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AIBU?

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Original poster

Joint email addresses

66 replies

JackandDiane · 31/01/2016 08:11

I've just seen a shocker. Names changed to protect the innocent
[email protected]

Not only sharedy. But with sub groups. does wanker gesture

What if you want to email tom not jemima ?

OP posts:
fastdaytears · 31/01/2016 08:13

Well presumably there's also [email protected] so you'd email that. Also [email protected] (be offended if they give you that) and [email protected] (awkward if not specified who that goes to)

GloGirl · 31/01/2016 08:14

Think this is fine. It's a bit Smugville, but a lot of things are.

You're emailing whoever gave you the email address. Nowadays no one emails me private personal information, so my DH could share my account if we wanted.

If someone needed to tell me something private, they could Facebook or Text etc.

Throwingshade · 31/01/2016 08:14

What do you mean sub groups, the 'rugby' bit? Is it not a club or hobby thing? (I know you've changed the actual word)

BikeRunSki · 31/01/2016 08:14

Maybe Jemima and Tom are as one kindred mind and have no secrets?

Birdsgottafly · 31/01/2016 08:17

Wouldn't you just put the Name in the 'Subject' box at the top of the message?

I know my DDs and used to know her DPs, password, before phones did as much as they do, they are 'over sharers', in RL.

My DD (30) works long hours and has signed up to Groupon etc, she regularly asks me to tidy up her Hotmail.

CasperGutman · 31/01/2016 08:20

I have a domain name registered for my emails, so [email protected] reaches me. I didn't realise there was anything "smug" about it. I just thought it was useful, because I can use any actual email provider without telling people a new address and have specific addresses for different purposes.

SaucyJack · 31/01/2016 08:20

What's the big deal?

Maybe Tom has nothing to hide or no reason to care if Jemima opens up an e-mail from Gav or Joe asking when the next rugby training sesh is or whose turn it is to buy the half time oranges.

Or maybe Jemima is a psycho hose beast or Tom has a history of emotional affairs.

Whatevs.

CadleCrap · 31/01/2016 08:21

I know someone with a joint Facebook account- now that is fucking weird!

CasperGutman · 31/01/2016 08:24

Maybe they don't have a shared email address at all. There's no reason to think that [email protected] and [email protected] go to the same inbox any more than [email protected] and [email protected] would!

Katenka · 31/01/2016 08:25

So they have their own domain and both have emails for it.

Can't see the big deal. But then me and dh run a business together so my email is

[email protected]

His is

[email protected]

I'm actual fact we can see both.

Can't see what's smug about it.

SparklesandBangs · 31/01/2016 08:33

We have a shared family calendar and a family email address, if all the school emails etc go there we can both see them and if they have been answered.
We have our own emails too, well I have 4 more.

It's not odd its practical.

Me624 · 31/01/2016 09:02

My PIL have this. [email protected] (not their actual names obv). I think it's extremely weird, like they are one person. They also only have one mobile phone between them. They're not even THAT old - in their late 60s/early 70s. They are a very insular couple, never really spend any time apart or socialise separately, so maybe it makes sense to them.

See also joint Facebook accounts - I know a couple with one of these Hmm

Snowball789 · 31/01/2016 09:37

I have a joint email account with my husband which is used for correspondence with companies (i.e. bills etc). Wider family use it to keep in touch which is fine as there is nothing that we can't both know. Any deeply personal conversations with friends etc are done in person, by Facetime, text & mobile etc but we are pretty open with each other and don't have secrets. My husband also has an individual email for his business, but I still access that as I do the accounts!

It's not 'smug', it's practical because we both need to know what is going on with finances. Seems common sense rather than something to cause others offence. Really OP, get a grip/life!

MrsItsNoworNotatAll · 31/01/2016 09:55

It might work for them to have a joint email address.

They might have separate ones.

They might not be doing it to be smug.

They might not realise they're offending some people.

They and I hope they don't give a fuck if they are!!

wonkylegs · 31/01/2016 10:01

We have individual accounts, work accounts and a family account - '[email protected]', and a junk marketing account for when you need to fill in an email but have no reason to actually hear from the company again.
It makes it easier to prioritise and sort them, people given one address won't necessarily be given any of the others or know of their existence.

Nanny0gg · 31/01/2016 10:01

it does strike me as strange.

People on here tend to get a bit irate at letters addressed to Mr & Mrs Whoever, but Jack&[email protected] is the email equivalent

I understand shared email for household stuff but I am amazed at how many people only have shared email, not their own address.

Redcrayons · 31/01/2016 10:02

I have a 'family' one for stuff like schools, bills etc. also use it for the calendar so DCs can see it on the iPad.

Have a personal one as well.

Original poster
JackandDiane · 31/01/2016 10:32

Having your own email address, does not mean that you were trying to hide guilty secrets. It's part of your own identity and not looking like you have to do everything with her husband.

OP posts:
Original poster
JackandDiane · 31/01/2016 10:32

Plus what if I don't want Tom to know what I'm emailing about? It's the idea of opening someone else's letters

OP posts:
EmmaWoodlouse · 31/01/2016 10:37

We have a family one which is [email protected]. I also have a hotmail account which I use for setting up IDs on talkboards, and I suppose I would use that if I ever wanted to keep an e-mail correspondence secret. However, that has never happened. DH doesn't have a separate one at all. I've never yet had an e-mail that I wouldn't want him to read, and as for opening each other's by mistake, it's usually pretty obvious who they're for by who the sender is!

Sallystyle · 31/01/2016 10:38

The things people find to be annoyed about it shocking at times.

If a couple shares an email address it doesn't mean they have to do everything with each other. DH doesn't have his own separate amazon account because he sees no point when our joint bank details are on mine anyway. He often uses my email address because he rarely looks at his and knows I always look at mine. I don't know if he uses his at all anymore.

I am sure the couple have their own identity and having a joint email address doesn't take away from that.

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 31/01/2016 10:51

It's part of your own identity and not looking like you have to do everything with her husband

We have a shared email address, and our own separate work/private ones.

Like other posters said, sometimes it's practical to have a joint one. To suggest that this is because we simply 'have to do everything together' strikes me as slightly juvenile.

I'm amazed it bothers you even a teeny, tiny bit. 'A shocker?' Really?

PurpleDaisies · 31/01/2016 10:58

It works for them-I don't understand why it's a big deal. We have our own email addresses but check each other's regularly. It would be easier to have a shared one. We also open each other's letters.

I don't get why it would be smug.

PaulAnkaTheDog · 31/01/2016 11:02

I'm more offended by the idea that you think an email address is part of your own identity tbh.

MotherKat · 31/01/2016 12:43

They have a shared domain, no reason to think they have no individual email.
The email as part of one's identity is something I understand, it is part of living online, but I'm confused by the idea of being connected enough to feel that way, but not tech savvy enough to understand a domain doesn't necessarily mean they're sharing an inbox.