To not want to eat food that my mother has cooked?

[Cheeseoncrumpets]

I probably am being a bit unreasonable a bit, but to put it bluntly she is shit at cooking. Everything is either frozen or out of a packet, either overcooked or undercooked, unseasoned and served on a freezing cold plate. Her roast dinners are the absolute worst though, unseasoned cremated meat, frozen Yorkshire puddings, burned roast potatoes and veg that's been stewed for about two hours smothered in thick gloopy bisto gravy. I feel sick just thinking about it.

So, she's currently in a huff with me because I don't want to go around there and eat one of her Sunday roasts. To put it into context, we usually all go out as a family together for Sunday dinner. But today she's decided she can't be bothered today's and so instead of asking us first has gone out this morning and bought a piece of beef, some veg and has announced she will be making us all lunch instead. My heart sunk as I was looking forward to a hearty Sunday meal, cooked properly in a nice pub. So I declined and said "no thanks, you know Im not a big lover of Sunday dinner" and then got in the ear because she's bought everything in for us, and she's also enquired as to why I will eat a roast in the pub but not one of hers...

So now I'm stuck. She's not good with crticism anyway so I can't really say "sorry mum but your a shit cook" without it provoking WW3.

I know it's trivial, but am I really unreasonable to not want to eat her slop cooking eveer again?

be grateful that you have a loving mum who wants to spend time with you.. i'd do near anything for that

Waitrose- would your DH care to share his tips for shamazing roasties? 😄

I'm sure he would! I'm new to mumsnet-do we private message here!?

Well you can pm but can you just pop it here? Unless he's reluctant to share lol!

I've got a question for him actually - I do a mean roastie even if I do say so myself. Parboiled, fluffed, sprinkled with semolina and then into very hot goose fat....

But they never go that lovely GOLDEN brown that you see on telly. They go brown - just a sort of dirty brown! Why is that??

It sounds like you really look down on her OP.

Nice.

He says do you turn during cooking and could you be cooking at too high a heat?

"Just a gentle offer to help with a feel felt found suggestion to change the way things are done."

Am I the only person to have read this sentence several times and still not know what it means?

Help, please!

It's one of those things that I end up sucking up (nearly literally in the case of the soggy carrots )

One of my relatives belongs to this school of cooking. She is younger than the main age group though. Other than the soggy veg, everything else has to be dry, chewy and bland. No sauces/ stuffing/ yorkshires. Just meat, potatoes and veg. One time gravy wasn't served, but fortunately there was ketchup on the table for her toddler, so I had to slather that on to my dinner in order to get enough saliva to chew the tough pork. Except it turned out afterwards that it wasn't my guess of pork, it was turkey .

The part I find hardest, is trying to cook something she deems edible as I stuggle to wantonly destroy food. We usually eat out, but it's still restrictive finding places bland enough for her to eat, with something tasty enough to be worth parting money with for us.

YANBU at all. It's depressing having a plate full of unappetising food you have to clear.

Now then Ham69 - I love my nightmares for a variety of reasons not just food parents, and was very glad when my Dad survived the stroke he had 3 days before Christmas 2 years ago, but that doesn't mean I don't want to ever have to eat his infamous yorkshire pudding/fairy cake hybrid food travisty ever again... I love him, and if he was to die, I would miss many things about him, his cooking isn't one of them.

What mysordidcakesecret said. What I would give for 5 mins chat with my mum. I'd certainly endure hellish food.

Oh fgs, can no one say anything critical about their mum without being told they're ungrateful because others have lost their mum?!

It's just a perspective and opinion leelu6. No malice, just the situation some posters are in.

Potatoface2
so you will eat mass produced roast dinners (definately frozen yorkshires and veg)) from a pub but not a home cooked roast...strange!

My dad can cook a roast dinner far better than my mum.

Just because it's home cooked does not mean it's superior to the "mass produced roast dinner" from a pub.

Mum's cooking is dire, seriously appalling, but I don't love her for her cooking, I love her for who she is. And try not to have dinner there if mum's cooking.

I'd quite like a homemade Yorkshireman, please LadyLuck.

I don't seem to be able to do yorkshires, or toad-in-the-hole either - I do get the tin as hot as I can, but I make heavy, flattish yorkshires. They do taste OK, but are not high and crispy - it is my hidden shame.

I do like frozen yorkshires - last week dh was away Tuesday-Friday, and one night I had fish fingers, Tesco finest frozen yorkshires and sweet corn for my main meal - it was lovely, and the yorkshires were delicious - crispy and tasty. I will be getting them again.

For Yorkshires I heat the oiled tin in the oven for about five minutes at GM6 then I pull out the oven shelf just far enough to pour the batter mix in without having to remove the tray from the oven.

Works every time and they don't stick either

Did you make it clear than in future you'd prefer to go to the pub as you like pub atmosphere or some other such guff and can she not buy food in before checking you want to come round in future.
Ever Sunday having lunch with parents sounds far too much for me though, I'd be looking to reduce it if she doesn't fancy eating out any more.

My mother can't cook either - I take over the cooking at her house...suits both of us - she can bake though.

I think we're related. Poor DH has put up with a lot over time, but the one Christmas lunch with my parents nearly broke his heart. Processed turkey something in a foil container (and that not enough to feed the five adults there), frozen roasties, Yorkshires, etc. Compared to his parents, a world of difference. Another person who didn't like roasts til I taught myself...

My mum's best example was when she made a roast for a family meal with visitors. Probably 8 of us in all. Stressed and martyred as she was, she got at 6 to get started. She had it ALL cooked by ten past nine, intending to keep it warm on borrowed thingies that caterers use, until 1pm. The rest of us emerged at about 8.30 to the smell of over cooked cabbage, my mum in a huff 'because no one has helped'

Never again, now I gently try and steer her to food 'that I know DS will like as he's a bit fussy' he's not, but she's not to know..

Well, my BIL adored - they all did - their very lovely mum. Misses her like mad, I'm sure. He still told my daughters a while back, with a shudder, how lucky they were to have a mother who could cook.

MIL's MIL (would now be 91) was of the culinary school that puts Christmas sprouts on to boil in November. If we go for a roast at MIL's she will go on and on about how awful GMIL's roasts used to be.

Meanwhile I'm chewing squeaky microwaved leeks and soft carrots and Just Not Getting Involved. Roasties and Yorkshires are from frozen, so I don't bother.

SIL (her daughter) makes a fantastic roast. Like us, she is crap at carving so you get lovely thick chunks instead of wafer-thin slices which don't taste of anything. And there will always be a bubbly crumble afterwards.

Maybe our children will revert to soft vegetables and hard meat.

Does it really help an OP trying to cope with a passive aggressive lunch hijack, to make her feel guilty because you miss your mother? It might be Just an Opinion, but it's not a useful one.

I'm just stunned that Op lunches every week with her folkes.

Would drive me bonkers.

Hate routines

Glad to hear you survived OP.

An elderly relative of mine has always been a great cook and still it but has started to get bouts of oddness. Whilst cooking a creamy coconut Thai curry will declare that we can have it tomorrow too after adding some pesto, we are talking tomato Sacla pesto here. After dinner I make sure it goes into the freezer without pesto for another day

My love and respect for the person cannot be judged by my desire to eat a creamy chili coconuty curry sun dried tomato dish with the odd lime leaf thrown in. I can understand not being thrilled at the prospect of awful food and it's ok to laugh about it.