Wibu to 'forget' dh's food ?

[IamSantaClaus]

Dh and I have a bit of a battle with the heating in our house . I have inflammatory arthritis and tend to be more sore when it's cold. I also take beta blockers which make my hands and feet cold.

I had started setting the heat to come on at 5am so everybody isn't getting up in the freezing cold . I asked dh to set it last night and he just didn't ( deliberately ) dcs and I are now freezing.

It's a bit of a silly thing to be annoyed about but it has really annoyed me . The house takes forever to heat up.

Wibu to 'forget' the food dh likes when I do the food shopping today? Too petty?

Why do you think it was deliberate?

It was definitely deliberate , he does it quite a lot .

Was it definitely deliberate? My DH can be very forgetful at times!!

We use too much heat apparently . He does not feel the cold half as much as I do so its all well and good for him but I am just sore and frozen .

He went to turn it off last night and I asked him if he could turn it onto timed . There's no way he just forgot

Why didn't you put the timer on?

If that's the case I would talk to him about it. Surely if you have a medical condition he should understand or at least try and see it from yoyr point of view

I kind of just assumed he did it as he said 'ok' at the time .

Is it possible to set it to come on at 5am automatically? Then review the time at the weekend. I can see how it would be the kind of request that it's easy to forget, make sure ou do it ourself tonight.

Just put the timer., problem solved then. The food thing is petty and i dont see how thats linked to the heating.

Also Barbara makes a good point

You would think that but he seems more concerned about money . We're. Not rich but an extra couple of hours of heating a day , in Ireland , in winter is not going to break the bank

I think you'd not be unreasonable to forget his food but think that would just make it into a petty tit for tat, I'd be having fuming words about how sore it makes you and asking if your health is worth the extra money on heating. If it's not I'd be stopping all money related to his health (no painkillers, no dentist etc) and asking him to pack his bags.

I would set the heating myself and not buy him treats as he's obviously wanting to cut back.

I'd find that deeply hurtful. He'd rather you were in physical discomfort than pay slightly more to heat the house? Cruel.

Yes the food thing is petty but he's really annoyed me . He's well aware that I get more sore in the cold and I've a couple of doctors in my family who can back me up . He sometimes stays up later than I do and often just turns it off then

Not that this helps now, but our boiler broke last year and we had to get a new one. The new (starboard) one came with an app for your phone, so you can program the settings from anywhere.

I'm sure one of the girls at work has an app on her phone where she can set the time on her heating remotely. Could that work for you?

standard. I'm not a sailor, so no idea why my phone auto corrected that.

That would be excellent but it's quite an old oil boiler .

I don't think OP should have to skirt round the issue with apps etc, if you need heating on for your health DH should support you in that, you shouldn't have to get it sorted secretly. She has a DH problem not a 'how to program the boiler' problem!