will bring something like bubbles or novelty pencil for ds. Your his parent if you don't want him to eat them just say no but don't ruining it for everybody else.

www.yalescientific.org/2010/09/mythbusters-does-sugar-really-make-children-hyper/

"In 1982, the National Institute of Health announced that no link between sugar and hyperactivity had been scientifically proven. Why, then, does this myth still persist? It may be mostly psychological. As previously stated, experimentation has shown that parents who believe in a link between sugar and hyperactivity see one, even though others do not. Another possibility is that children tend to be more excited at events like birthday and Halloween parties where sugary foods are usually served . People may have confused proximity with correlation although the environment is probably more to blame than the food."

Um t1 a basic cake is flour, eggs, sugar and butter. I'm pretty sure that is food, by anyone's standards

I usually suck it up when ds come out of nursery with haribo, but it bugs me a bit. I don't get the kill joy idea, that no one is having a nice time unless there is sugar involved (and we do have treats at home, I just don't kid myself that eating them is the only nice thing we do)
I also don't get the point that they will be in high school in a few years, would you say to a breast feeding mother or someone weaning their dc into home made food, that there is no point because their children will be given sweets and processed food in 6 or 7 years in school?

As others have said sugar high is a myth certainly he would have a bit of extra energy anyway yabu take the treats off him say this is for after dinner or whenever I think its nice the kids celebrate birthdays its not the schools responsibility to stop tantrums. You canbe that parent if you want but its spoiling for everybody else.

God I hate parents like this - whose own PFB hysteria ruins things for everyone else.

ICPJump I am 49 and I clearly remember sweets and cakes being handed on kids' birthdays at school so it's not some new fangled thing.

There is something in haribo sweets which has a negative effect on ds mood and behaviour, no idea what it is but it is certainly there! If he comes out with haribo though we just change it for something at home and I eat the haribo it's not something worth making a big issue about.

Why dont you say you would rather your son didnt have the sweets/cake

I just wish they wouldn't do it. I. Don't want to have to make 30 cupcakes or what have every year for DS to share.

I have never seen any home made stuff. Dd is in year 7. Never once was it homemade. But something if your issue is making it

NHS Eatwell Plate:

'Expat sorry but sweets are crap. There's no nutritional value at all and they are terrible for your teeth. Yes, a few every now and then isn't going to hurt too much, but they are crap.

Cakes and chocolate, not quite so bad, but basically still crap. Food is something that you can eat and digest - doesn't mean that it can't be bad for you.'

Sweets are just a form of sugar, which is present in many foods. They are not more terrible for your teeth than other types of food with natural sugars. I'm diabetic, they have a real value to me if I go hypo. The human body can eat sweets and digest them. They therefore meet your definition of food.

Cakes are eggs, flour, milk/water, butter. They are able to be digested by the human body and are therefore food. No more or less 'crap' than anything else eating out of moderation.

Labelling food as 'good' or 'bad' is silly and leads to disordered eating.

I love that many posters are referring to one study which 'disproved the sugar high myth' but conveniently ignoring the hundreds of articles, studies, reports written about the links between sugar and ill health.

The average Briton consumes 238 teaspoons of sugar each week. Every cake the eat contributes to it.

A bit of cake is not going to make a child ill or fat a tonne of cake eaten every day will make a child ill and fat fine if you dont want your child eating cake but cake isnt going to suddenly vanish because you dont want your kid to eat it

I'd rather DS ate a pack of haribo than a sausage or cheapo chicken.

All things in moderation, as my dad used to say. I've know adults with eating disorders which they say were caused by parents with a 'thou shalt not' attitude of some foods being banned. If you make it a big deal then it will become the forbidden fruit.

If kids have a sensible relationship with foods then when they are old enough to be out with their pals and pocket money, hopefully they won't OD on sugary crap.