Joint email addresses

[JackandDiane]

I've just seen a shocker. Names changed to protect the innocent
[email protected]

Not only sharedy. But with sub groups. does wanker gesture

What if you want to email tom not jemima ?

[HicDraconis]

Nothing wrong with a family based domain name - ours is draconis-family.net. Within that there is [email protected], DH@, ds1@ and ds2@. DC emails forwarded to DH@ currently because they're only 8&9 - they have their own email accounts on the school gmail setup anyway for homework.

Emails go to separate devices but occasionally I'll open dh's by mistake (and realise instantly when I see a whole list of mails from planets.nu) and vice versa.

It's a handy way of keeping my email address the same no matter who my email provider is - so if we change telecom company I don't have to send out several emails with a new address.

We have one joint bank account, one joint credit card and one joint mortgage as well.

I have friends who have one joint Facebook page, which they both update as and when they want to. It isn't strange at all.

[LittleBeautyBelle]

A shared email or FB account just seems strange. The first thing that comes to mind when I see this is that one of the couple wants to keep an eye on the other, doesn't trust, has reason to not trust, etc. I bet most people think this when they see a shared email or FB.

With that said, I also know older couples who do this and so for them it's probably because they're hardly on FB, or it's simpler, I don't know. I still think it's weird. Why not have your own?

The school has both our emails and cell numbers, so we both get the information.

It's weird because if you're sending an email to someone yet there's another name on it, it just seems awkward. Dear Jill (hi John!), blah blah, best, L

[Me624]

I'm surprised by how many people say they don't get "personal" emails. I email my mum, my brother and sister, certain friends who I don't see in person that often all the time to swap news etc. Yes I text all those people too but I would always use email for a longer catch up. None of it is exactly secret - I wouldn't really care if DH wanted to read it - but it's my personal email and I just wouldn't really want him to be going through it all regularly. In the same way that we both know the passcodes to get into each other's phones but we don't read each other's texts.

[lavendersun]

I don't understand the fuss either.

Now, if I chose to share an e-mail address with someone I didn't share my home, life, bed, finances, etc., etc., with I might get it.

[Whathaveilost]

Really can't get worked up over this. To me an email address is just like a letter box and who ever it is obviously intended for opens it.

I wouldn't expect any one to email personal stuff. Most of our emails are deleted anyway!

I couldn't careless about people having joint Facebook accounts either.
Really not a big deal for me.

[Sallystyle]

The only emails I get are spam, bill reminders or confirming an order really.

haven't received a confidential email for... well ever!

[Pigeonpost]

Eh? Our home email is [email protected]. It's the one we use for joint stuff like banking, schools, online shopping etc. Both also have own personal web based emails too. I must be missing the issue...

[SaucyJack]

Does anybody even use e-Mail for anything even vaguely interesting these days anyway?

I've just checked mine, and the only one that's of an even remotely personal nature is one from the library sending me an advance reminder for a book DD1 needs to return next week.

Call me emotionally enmeshed, but I honestly would not care if DP read it on my behalf.

[Trills]

I suppose my feelings about joint email addresses are much like my feelings about joint bank accounts.

They are OK as additions to having personal ones, but the idea of only having a joint one fills me with horror.

[Ragwort]

Oh well, perhaps it's OK for us then as we are quite old (over 50) .

If you don't have a joint email, and have school age children, do you expect schools/sports clubs/orthodontist etc to send two separate emails every time they want to communicate with the parents? And who would reply - wouldn't that just cause even more inconvenience?

I bet many mothers fall into the trap of doing all the 'home and school' admin ....... by having a join email account at least you can both see what is going on.

[Trills]

Ugh.

No.

Only OK if the couple in question are quite old and don't actually USE email for anything much.

[NameChange1815]

I want stuff related to our bills, our car and our children to go to an obviously joint address. I don't think that's wanky. It's also relevant for joint party invitations (we don't have Facebook).

[NameChange1815]

There are loads of things that are applicable to both halves of a couple. All our utility stuff and school related things come through email, so we want that to go to an email that both of us can access. I also have a formal personal email address to be used for job applications etc.

There was a brief time at which you might have recieved truly personal communications by email and it would have been strange to have a joint one, but nowadays anything like that would happen by text surely.

[SnozzberryMincePie]

My parents have a shared email address because I set it up for them. They are barely computer literate and turning the computer on and logging in is a joint effort for them.

[JackandDiane]

domain names fine IMO, but not jointy name shite

[MrsPigling]

My original email address has 'myname'and'hisname'@ntlworld.com. It's not a joint email though, just me! His original email is 'hisname'and'myname'@ntlworld.com.

I've had mine 17 years and he's had his for 15 years. I could probably work out his password and log into his mail if I wanted, as could he with mine.

[lavendersun]

Same here Ragwort. I am not interested in reading his, nor him mine.

I will say things like - 'best friend' e-mailed saying such and such, he is fond of her Dh but not friendly enough to e-mail/see him without us. In my inbox, can you read it and let me know what you think about dates/plans etc., etc..

Yes, I am sure there are many ways around sharing if you didn't want to or found a reason not to , I like a simple life!

Shared everything here, when we married we pooled our savings/investments and made everything financial joint as well.

[ThenLaterWhenItGotDark]

No strong feelings about joint emails, though I would never do it, or joint bank accounts (ditto) but joint FB invariably is the woman desperate for everyone to know she's living the happy family dream.
I have 4 such couples on my FB and none of the blokes ever look or participate. "Nah it was Gloria who set the page up, why the fuck would I want to be looking at photos of what I've just had for my dinner"

[squoosh]

Oh Lord, are non business related family domain names now a thing?

[Ragwort]

DH and I have a shared email address - it's just easy and practical for us; it's got nothing to do with mine (or his) identity - we have a shared bank account as well.

I am sure if one of us wanted to have some secret emails we could easily find a way round it ..... but as most of our emails are routine business or practical matters (school stuff etc) it doesn't worry me in the slightest. I do receive a few emails from friends, but my DH is bored senseless by them and wouldn't read them & even if he did there is nothing that interesting in them .

[Scholes34]

Oh dea, is this a problem? We have a joint e-mail address, a joint bank account, plus we share a house and a bed.

[RockNRollNerd]

There's quite a difference between himandher@g mail.com and [email protected], [email protected] [email protected] etc. The former is probably a shared email, not my thing but if it works for them so what, the latter are separate email addresses and quite likely not read by both people.

What you've described as subgroup wankery is actually a bloody good idea. I'm currently sitting here working through my inbox labelling stuff that relates to different committees I sit on. If I could be fagged to set up new email addresses for them then in some ways it would be a lot easier.

[CrotchetQuaverMinim]

loads of people have a shared domain name - "@familysuchandsuch" or "@thisstreethouse" or whatever, no different that the couple using their names or initial. You can still set up loads of individual addresses that only one person has access to, all within that domain name. It doesn't mean they actually share an email address (though they could).

[Katenka]

My email is not part of my identity. I have my business one and my personal one for mn.

If you don't want to Tom to know something don't email it.

[LalaLyra]

We have a shared domain, but we have our own emails and tom and jemima probably also have their own emails.

I have [email protected]. He has [email protected]. We also both have access to [email protected] for bills, kids schools etc.

He doesn't have access to my emails (he'd be bored shitless if he did), I don't have access to his and the joint one is whoever opens email first.