Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

This mum is totally unreasonable isn't she? Help me word a reply!

540 replies

WaitrosePigeon · 21/01/2016 10:32

My son went to his friends house for a play and tea yesterday. They are both 5. They went to a local soft play.

I went to pick my son up and the husband was there, all good. Had a great time.

I text the mum to say thank you etc and I had this reply...

'No problem! They had a great time at soft play and then they had some dinner there. It came to £10.00. You can give me the money at the gates tomorrow. Have a nice evening! X'

Erm what the fuck? Is that normal? What do I do?

OP posts:
SouthWesterlyWinds · 21/01/2016 15:27

If not FB, the Wrights Stuff as someone's already pointed out. They must go through MN with a fine tooth comb for discussions.

thegiddylimit · 21/01/2016 15:28

What a cheeky mare. Some people really take the piss don't they? Don't think you did anything wrong OP, I do think sometimes people that are this cheeky (charging you for a soft play visit after you paid for Legoland is incredible) need people to push back at them otherwise they get their £10 and move onto their next victim. I wonder how many people she's done this to? Probably pay for a few Legoland visits!

LadyDeadpool · 21/01/2016 15:29

I don't usually place mark but I'm making an exception for this one Grin

fastdaytears · 21/01/2016 15:32

I wonder how far away the school is...

It will be sad if the boys' friendship is affected by this. I'd be angry but would pay up with a smile. Clearly I need to be less of a wuss!

Iggi999 · 21/01/2016 15:33

Have just looked on Facebook and agree I'm really shocked it went up. Hmm

dustarr73 · 21/01/2016 15:33

I hate people like this one rule for them,another rule for somebody else.The op was right to call her out.The only person who was rude was the woman asking for the tenner.Some people have brass necks.

KoalaDownUnder · 21/01/2016 15:34

Well, great.

I have to go to bed now. And I bet I wake up to a poxy mn notification saying 'the thread has been removed due to identifying details blah blah'.

Sad
emotionsecho · 21/01/2016 15:36

OP said earlier that the woman in question doesn't have any money or financial problems and this is why, makes everyone pay when she does something for them but doesn't pay when the roles are reversed relying on the fact that other people aren't brazen enough to ask!

MsMims · 21/01/2016 15:38

The only way the other woman would see the Facebook link would be if she too 'liked' the mumsnet Facebook page and it also popped up in her newsfeed. Or if one of her friends 'liked' or commented on the Facebook page. Not ideal but surely any post that is put on the Facebook page carries the same risk.

Leelu6 · 21/01/2016 15:38

lol, Koala

I'll screenshot it for you if you like. I charge a reasonable £1 per screenshot Wink

OlliMummy · 21/01/2016 15:38

I don't really see how this is such a big deal. If you offered to take them to legoland etc then that's your treat and it would be hypocritical to use that against the mum, since you think she should have treats your child.. In my mind she could easily have come on here and posted "aibu to think ds's friends mum should have offered to pay".. The mum was probably annoyed you didn't offer in the first place hence her text. Don't ruin your ds's friendship just because you can't get off your high horse. Yea she's being stingy but she might be equally annoyed and could have sent the text in the heat of the moment..

BicycleMadeForTwo · 21/01/2016 15:39

Good luck OP!

PersephonePitstop · 21/01/2016 15:40

Oh to be a fly on the wall in that school yard! Wink

Stardust0o0 · 21/01/2016 15:40

Frantically refreshing for an update before it gets deleted Grin

MarthasHarbour · 21/01/2016 15:41

MN have removed it from FB now Smile

Leelu6 · 21/01/2016 15:41

Olli, I think that you shouldn't accept hospitality that you can't return, so the BrazenTakerMum should not have let OP pay for LEGOLAND, meals etc if she had no intention of treating OP's child to hospitality in return.

OhSoGraceful · 21/01/2016 15:44

There is no way I would hand over the money, it's not rude to refuse, it's rude of her to ask!

I'm quite happy to be smiley & pleasant to anyone on the school run, regardless of whether they're trying to create an atmosphere. Makes it very difficult for them to continue without looking like an arse.... I think being upfront, but nice about it, causes less long term tension.

SuburbanRhonda · 21/01/2016 15:46

The mum was probably annoyed you didn't offer in the first place hence her text

But she didn't offer to pay for Legoland so why would she think others should pay when she didn't?

MNHQ
BeccaMumsnet · 21/01/2016 15:46

Huge apologies for this WaitrosePigeon. We've now deleted the Facebook post.

Leelu6 · 21/01/2016 15:49

Are LEGOLAND paying Microsoft to correct Legoland to LEGOLAND? Hmm

OohMavis · 21/01/2016 15:50

I would be wondering whether there was no original plan to have dinner out, and if my child asked/pestered for food, resulting in the mum getting a bit pissed off.

I'd be asking, at least, just to eliminate the possibility. And then returning to my catsbumface.

Seeyalater · 21/01/2016 16:00

Hope the school run isn't too awkward!! My son has just started and the etiquette stuff seems like s mine field. Perhaps we need a mumsnet guide on how to interact with other parents at school Hmm

Sonnet · 21/01/2016 16:01

AndYourBirdCanSing - I don't think anyone is disagreeing that the other woman was rude. The OP hasn't behaved badly at all but she has fanned the flames of a situation that may make her life more tricky than it needed to be for the next few years at the school gate.

Original poster
WaitrosePigeon · 21/01/2016 16:01

Sorry, we have temporary traffic lights in town and it takes ages to get past after school.

I saw mum, everything is ok.

She said I was totally right and she didn't know why she asked after all we've done with her DS. She said she's having a stressful time with her side of the family at the moment and she essentially lashed out when there was no need. It ended with a hug and all is fine. Thank fuck. I apologised for being snipey. We are going to walk the dogs in the morning so maybe I can lend and ear.

I gave her the £10 and she said she will buy us a coffee in the morning!

All is well that ends well. Sorry it took me ages! I'm glad I did send that text now or I may have built up some unnecessary resentment ... Now I just hope she hasn't seen the Facebook page....

OP posts:
pictish · 21/01/2016 16:01

I can't believe her cheek! I really want to see how this pans out.

Swipe left for the next trending thread