WIBU to quit my job?

[Snowey101]

I have been in my new job for 3 weeks....and frankly, I'm wondering if I've made a terrible mistake.

In a nutshell and not going into too much detail- major unhappy work force, low morale & a rigid, tense working environment.

The person that I am taking over from (who is meant to be training me in their role) has seemed to have taken an instant dislike to me as from day 1 she's been snapping and snarling at me, doesn't give clear instructions therefore sometimes I don't 100% understand what I'm expected to do but am too afraid to ask her to clarify or ask her a Q as she just bites me head off.

Today she ignored me all day, pointedly, whilst cackling with some of my other colleagues. I felt so desperately unhappy today that I felt like crying.

The trouble is, I'm worried even if I did quit that I'd struggle to get another job as leaving a job after a few weeks or couple of months really doesn't look good does it and I'm not sure what on earth id say to a potential employer?

Feeling really down tonight. Just really not sure what to do.

Snowey, you've basically been given the green light by your boss to royally fuck her over. Go in tomorrow, cc the director. Keep going, I honestly think you can beat her at this.

And say (without the swearing) exactly what you just said you wanted to say to your boss.

This is the most ridiculous workplace.

Your job sounds very much like where I work. I've been bullied for years and I go home exhausted and emotionally drained every day. I've stuck it out for 13 years because now I now have no self-esteem left and I don't believe that anyone else would employ me.

What industry is this in out of curiosity? Sounds like my old work.

I bet you could guess the industry Bill, I can't really say as it would really out me but I guess it's probably not a common industry on MN!

Im in a similar place OP.

I had to leave a job I loved just before Xmas. It absolutely devastated me if im honest. Had an amazing boss, really supportive co workers that felt like my family.

Started a new job two weeks ago and while i feel settled ish- im not happy. The place is a mess- i havent even got my contract yet, they havent contacted my old boss for a reference (who is leaving herself next week), all of last years staff left within a week and I can see why, the manager is plain condesending and rude. It was always going to be tough for me to find another job I throoughly enjoyed but something isnt sitting right sometimes.

You have my sympathies. Life is miserable if someone chooses to make work a nightmare, and you spend so much time at work it's impossible not to let it affect the rest of your life.

It sounds like your boss wants you to drop her in it. He probably wants evidence that she's not performing and everyone else is too cowardly to do it. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain by constantly emailing for work and to confirm instructions and cc'ing the boss in message, as StatisticallyChallenged suggested. So what if you annoy Bitch 1? You can evidence that you've tried, which is important in a probationary period, and your work then have evidence to call her on her behaviour and maybe manage her out.

Urgh! Another day of drudgery. No work to do, oh joy!

Have you emailed ccing the director?

SEND THE DAMN EMAIL!!

OP you were told by your manager to email when there's no work, why aren't you doing that?

Tbh, you either need to be able to break this woman, i.e. really truly not give a shit and just keep emailing until you wear her down.

Or quit. I've done both in previous jobs. It felt bloody great to wear my tormentor down that we actually became friends and she wanted to call her dd my name

But it's liberating to just quit. I work in HR and if you've only got the one short non-temp role on your cv and can explain why you will be fine with other roles.

Email your boss like he told you to!

I did this morning, he said he'd be in in a couple of hours and will find something for me- hasn't appeared yet (boss & work)

Do you think I should go and speak to my boss and see whether my hours need to be reviewed? There is no way there is 37.5 hours worth of work here!!! Not whilst she's still doing the job too AND assigning work to my other colleague!

No you don't say your hours need reviewed, you just keep asking people other than her for work. Boss will presumably appear soon at which point I'd go over and say that you still don't have any work.

It could also be worth - in writing - requesting clarification of what specific tasks are supposed to be your responsibility. Give a few examples e.g "I am now unclear about this as I understood that x, y and z were part of my role however recently bitch has been assigning these jobs to colleague x. Have our responsibilities changed and if so what should I be picking up instead"

Try to get stuff carved out as clearly being yours.

I know it's tough in a new work place, but your boss gave you the perfect way to handle this.... You need to take what they said on board. If I was your line manager, I would probably be suggesting the same thing. If you have to email her daily, or ten times a day and cc the director in - that will build a body of evidence that they can use to tackle the issue. If you came to me again, and said "she still isn't giving me anything or training me". I would ask you why you haven't been emailing as agreed, and would be less likely to take you seriously. Lots of good advice about how to phrase the email in the thread, I'd add

" Hi bitchface, I have completed task X. I know that Y and Z are part of this role. As we haven't discussed how these should be done, shall we meet at to go through the procedure, and I will pick them up moving forward"

I don't understand why it is she is delegating you work. It's your job and you're 3 weeks in. I would simply get on with what you can do/know about and send the above email every day until something changes. if you plan to leave if it doesn't get any better, there's no harm in getting a little bit more spirited. You said it could be a great job...don't let bitchface take it from you. They clearly thought you up to it when they appointed you. Now it's time to prove it :)

I know I just need to keep bugging her for work, bug everyone for work. It's easier said than done though when you get met with hostility every time you ask (and I don't just mean from her, people generally are stressed and busy and I'm just a bugbear!)

I just want to know what my fucking role is, what my confirmed hours are, I've never even seen or signed a contract, what is my job title as it can't be what I originally accepted as she's still here doing that job.

I want to take ownership/ responsibility of things, to have set tasks. To know what I'm going into on a day to day basis.

I'm going to have to have yet ANOTHER meeting/ chat with my boss I think to discuss all of the above as this is just ridiculous.

If I could assign myself work and just get on with it then I would. Do they have some sort of training programme/ schedule in mind for me? Do they know where they want me to be/ what they want me to be doing by X week/ month? If they have, I'm not party to it!

It's just a complete fuck up in every sense of the word and yes, I will take bosses advice and email them when I don't have work, but there's only so long you want to be doing that for.

RedRainRocks I now know who to call next time I need a pep talk!

Poor you. It does sound like other people know she's a cow-bag though.

Can you offer to help others? People might really appreciate the help, and it would help cement your relationship with other people in the workplace. Even if you just did some filing for them or something. Would help you learn about the workplace as well.

I suggest you email whenever you need work, and when you don't get it, whip out a book and blatantly read it. If challenged you can politely say that you've asked for more work to do but haven't been given any yet. If you're not a reader, sewing or knitting or some other hobby from home you can do at your desk?

Go well! x

What is your job op?is ot a part of a company where you could have training on another site?

OP, start to keep a journal, broken down in 30 minute intervals, of everything happening at work, and everything Bitchface says to you.

If after a week it's not improved bring it to your boss. If he's not interested then it's time to find a new job. But don't give up without a fight!

Got in this morning and surprise, surprise no work left for me. I'm going to have to email my boss AGAIN!!! This is getting ridiculous. Surely he's going to get pissed orff with this? He's a busy man, I'm sure he doesn't want to have to keep scrabbling around trying to find me work all the time!

I'll email him again today and if he's on his own at any point throughout the day I'm going to go in and have it out. I can't go on line this, the money is good and I really need it right now, but this is soul destroying and the atmosphere between her and I is awful. She literally won't look at me- let alone speak to me or assign me work.

I think I've almost reached the point of not caring now whether I have to leave this job. The whole things a mess, I've never seen or signed a contract, I have no idea what my job title even is as the job I was employed to do, she is still doing and is set to continue to do a vast amount of it indefinitely, with other bits meant to be handed over to me by April. Fat change of that, I'm not being taught anything.

When she does give me a task she doesn't explain it properly, then moans and bitches if I make an error.

The whole thing is just one big horror story. Going to ring the agencies tonight and tomorrow and find out how much temp work they have at the moment, if I should need it.

This situation just isn't sustainable long term and I'd love to hear what my boss says about all of the above if I get to speak to him today.

This continues to sound horrific and I honestly don't think it is going to improve. I wouldn't ask your boss if he has some free time, I would tell him that you need to meet with him today or tomorrow. Does he have a PA with access to his diary?

I think you should start with the fact that you haven't got a contract or any clarification about your role yet. It's never a good idea to start a new job without having that, how did that come about?

If you think there is any danger of getting emotional in the meeting I would make a written note of what you wish to say about your colleague and the working environment and be very calm about reading out specific examples of lack of work, her attitude etc. I would ask for a plan of how the boss is going to deal with this - woolly statements about her being a bitch to everyone is not good enough, you need concrete examples and a timescale of how this will be dealt with. I would remind him that he said they were overloaded with work, they have gone to the bother of recruiting you, you are available and willing to work and are not being given the opportunity to do so. After the meeting I would resend the whole thing as an email to him. Take notes during the meeting as well which will help you in keeping calm and not having to look him in the eye all the time!

Ultimately, I'm not sure it is going to make any difference but if you end up leaving you can at least leave with your held held high, knowing that you were professional and tried everything to make it work, and at least your colleagues's card is marked for next time.

Surely he's going to get pissed orff with this?

So let him - maybe he'll fix it then. He's told you to mail and cc him when you need more work. Do as he says. Do as a lot of people in this thread have said.

Look at it from his perspective - he's aware there's an issue, but he can't act on hearsay and gossip. You need to mail the work requests and cc him - this is giving him evidence that she's not doing her job of training you. We've had a problematic manager, but as his manager pointed out, no one came to him about it - they either left and said they'd found alternative employment, rather than saying the reason they were going was because of bullying manager, or whinged to colleagues and stayed miserable. Nothing there will get things changed.

You are in a position to get this changed. The manager has told you to include him on mails. If you don't keep pointing out how bad things are, he might think it's improved.

If it were me, I'd draw up a list of things we've covered and where possible, a list of things you know you still need to learn. I'd ask the birch and the manager to confirm if this is as they understand it, to let you know what other tasks should be on the list - and to provide a timetable of when the training for all this can be done. If she then refuses to speak or hand tasks over, you'll be able to say, this was agreed to be done by date X. And it should show more clearly that she's the problem.

Can you suggest to the boss that she be made to write down a few instructions sheets for the job so that you've got it all in writing and don't have to keep asking her when you have queries?

This sounds utterly untenable. When you don't have any work to do (which sounds like most of the time), use it to start looking for other work. Did you get this job through an agency? If yes, definitely give them a call and let them know what is going on. They can support you, help you look for other positions plus they should know that, if they put anyone else into a role in this company, similar things are likely to happen. Just looking for other work will make you feel more positive I promise! I once left a job after 3 months - the people were generally lovely but it was deadly quiet and boring and I was young and wanting a bit more of a buzzy, busy atmosphere. In my cv and subsequent interviews, I was honest and just said the above. In your case, I would tell people that the role just wasn't enough for you (which is true after all) and that will sound pretty good i.e. that you want to be busy and in the thick of it rather than twiddling your thumbs and scratching around for things to do.

Btw, I really like the suggestion of a pp to surreptitiously record the bitch and then play her worst greatest hits back to your boss and HR. She cannot be allowed to get away with such disgusting behaviour!!