to think this is an extremely angry reaction?

[mikado1]

I will first of all admit to having a very annoying habit of having a glass of water almost constantly at the side of the couch so I can drink whole feeding ds2. Anyway I am upstairs with DCS, OH downstairs and I hear him shouting 'fucking cunt, what a fucking place to leave a glass of water'..having obviously knocked it. I hate cursing but especially that word. Aibu to be quite disgusted? Little things like this really annoy him.

It's not the choice of words per se that bother me, or the swearing (I swear and say fuck quite a bit and cunt a little bit), it's that "fucking cunt", said in aggressively or enraged manner, was clearly aimed at the OP. That's my take too. Don't care about swearing. I very much care about being sworn at.

Lord alive! He was calling the glass of water a fucking cunt.

I called our sofa a fucking cunning bastard the other day because I stubbed my toe on it. I don't understand how it is being interpreted as being directed at the OP.

So he was saying the glass of water left a glass of water in that place, user?

If he was calling you a fucking cunt then that's completely unacceptable. If he was referring to the glass then I'd still be unhappy as it seems like a massive over reaction.

No. He said Fucking cunt. What a place to leave a glass of water.

He didn't accuse the glass of water of anything.

I'm not sure where the confusion comes from

I call inaminate objects a fucking cunt all the time when they get in my way. There are no other adults living here & the item has probably been left there myself or by the kids (feckin lego) - doesn't mean I'm calling my DCS cunts, in fact it's usually when it's just me in the house and I'm most likely calling myself a cunt for doing it

He could have been calling op a fucking cunt.
He could have been calling himself one.
Or the water glass.
Or using it in the same way as fucking hell.

Either way none of us know and the op has to decide for herself. If he isn't a name callers in general I wouldn't assume he was calling her a cunt.

I wouldn't appreciate it being in the kids earshot though. Agree water bottle is better.

I know where you are coming from.

I find angry swearing very aggressive and uncomfortable.

Dh just swears because he is sweary.

He only does that sort of thing if he is really super stressed and sleep deprived though. .it's a big sign to me that things are getting on top of him.

OOPS sorry wrong thread. This thread is very reasonable. .

Why are there so many wo/men excusing this man's abusive behaviour ?

Thanks for replies...Unfortunately the (sometimes extreme) opinions, together with reaction here when I brought it up, just leaves me unsure. To clarify, yes, it has happened before and yes I have a sports bottle. Also no, I didn't actually think he was talking 'to' me but bit was the anger and the swearing that unnerved me. I find that really aggressive. I said it to him and said ds1 could have been there and he agreed but it was clear he didn't think it was a big deal. More cursing and slamming doors yesterday because I had eaten 2/5 bars of chocolate kept for baking. Again, yes annoying but plenty left, I always replace and he wasn't about to bake. Meanwhile I succumbed because I am constantly exhausted (bf baby and zero quality sleep) and chocolate feels necessary at times. ItsNotDarkYet yes, you're right, I have posted about a few different situations.tbh feel drained and numb thinking above it all

More cursing and slamming doors yesterday because I had eaten 2/5 bars of chocolate kept for baking. Again, yes annoying but plenty left, I always replace and he wasn't about to bake. That is wrong on so many levels.

What do you want to do?

Do you feel he fits this description of The Demand Man, mikado? Or even the Terrorist - a bit of both, perhaps?

I've not searched your threads, but you do seem ground down by these continual irrational rampages :(

Why are there so many wo/men excusing this man's abusive behaviour?

Swearing at a spilled glass of water isn't abusive behaviour. If you're answering the OP and only the OP, there is nothing abusive about it. If you're talking about backstory and further info, thats a very different matter, but don't accuse posters of excusing behaviour that we have no knowledge of

I call many inanimate objects cunts.
Or cunting things.
Usually the printer and Henry.

Well, Viola, now you do know, what is your take on it?

Still think it's OK?

Mikado- maybe start a thread in relationships. Yes, they might tell you to leave him, but you certainly won't find many apologists for his nasty misogynistic language, or behaviour.

i always shout and swear when i knock stuff over. Or if i hurt myself.

I think we all do Bran.

I just think it's a big stretch to even begin to presume a man, having knocked over a glass of water left there by a woman, and then saying "stupid cunt" is referring to the glass of water.

Sorry, "fucking cunt, what a fucking place to leave a glass of water".

If there is back story then it's a different matter, but those words? I said almost the exact same thing the other day when I trod on an electrical plug. I yelled 'Fucking twat. Stupid place to leave that'. Only I live alone. I knew it was me who had done it. I don't actually think I'm a fucking twat. I wasnt calling myself one. It doesn't necessarily mean that in this instance the DP was talking about anyone at all.

Cunt wasn't a word my family used, now it's slipped itself in and everyone uses it. I mean my dh, brother, sister, parents and I. Not my dd haha. It's just a word. I called the cat it other day as he knocked his bowl all over the floor being a greedy bastard and not letting me finish putting his dinner out. I find it better to scream and get the anger out and then go into dh and dd in a pleasant, anger free mood. It usually involves something being broken also. I have anger issues. I should address them...

So he shouted at you for eating 2/5th of a bar of chocolate?

He's a controlling, aggressive arse by the sounds of it.

Sorry thenlaterwhenitgotdark for getting your name so wrong!! :/

're the chocolate -again, it's a thing I tend to do and it's not to do with it being chocolate but that it's eating into supplies-like if I was doing a spag bol and he'd used the tins of tomatoes. Except I am addicted dependent on chocolate and if baby sleeping for five mins that's the only stash. I have said to him before to put it somewhere I can't find it and I see now he has. But it is the anger and the grumpines that grinds me down. He has taken the dc out for a half hour and to say he was joyless heading off is an understatement. Really makes me sad. He does a lot around the house and I know he is tired too. I know they will tell me to ltb if I post in relationships so I am going to try to talk, yet again, tonight, before doing that. I wish they did at home counselling because don't know how will manage it.