to not understand people getting upset over people they don't know?

[FarterChristmoose]

Good friend, bowie fan, started crying when she heard he died,says she will miss him so much. Eh? She never met him, never even saw him at a concert. Facebook shows she's not alone in her, erm ,grief.

I find it strange that you don't understand.

U2 have been the soundtrack of my life. It's the only good memory I have with my dad. I have amazing memories of going to concerts with my mum. The music has helped me through bad times and been there for the good. Music has helped me so much. When I was mentally ill music helped me in a way I can't really explain.

Do I know Bono? No, but his music has given me so much so I will grieve when he dies. Will I grieve like I grieved when my ex died? Nope, but it will still be grief. Yes, the music will still be there, but the person who helped make it won't be and for some of us we form a connection with the artist even if we don't actually know them and those feelings are still feel very real. And I know MN hates U2 esp Bono ;)

People didn't know Bowie personally, but it's about what he represented in their lives. They felt they knew a part of him and perhaps related to him through his lyrics.

You don't have to understand it but it's stupid when people feel the need to declare they don't understand it every time a celeb dies.

I can say I've never cried over a celebrity dying or passing, I do understand why people sometimes do though for reasons such as sharing that music with someone who they lived who did pass away.

I have cried recently though over the terrorist attacks and the Syrian crisis. Those things do make me upset. Probably because I'm so helpless to do anything for them and the fact that I have kids and it upsets me that their children are dying and what they're going through.

I'm with you OP, people on here seem to cry over anyone or anything. It's weird.

Of course I'm not devastated but I am sad and yes I did cry a bit on and off yesterday.I also find it strange that people are totally unaffected when someone very famous and influential dies.

I hate the sneering that goes with this, why shouldn't we feel sadness when someone dies even if we didn't know them? Obviously you will feel far worse if it was someone that was actually in your RL but you can feel a degree of sadness if the person was more distant.

I don't know the Queen either but suspect that I shall be upset when she dies (presuming she goes before me! You never know). It is empathy, part of what being the human race is to feel that way, I think it's sad the people on here who don't feel that way about strangers dying, I'm glad I feel the way I do.

I can completely understand getting upset about it, his music touched a lot of people in a number of ways. What I never understand is when people who aren't related/close friends feel the need to take their grief into public and encroach on the mourning of the deceased persons actual friends/family i.e. the out pouring over Princess Diana and demanding that the royal family come back to London etc.

see it makes total sense to me

if a person made a major contribution to your life, whether through books, music, acting, then it is a loss. I'm not saying it's like losing your best mate, of course not. But if (random example, not actual!) Tom in HR died, while I might have seen him every day of my life the last few years, he means nothing to me. (Sorry Tom).

But the work of someone like a favourite author or singer will have done. In many cases, it will be the lens through which you saw some personal situations, it might have taught you something, it might have been the background for a major incident in your life.

perhaps it's about how much this stuff means to you - you could take lots of things out of my life but take away books and music and I wouldn't want to live. Seriously!

I'm not one to be upset when a celebrity dies, I mean it's a shame but I didn't know them personally. I'm not a very emotional person and I'm used to putting on the stiff upper lip because I don't like others to know my emotions but I get that it's not the same for other people, music is a big part of people's memories and if you listened to a specific musician during some tough times then I think it can be upsetting when they die. I wouldn't post it on FB though - I can't see the point of FB anyway and rarely post anything on there.

I Agree Op. I think it is sad when anyone dies but I do find it difficult to understand why anyone would cry over a celebrity dying. Everyone is entitled to their own grief but I personally have don't get anymore sad about a celebrity dying than anyone else

What I don't understand is that the same people don't give a flying fuck about other very distressing things, or other people being emotional/hurt over actual pressing sitations in their lives.

So it's not like they're exquisitely sensitive people or something.

i thought his death was honourable, poignant and emotional. i thought he was an extraordinary person (to quote the Archbish) and felt shocked by the sudden announcement and very sad that he is dead. i have never met him and too young really to have been a super fan.

Judging by the rolling news, Facebook, twitter and the school playground many many people felt the same. thats amazing isn't it? to feel loss together. What's WRONG with that. i don't like mawkish public grieving either but this feels genuine. Even people who aren't really fans can react to the death of an artist. Its called community, society, humankind.

I think for some people music is just background noise, something that plays in in cafés and shopping centres. For other people music is central to their lives. The people who go about their lives not really noticing music are never going to understand why other people have such attachments to bands and artists.

A friend of mine was very upset when Tommy Ramone, the last of The Ramones, died. The Ramones changed his life when he was 13 years old, and set him on a path to becoming a professional musician himself.

So you don't get upset, others do!
If the singer from my favourite band died i would be devestated. Ive loved them for over 15 years.
Their Songs have helped me through hards times and i've travelled to see them multiple times.

If people are upset over the death of bowie, that is their right, noone should tell them they shouldn't be.

just to say, I'm not a fan of mawkish grief either but I'm not on Facebook so perhaps haven't seen any mawk!

I "don't get" a lot of things about people in general.

People on here get awfully het up over stuff that others consider inconsequential.

Such is life. It would be very dull if we were all the same and all reacted to things in the same way.

element funnily enough I've cried about Syria, Paris, Tunisia, Egypt etc. Very distressing things so yes of course I can be empathic and upset about a myriad of stuff happening in the world.

srsly I agree that FB and even sympathetic threads on forums like this are comforting, yes community and humankind. You feel sad and it is comforting to know that other people feel the same.

Of course I didn't cry yesterday in front of anyone but I did on my own at home and in the car with some of his best tunes at top volume.

It's how it's done, I suppose.

I was really saddened to hear of David Bowie dying; he was a fantastic artist, and his death from cancer brought back memories of my mum dying from the same disease at a slightly younger age. Both of them had a lot more to offer in their lives, and it was easy to imagine how hard the last few months had been for him and his family. I liked the fact that Facebook was full of Bowie songs and RIPs, it seemed respectful.

However, I can't understand the people who turn an understandable grief - mourning the public figure if you like - into a very personal thing. I wouldn't claim that David Bowie was my 'best friend' - I never met him.

I saw it with Mum as well when she died- random people in the neighbourhood claiming that she was 'the best friend they'd ever had' - which was either very sad (your best friend is someone you've only ever said hello to?) or not entirely true....

I can fully understand people feeliing sad/having a sense of loss/sentimental feelings when someone they are a fan of dies. What I never understand is complete devastation, public wailing/sobbing/ traveling miles and sitting outside the church at funerals for someone they have never met. The whole Diana thing was an example of this- how can you possibly feel this much for someone you've only ever seen on TV?

Im with a lot of previous posters here- I think people cry over celebrities when they have significant memories that involve their work, and often it is quite easy to feel close to someone because you relate to their work very strongly.

People are entitled to cry, or not cry, over whoever or whatever they want. It has no real impact on anyone else, other than themselves. Everyone experiences things differently, especially grief. Often people who grieve more openly or more frequently are characterised as a bit wet, and a bit pathetic- I think that's really sad. I think being empathetic and sensitive is a wonderful trait.

I cried when Todd died on Neighbours. I also cried when I discovered we were out of cheese recently. I'm not particularly a "crier", either.
I wouldn't read too much into your mate having a bit of a sob.

I normally feel similar OP and have rolled my eyes in the past as public grieving or whatever you call it and when friends went to Libdon for Diana's funeral. But, i was gutted and shocked when i heard it on the radio yesterday and shed a few tears when listening to Space Oddity on the radio. Bowie is one if my favourites, started listening to him when i was about 12 - years ago. Just hard to think he is gone.

Please stop calling David Bowie a 'celebrity'. Ta ever so.

Another, I must admit, if someone I knew cried because they were out of cheese, I would worry that they were crying about something else.....

I go to a lot of funerals of people I've never met (dm is a minister, i do the ipod for music/hymns) and have shed a tear a few times. I'm not usually a cryer, but sometimes the sense of loss and upset is so great I can't help it. I find it quite embarrassing to be sniffling over someone who had literally no bearing on my life, usually someone who's name didn't even know until 20 minutes before arriving at church. But the way I look at it is grief/loss/sadness is one of those emotions you can't predict, it hits yiu when you least expect it sometimes.

Dh was gobsmacked about David Bowie, he was a fan. It hasn't really affected me, I only really know him from being I the beginning of 'the snowman' from when I was tiny and scaring the bejeesus out of me in Labrynth. But if a person has made an impact on you, it's a shock when they die, and I can understand the upset.

(I may not make sense, trying to coral 4 dogs)

Mrs, I also hate it when singers/actors/musicians/writers etc are called "celebrities". To me a sleb is someone from Big Brother or some such.

The Diana thing was an odd phenomenon. I doubt that your average Bowie fan was wailing outside Buckingham palace when that happened.