AIBU to not breastfeed?

[Stephieee]

DD is yet to arrive, but I never breastfed with DS and my goodness, I was made to feel terrible about it! I've told people that I'm not going to, this time around, but their views haven't changed :(

OP is obviously feeling something if she's asking the question flatonthehill.
And it does make a difference what type of milk the baby has, hence all the medical proof?

Ah but is it the act of feeding, or the milk itself, that passes on the intelligence? And are intelligent, educated mothers more likely to select a chimp or an orangutan?

Could the "orangutans are more intelligent" argument be a myth purported by orangutan marketing companies?

If IQ is passed on directly through breastmilk some of the BF babies I know are screwed

Disappointed I wanted to express. HCPs in hospital told me to not even bother because it would be "too much effort for me" hmm next time I've resolved to basically ignore whatever they say and figure it out on my own now that there are actually some local breastfeeding services in my area!

It was a lot of effort but I took it day by day and managed 8+ months. I refused all "help" from the HCPs at the hospital as I knew it would all fall into place once we got home. (On my notes was a very cross record by a nurse because I didn't really want to attempt BF during the 1 hour visiting slot. Nor did I want my stiches checking or a bed bath at that time. Stupid cow.

So there's absolutely no difference between breastmilk and formula, is the general conclusion? The two are the same, and formula is more convenient hence being more popular.

So all the effort and time that I had to put in to getting breastfeeding established when my DS was in SCBU being tube-fed was literally pointless? I should have just given him formula and not bothered hand expressing colostrum? I shouldn't have bothered expressed in-between feeds for weeks to increase my supply? I really wish the midwives had told me that, and then I would have been able to rest and maybe my c section wound would have healed quicker. Do people really think that I was horribly misled by the HCPs in hospital and that all that hard work was absolutely pointless and has made no difference to my child?

I think it's genuinely agreed that the differences are on a population level silly - I've never seen anything to suggest a significant difference on an individual level for BF vs FF children, hence it could be argued that the differences are irrelevant/negligible if you don't have an interest in the wider feeding behaviours of the population.

Disappointed they really are clueless sometimes, aren't they? I wish at the time I'd realised that I could just ignore them - I was young and terrified and felt like if I didn't obey their rules DD would be taken away (severe antenatal anxiety :( ). Next time I'm going in forewarned and forearmed!

She got short shrift when she woke me at 5am to instruct me to feed (baby fast asleep, no hunger due to mucus and sore jaw from forceps). She said I "wouldn't be allowed home until they'd seen baby feeding". I told her to come back at 9am with a copy of whatever statute she thought would prevent me from waking out of the hospital then and there with my baby.

Haha I'll work on my resting bitch face for next time too then!

Or I wonder if a chimp-assisted birth is a thing, like that woman who had a dolphin-assisted birth? That way if I'm struggling to BF, I just hand the baby over to my chimp-doula like some kind of tag team? I am clearly far too tired for this now

There is a birthing method that involves letting your chimp do it (ie your biological instincts rather than your fear).

thehappywomb.com/2012/03/30/let-your-monkey-do-it-an-interview-with-ina-may-gaskin/

Disappointed I bought the self-help book based on 'what would your chimp do'!

I had no idea there was a birthing version. :o

I have to say, on thinking about it I would prefer an orangutan assisted birth, they seem much more zen.

Imagine a sloth-assisted birth? Now that would be so chilled out.

That's called Pethidine Ovaries.

I had no idea there was a birthing version

I think the birthing one came first.

Either way I have no inner chimp.

Hence the dream of getting one from the NHS due to nuclear water contamination.

I think I need Dr.Phil.

They gave me pethidine after I had a horrible reaction to the induction method that was used when having DS1.

There is a good chance I saw a sloth in the room that night.

Gas and air made me see polar bears wearing socks at the end of the bed. And I convinced myself I was giving birth in a field surrounded by goats. DP was like

Oh I'm in abject agony right now. Dear Lord, I'm going to have to give up...again