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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

PIL won't give us their house...

139 replies

JapanNextYear · 23/01/2016 13:17

www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2016/jan/22/my-parents-in-law-have-gone-back-on-a-promise-to-give-us-their-house

TLDR

pIL offered to move out of their lovely house with garden to let family living in pokey flat in London move back to Midlands. How would this have gone on AIBU?

OP posts:
tobysmum77 · 23/01/2016 13:22

Shock Grin I suspect the word 'grabby' would have featured somewhere. Unbelievable.

ohtheholidays · 23/01/2016 13:24

Oh my God she really isn't a very nice person is she.They haven't worked for 10 years yes well I'd presume that's because they're retired and they've done all they're hard slog and got they're nice home because of that.

I can't understand why if they're renting in London they don't just make the move and rent in the Midlands.

BackInTheRealWorld · 23/01/2016 13:24

I'd hope everyone would think they were being shamefully unreasonable. Especially about this bit where she is angry that they have a nice home even though they haven't worked for 10 years - completely ignoring the fact that they worked hard for the rest of their lives to pay for the house...which is something she is yet to do.
Yes it's a shame for her that the original idea didn't pan out, wouldn't we all like to be handed a house we didn't earn. But it's quite understandable for them to have second thoughts, it's a huge ask and for a such an entitled dil I'm not surprised doubts crept in.

ThenLaterWhenItGotDark · 23/01/2016 13:25

Is it my darling SIL? She is virtually measuring MIL's windows for her own curtains every time we are all there and manages to shoehorn "isn't it time you had somewhere a bit more manageable?" into the conversation at least four times each visit. Last Sunday her tack was "you really need to start paying for a cleaner to come more often.....or get somewhere smaller..."

tobysmum77 · 23/01/2016 13:26

But it's quite understandable for them to have second thoughts, it's a huge ask and for a such an entitled dil I'm not surprised doubts crept in.

Well quite not least because once they signed the house over there would have been no legal imperative for the ds/dil to actually pay their rent. So they l could end up homeless !

Sallyhasleftthebuilding · 23/01/2016 13:28

You think you've read the "lowest" and another one crawls out!!

What they do or don't do in their own time is none of her business - cheeky cow!!
"Provided them with their only grandchild" - I have provided 3 .... That's the house car and next years holiday????

MajesticSeaFlapFlap · 23/01/2016 13:29

But they have provided them with their only granchildren!

Selfish old gimmers

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 23/01/2016 13:33

*We desperately want to own our own house and start building a future and a legacy for our children.

They had a golden chance to help us, and they chose not to. I am angry at them, and ultimately I am angry at myself for believing in such an impossible dream.*

Hahahaha. Grin

DixieNormas · 23/01/2016 13:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

yankeecandle4 · 23/01/2016 13:34

I don't get this? If moving to the Midlands is so important then why don't they self fund their own move? Surely the rent/mortgage you are paying for a "stylish" London flat would go much further in the Midlands?

DixieNormas · 23/01/2016 13:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 23/01/2016 13:35

Feck. Bold fail! Another dream crushed.

TheCountessofFitzdotterel · 23/01/2016 13:38

I like the way she describes them as 'a lovely and mostly happy family '. Hmmmm.

NoArmaniNoPunani · 23/01/2016 13:40

This must be made up, surely no one would admit to feeling like this.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 23/01/2016 13:41

It's a pity Annalisa edited the letter. I'd have loved to see the "portions so lacking in sensitivity they were staggering"

MadamCroquette · 23/01/2016 13:41

It's not something she should expect at all, and she comes over as pretty unreasonable. BUT the IL's shouldn't really have said they would do this if they weren't sure. They do have a right to change their minds but it would be better not to have said it would happen in the first place.

I suppose it depends on whose idea it was - if it was the DIL's and son's idea, and they put pressure on the ILs, who felt bullied into it, then said no, then I', on the ILs' side. If it was the ILs' idea and they suggested it, then changed their minds, that would be hard to take. But still, the letter writer comes across as pretty entitled.

Bloodybridget · 23/01/2016 13:42

Friggin hell! "We gave them their only set of grandchildren" and the privilege of paying into a trust fund for them - and the bastards insist on also giving them expensive presents. WTAF!

MadamCroquette · 23/01/2016 13:42

I know, that bit is classic!

GabiSolis · 23/01/2016 13:44

Omg. This has to be fake.

Kirkenes · 23/01/2016 13:45

It this was on MN there would be accusations of troll'ing. It sounds made up to me.

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 23/01/2016 13:46

yankee but she wants their house. Doesn't it make your heart break. Grin

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 23/01/2016 13:47

Is it irony maybe? Is she trying to be Mark Steele?

MrsGentlyBenevolent · 23/01/2016 13:49

I hope this isn't real. The dil seems the type that would have her poor in-laws in a home at the slightest sign of 'old age', just to get her grabby mits on their home. Why set up home and family somewhere you can't afford? Can only imagine she's been planning this for years.

StitchesInTime · 23/01/2016 13:49

These are real people????

It sounds more like some massive wind up of a letter.

Katenka · 23/01/2016 13:50

What a dick?

It reads as though she thinks they owe her for having children. Surely she had children because she wanted them. Not to provide her pil with grandchildren.

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