to not understand people getting upset over people they don't know?

[FarterChristmoose]

Good friend, bowie fan, started crying when she heard he died,says she will miss him so much. Eh? She never met him, never even saw him at a concert. Facebook shows she's not alone in her, erm ,grief.

[Sparklingbrook]

YABU. I CBA to explain why.

[squoosh]

wiccamum a few weeks ago my Dad told me Thom Yorke had died. Well he actually told me the lead singer of 'something head' had died. I asked him if he meant Radiohead and he said yes. Once I'd found out he actually meant Lemmy he was all 'Motorhead, Radiohead....such silly names these bands have'.

[hefzi]

Unresolved grief issues from elsewhere in their lives. You're welcome

[WoodHeaven]

I don't think you 'know' artists. You know whatever they allow you to see, incl that tiny part of their soul they put into their music (That's for the ones who DO write their own music. there aren't that many of them).
But you have no idea of who they actually are. (It's hard enough to know people you see everyday!) Just look at how often we discover a side of their personality we didn't know and then look shocked.

I do think some people are grieving for an image they had in their head of who xx is. Usually a very idealised version.
What is interesting is that ot also work with people that we 'know' as see as 'bad'/entitled/awful etc still wo having any idea of who they are apart from what their PR company let us see. And some people will feel totally OK to comment that it's not such a loss that he/she died anyway.

[squoosh]

I think there's something about Bowie as a solo artist that makes his death seem bigger somehow. When Lennon died there was always McCartney and when McCartney dies he will still be spoken about as part of Lennon and McCartney, part of the Beatles. But with Bowie it all rests with him.

[liz70]

"YABU. I CBA to explain why."

This x infinity. I've been through this in the past and after a while I find it pointless to try to explain to those that don't get it. You just end up repeating yourself.

[wiccamum]

Oh squoosh!!! If someone had done that to me, well I can't imagine! I caught the first line of your comment and before I could completely read it I felt sick....for a split second I thought "shit, I know he's not a household name, but did I miss something big?!" deep calming breaths

[PrimalLass]

www.scotsman.com/glasgow/kelvingrove-museum-organist-s-david-bowie-tribute-is-viral-hit-1-3998718

[squoosh]

Oh sorry wicca. It's my dad's fault!

Have a brandy

[BeautyQueenFromMars]

I don't recall there being a thread like this when Rik Mayall died and people were upset...

I'm not usually a crier when people I don't know personally die. For example, I felt it was sad when RM died, but I didn't feel a sense of loss at all. When I heard about David Bowie though, I cried on and off for about half an hour. The difference between the two is that RM had no influence in my life, whereas David Bowie did. I have/had a lot of liking and respect for the latter, and am a little in love with his King Jareth character. He's always been in my life.

Compassion and empathy are never bad things.

[wiccamum]

Phew, thank you Squoosh...yes, blame your dad, we Radiohead fans are a very delicate bunch x

[squoosh]

Life on Mars sounds ACE on that organ!

[GiddyOnZackHunt]

I wasn't a Bowie fan but several close friends are. I get them being sad as music is an emotional thing. I'm another one who did shed a tear at Terry Pratchett's death. I played Teenage Kicks very loudly when John Peel died.
But JP and TP were part of my life, talking on the radio and through books. I couldn't get worked up about a royal or a sleb

[Ragwort]

I suppose my answer to Moonrise is 'no, I can't say that any music, book,painting' etc really moves me 'emotionally'. I love reading and enjoy many books but if my favourite author died I would be mildly sad (for their family mainly) but I wouldn't be overwhelmed with grief.

I can recall the outpouring of grief when Diana died and thought it was ridiculously OTT - I do find it a little odd that people can react so strongly over the death of someone they have never met but you don't get the same sense of communal outpouring of emotion for some of the truly atrocious things that are happening in our society today.

[Jasonandyawegunorts]

but you don't get the same sense of communal outpouring of emotion for some of the truly atrocious things that are happening in our society today.

of course you do.

[hefzi]

Draylon you're absolutely right: I was being glib

[PrimalLass]

Life on Mars sounds ACE on that organ!

Doesn't it just.

[wiccamum]

Oh Giddy, I remember the exact moment I heard John Peel had died, broke my heart. His voice was like a warm hug from the radio....God bless that lovely man.

[WoodHeaven]

liz I hope you will never be in the situation where you have to to ask someone to explain something personal to you.
You know like parents of dcs with SN have to explain how hard it can be to get support in school, parents of dcs with autism have to explain why their dc acts the way they do. Or someone with a chronic illness (lets' say endometrisois, trigelmia neuralgia, ME and some some not as well know auto immune conditions).
Because all these people spend years of their lives explaining. Actually a lot of them spend a lot of time on MN explaining for the sake of all of us understanding.
I'm sure you can spare a few lines to explain too.

Because I can't understand. It's a completely foreign feeling for me. I'm not expecting to change (I hope you don't expect me to either) but knowing what it means to you might help me be more compassionate instead.
I have songs that bring feelings to me, stronmg ones. They have meaning. But I don't feel anythigf special for them atv all. No more than I would for a well known author.

[liz70]

"Life on Mars sounds ACE on that organ!"

Doesn't it just? dh played it last night; I wish I'd been there now, but I think it would have been a push, if not impossible, to get back on the bus to pick up DD3.

[Jasonandyawegunorts]

WoodHeaven people have explained, if you don't get it you Won't get it, simple really.

[Obs2016]

I don't get it either. Diana or anyone else, I just don't 'get'.
So bad you are sobbing all day and can't go to work? Just beyond my comprehension I guess.

[SilverOldie2]

To those who think us non-sobbers are heartless etc because we don't show our emotions in that way it doesn't mean that these events have no effect on us because of course they do. One can feel empathy, sadness, a feeling of loss without crying about someone none (or 99.999%) of us have never met.