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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Boy George is quite beautiful isn't he?

264 replies

OohMavis · 06/02/2016 22:20

Or am I being lulled by his make-up team and the strange studio lighting on The Voice.

Think I'm getting a bit of a crush Blush

OP posts:
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Sparklingbrook · 07/02/2016 16:08

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/music/2565874-for-the-love-of-Boy-George?msgid=59139894

Here's the link for Samcro's thread Caffeinator. I hadn't heard that song.

Caffeinator · 07/02/2016 16:16

Great, thank you. I'll pop over there now.

bibbitybobbityyhat · 07/02/2016 19:28

Well said Hygge.

usual · 07/02/2016 19:34

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LassWiTheDelicateAir · 07/02/2016 19:47

Makes your 'flesh crawl'?

Sounds like homophobia is alive and well on MN

Tom Jones makes my flesh craw ; always has done. I find him utterly repulsive and creepy.Sean Connery is the same. My reaction has nothing to do with their being heterosexual and respectively Welsh and Scottish.

Boy George and Adam Ant were both beautiful in their hay days. Neither is beautiful now.

Aeroflotgirl · 07/02/2016 19:57

Nope sorry he doesent do it for me!

Aeroflotgirl · 07/02/2016 19:59

My goodness why is it homophobic to find him not attractive Hmm. I don't, he does not float my boat, the same way Terry Wigan or Tom Jones does not! I know a few gay men who do, I find quite attractive.

SurferJet · 07/02/2016 20:00

For some crimes I'm all in favour of locking them up & throwing away the key, or even hanging the bastards - but for some reason I can't get worked up about Boy George's past. And it's not just because I like him, I just don't think what he did is worthy of my anger & hatred. He didn't kill anyone, his crime didn't involve children - he left a male escort ( with whom he'd been taking drugs with ) 'shocked & traumatised' - ok, fair enough, I'm sure it wasn't the best of experiences - but BG only got 16 months so hardly crime of the century.
It's all a bit meh to me.

BertrandRussell · 07/02/2016 20:02

"Makes your 'flesh crawl'?

Sounds like homophobia is alive and well on MN"

Bollocks. You can think an individual gay man is a repulsive creep without being homophobic. Oh look, here is me doing it.

Hygge · 07/02/2016 20:05

Me, usual?

No, I don't want everyone to say that.

But I do think people need to consider the affects of his crime more deeply than they seem to be doing on this thread.

It's wrong to say that nobody cares. People do care. His victim most of all, and he's spoken out to tell people exactly how he feels about George being given this job on the BBC. I don't think his feelings should be dismissed out of hand.

And I don't think we should pretend the crime never happened, just because George has served his time and been hired by the BBC, as was suggested in the post I quoted. I'm not sure the BBC are the best judge of character unfortunately, or sure that being employed by them is a sign that his past is of no concern anymore.

As I said, I liked him before, I like him now. His crime has done me no harm though, so my feelings about him are in no way as important as those of his victim, and I think his victim deserves to be heard and acknowledged.

On a website that promotes the We Believe You campaign, and one that's been so very vocal about the Ched Evans rape case (to use probably the most high-profile example) I don't think we should forbid ourselves from talking about the past crimes of people in the news.

George committed a violent crime, he tricked his victim into visiting his home, ambushed him with the help of a friend, beat his victim, handcuffed him to a wall, threatened him with sex toys, chains, and straps, then attacked him again with a chain as he finally made his escape in just underwear and shoes.

His victim was apparently left "shocked, degraded, and traumatised" by the attack, according to the judge at the trial, and by his own account has needed years of therapy to recover.

I'm all for people changing their ways and working to prove they deserve their second chance. From all I can gather, George seems to have done that, although I believe an apology to his victim would be a part of that and his victim says that has never happened.

But I also feel it's an injustice to his victim to try and sweep all of that under the carpet under the banner of "he's served his time" or "nobody cares now" and insist that nobody talks about it because people like George and we should be leaving him alone now.

We wouldn't say that on here about other people who committed that type of violent crime, his victim is right about that.

Again, it's a double-standard between a 'likeable' person like George committing a crime and an unlikeable one like Jimmy Savile or Ched Evans committing one.

And I'm not going to pretend that's okay with me. But I'm not the person on the thread telling other people what they can or can't say about it.

Sparklingbrook · 07/02/2016 20:07

Start a thread then. So everyone can have a good go.

witsender · 07/02/2016 20:08

I dislike him intensely and cannot understand why he still gets the endorsement of TV gigs given his history.

BertrandRussell · 07/02/2016 20:09

"- but for some reason I can't get worked up about Boy George's past."

Possibly because his victim was a gay "escort" -aka prostitute?

Did someone mention homophobia?

usual · 07/02/2016 20:10

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AMouseLivedinaWindMill · 07/02/2016 20:11

Hygee what you have said highlights probably how all victims of crime feel.

they feel the pain of the crime long after the criminal has served his time. Its just not every victims perpetrator is going to go on telly.

Funny though how on some threads some posters are very strict and un wavering in their respect of the law, the implication being its all just, right, and never makes a mistake... then seem to feel comfortable to keep judging the criminal after time has been served. Confused

usual · 07/02/2016 20:15

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user838383 · 07/02/2016 20:20

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LassWiTheDelicateAir · 07/02/2016 20:20

If he were straight and his victim had been a female prostitute I doubt MN would be so forgiving.

How many people, including me, said Ched Evans should not return to premier league football. He's done his time too. (And before it is pointed out I am aware Ched Evans' victim was not a prostitute or an escort- that aspect is not relevant)

It is not homophobic to find him deeply physically unattractive.

Hygge · 07/02/2016 20:27

I'm asking this a lot tonight, but me, Sparkling?

I don't want everyone to have a good go.

I've spoken as honestly as I can about my opinion on his past, and on his victims feelings at this present time.

And I've spoken about my belief that of the two, in any crime, the victim's feelings should be more important than the person commenting the crime.

Just because one person is famous and attractive, and therefore has a fan base, while the other is a gay escort nobody has heard of, doesn't matter to me.

This is a thing that happened. It's recently been brought back to public attention because of the victims feelings about George's new job. It was already being discussed on this thread when I came to it (to agree actually that George does look very good on the Voice) and I got side-tracked by a comment about nobody caring anymore about what he did.

Which is wrong. People do care, many of them on this thread, but most importantly the man he attacked and imprisoned.

And I don't think it's right to try and pretend something didn't happen just because the celebrity who committed the crime is a likeable one. Even though I like him.

So I have no reason to start a thread and have a go, but I will say how I feel on this one.

usual I think that his victim's feelings need to be respected. I don't think that saying "nobody cares" is respectful to his victim and that was and still is my point.

Many people on here believe that Ched Evans deserves to work again, but not in football. I suppose the same could be said of George, especially if his celebrity played a part in his crime.

What I said, if you look, is that George seems to be making the most of his second chance and has changed his ways to prove he deserves it. I'm glad about that, but I do have sympathy for the victims of criminals who are in the public eye.

To make it very clear, no I don't think he should never work again, I don't think he should never be on TV either. I like him on the Voice, I've already made that clear. But I appreciate it must be very difficult for his victim and I feel sorry for that man. And I couldn't let the comment that "nobody cares" pass by without saying so, because actually I do care if the victim of a violent drug fuelled crime feels his recovery has been affected by the person who attacked him gaining a high profile job.

It's a difficult situation because people do have the right to a second chance, but I feel for the victim who has to watch that second chance be played out on TV and in the press for weeks and months to come. Because I don't think I would recover from having an attack like that happen to me in a hurry, and I don't think you would either, and I know I would find it distressing to see my attacker on TV week after week while people excused him as having served his time and they no longer care.

AdriftOnMemoryBliss · 07/02/2016 20:27

Ched raped someone, as part of a drunken night out with his mates.

His crime is very different from what BG did.

Sparklingbrook · 07/02/2016 20:33

Anybody Hygge. Clearly people have a lot to say on the matter. Itching to have a good go.

DixieNormas · 07/02/2016 20:33

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SisterMoonshine · 07/02/2016 20:46

I've always thought of BG as a vain, unhinged, control freak.
I did see him live once - in his Hare Krishna phase.

Hygge · 07/02/2016 21:03

People having a lot to say doesn't equate to them "having a good go" though. Not when it's just the facts of what happened and the feelings of the victim, which are what I've been saying are important all along.

The feelings of the victim and the need to show him some respect. And that respect includes acknowledging the crime and the way it has affected him even now, rather than saying nobody cares.

People have had quite a "good go" at Paloma on this thread, just because they don't like her speaking voice or the way she comes across on screen, which is possibly just as much down to editing as anything else. To me that's worse than reminding people about George's past and asking them to be mindful of his victim's feelings now.

I actually quite like her as well.

His victim has spoken publicly about his feelings on George's new role as mentor on the Voice.

No matter what people feel about George, those feelings need to be respected. They don't necessarily mean that George shouldn't have the job, but as the victim says he feels his recovery from his ordeal, after eight years of therapy, has been set back by this appointment, it's wrong to say that George has served his time and nobody cares.

The victim is still serving his own time, and he cares. I felt it was important to point that out. We can't pretend it never happened or say nobody cares just because the prison sentence is over, because the victim is still suffering and to deny that suffering is wrong.

But nowhere have I said that the key should have been thrown away or that he should never work again or even that people should have a go at him just for the sake of it. I don't know where any of that came from.

I took issue with someone saying nobody cares now, which I feel is an insult to the victim of what was a horrible and violent crime. Liking the man who committed the crime doesn't come into it. He's obviously moved on and I'm glad he has, but his victim is still suffering and doesn't deserve to be told nobody cares.

I will keep saying that if necessary, but I don't accept that doing so means I'm having a go at George.

Sparklingbrook · 07/02/2016 21:05

It's all been said. Many times.