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AIBU?

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Original poster

to be having a bit of a sense of humour failure over this?

330 replies

Ellybellyboo · 31/01/2016 11:11

Sorry, this might be a bit long winded

I like 'creative' stuff - sewing, drawing, photography, etc - general art-ery fart-ery. The attic of our house had been converted to a huge room when we moved here so I use it as a kind of studio.

A few weeks ago I had a big birthday and DH arranged a surprise birthday party. I had been really clear that I absolutely did not want a party, I'm quite introverted and just didn't want a big hoo-ha.

He arranged one anyway. I was a bit miffed but grinned and bared it, and actually had an OK night.

In the weeks since, I've discovered that some of our friends had been up in my studio and played some oh so hilarious practical jokes. There was absolutely no need for them to go up there, there's no toilet or anything up there and the door at the bottom of the stairs was shut.

Nothing has been broken or damaged, but silly stuff like a cock and balls drawn onto every page of a sketch book, a huge quilt I've been making and had pinned out ready to be quilted has had all the pins removed, all my drawers and storage had been rearranged.

A couple of years ago I saved up and bought myself a DSLR camera. It wasn't cheap so I'm a bit precious about it. Yesterday we went out for a day out so thought I'd take my camera. Turned it on to find about a million photos of bare arses and I'm not very happy about it

It just feels a bit disrespectful, they shouldn't have been upstairs in the first place and I don't like that they've been messing with my stuff. The more time goes on and the more of this shit I find, the less impressed I am. The whole camera thing is the final straw and I'm having a bit of a sense of humour failure

OP posts:
bakeoffcake · 31/01/2016 14:48
Angry

Send them the sketch book with a little note "As this is now full of your artwork, I thought you'd like to keep it".

Veritat · 31/01/2016 14:50

Woollytights, if someone went into your private workroom and deliberately undid hours of work, would you regard that as "harmless and minor"?

CaptainCrunch · 31/01/2016 14:51

Why are people telling the op not to post the arse photos on Facebook, she's never said for a minute she'd behave like that, she's clearly got too much class and dignity for these awful people.

AnyFucker · 31/01/2016 14:53

Some people are urging her to post the photos on social media and others are saying "no, don't do that".

originalmavis · 31/01/2016 14:53

I'd be raging. Someone will squeal because when sober, at least one person will realise that they have done a shitty thing.

PatheticNurse · 31/01/2016 14:54

What has your DH said about this?

CaptainCrunch · 31/01/2016 14:55

The op already knows who did it and has no intention of being vengeful.

QueenCarpetJewels · 31/01/2016 15:02

I'm furious on your behalf OP What absolute fucking arseholes they've been. If it was my husband, he'd be forgiven for throwing the surprise party because it was clearly done out of love. (I'd fucking hate to have a surprise party, if that makes me a 'killjoy' in some random internet stranger's eyes, so what?)
But what your so-called friends did? Dickheads. I'm like you but minus the studio (oh, for a studio to call my own!) and this would really fucking upset me. It's cruel and nasty. One defaced page in my sketchbook I could live with but EVERY page? No. Good sketchbooks are not cheap!! And the pins!! I've never attempted a quilt purely because of the time and effort it would take, how vicious to do what they did to it. They've cost you so much time, I'd be absolutely gutted.
If nothing else, they've been in your private space and fucked things up, oh hardy-har-har, hilarious joke. I'd feel violated.
Fucking twats. God I'm really raging for you OP, they'd be getting a very bad reaction from me, face to face. I'd love to go into their private space and do similar to them and see how they liked it, but two wrongs don't make a right as they say!

DinosaursRoar · 31/01/2016 15:11

The arse photos are the only bit that could be seen as just a joke to make you laugh, the others are jokes at your expense, not something to make you giggle, but to upset you because your upset would be funny to them.

Are they really your friends, or more your DHs friends? They don't seem to like you, or realise that while they might find it funny, you would obviously find it hurtful. If it's really that they are DHs friends, tell him you don't want to socialise with them anymore as they clearly don't care that their actions hurt you, but your fine if he wants to see them, however you can't trust them in your home.

Don't have people in your life who laugh at you rather than with you.

Jessesbitch · 31/01/2016 15:25

Idiotic twats.

laurierf · 31/01/2016 15:25

Oh the quilt! Shock That's just fucking mean! Sad The sketchpad and photos are very juvenile, wasteful and rude... but the quilt... that's so deliberately destructive!

TinklyLittleLaugh · 31/01/2016 15:32

Actually I think the sketchbooks old upset me the most. My sketchbook is like my journal of ideas. Horrible to have someone nose around at it, let alone deface it.

UptownFunk00 · 31/01/2016 15:33

How old are these people? They sound beyond immature!

YouGottaKeepEmSeparated · 31/01/2016 15:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ToomuchChocolatemeansBootcamp · 31/01/2016 15:41

I think the best response was the one suggested by a PP that your DH email everyone that was at the party, saying thanks but letting them all know how much of your time has been wasted and personal space invaded. I'm sorry this happened, they sound nasty and I wouldn't have them in my house again either. Who goes into private rooms at a party for a start, never mind taking through and defacing your things? Mean and horrible.

ToomuchChocolatemeansBootcamp · 31/01/2016 15:42

*raking not taking sorry

dammmit · 31/01/2016 15:46

I can't help thinking of the length of time it must have taken them to do all this, especially unpinning the quilt. I mean, drawing a cock and balls once, for example, I could understand that in a daft drunken moment for a laugh. But what were they thinking for all that time?! Why did none of them start to feel bad, or say "aw come on, this is a bit much" etc. Horrible and hurtful.

Summerisle1 · 31/01/2016 15:47

I'd be fucking raging. There's no way this should be minimised or assumed to be 'really quite funny'. It's never funny to deface other people's property or use things without permission. If I found that anyone had used my DSLRs then they'd be finding my monopod right up the arses they thought so amusing to take pictures of.

I agree that your DH should email the culprits and say just how upset their unfunny actions were. You wouldn't expect this sort of behaviour from visiting children, let alone adults.

Original poster
Ellybellyboo · 31/01/2016 15:49

Thanks!

No, I'm not going to post the pics anywhere. I deleted them anyway, there were bloody loads of them so I just erased the card before we went out.

There was just no need for them to be up there, other than to cause mischief. If there was a loo up there and there was a queue for the bathroom then thought, oh, let's fiddle with the knobs on her sewing machine or something, but they deliberately went in there to do stupid shit like this

They do know they've upset me, DH has seen them since.

They are more DH's friends than mine I guess, I probably wouldn't have chosen to invite them if I had been organising it.

I don't think they realise the amount of time it takes to do stuff like that. I enjoy it, so they don't see the harm. The sketch pad was blank and only a cheapo one so I'm not too fussed, and it took seconds to delete the pictures, the quilt isn't actually damaged - the top was sewn together, I'd pinned the top to the batting and backing, and these are the pins they removed.

They seem to think its harmless fun as nothing was actually damaged

OP posts:
Summerisle1 · 31/01/2016 15:50

Sorry, that should read 'upsetting their actions were'. It'd also be a very long time, if ever, before these unpleasant people crossed my threshold again. It also strikes me as sheer nastiness because it takes some time and effort to unpin a quilt, draw cocks and balls all over a sketchbook and pose for umpteen arse pictures.

Original poster
Ellybellyboo · 31/01/2016 15:52

And yes, it must have taken them ages.

There were lots of people there so neither DH or I noticed they'd gone, but it must have taken a while and at no point did they think, actually this has gone too far

OP posts:
MaisyMooMoo · 31/01/2016 15:52

I'm glad you've managed to get everything back to normal OP.

I would also be expecting some apology flowers and chocolates from the culprits Grin

peggyundercrackers · 31/01/2016 15:55

I kind of agree with wooly - I couldn't get Fuming, livid or raging at someone using some blank paper, drawing on them and taking pics which can be deleted, moving stuff about in drawers etc. - its all petty stuff. only thing I would be annoyed about is undoing the pins but even then doesn't seem a big deal to me. nothing was ruined or broken or damaged so no real harm done.

I hope you don't have kids OP because these kind of things happen every day in our house.

laurierf · 31/01/2016 15:58

For me, pinning the sandwich of a quilt is the bit I really don't enjoy... the idea of having someone unpin a double bed size sandwich 'for a laugh' Angry

You're right, they don't get it, but as said it must have taken them ages to be so destructive... so they couldn't work out it would have taken you twice as long to construct it?! Dickheads.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 31/01/2016 15:59

I hope you don't have kids OP because these kind of things happen every day in our house

Really? Not in mine they did.