Do you know any misogynistic women?

[ovaryhill]

I've been reading a bit about this and wondered how common it is.
Has anyone had any experience of this?
I know at least one woman who behaves as if she hates other women and is very derogatory about women in general, agrees that wearing short skirts means you're asking for trouble kind of thing, sees other women as a threat and would prefer to work for men
Any opinions or experience?

Low intelligence? How insulting. There's misogyny right there!

AF was only referencing the poster she was talking ti, who said that she never got on with women and all men had wanted to use her. Read the thread.

Do women teachers only talk about who is a bitch and what they are cooking for tea? Seriously? Some of the reasons given in that post are exactly what I mean. Only men are farmers and enjoy talking about real stuff whereas the women talk about cooking.

The priest at my local Catholic Church has girls as altar servers.
He said that he had been criticised by mostly female parishioners for this.

Yes - my boss in my first 'proper' job. I think with hindsight that she hadn't reached the stellar heights in her career that she expected and was resentful of young women at the start of their career, but at the time it was awful. Completely different standards for men and women covering everything from timekeeping, behaviour at work, behaviour on nights out. It was awful. Strong women were 'aggressive and shrill', men were 'just wanting to put their point across'. Tipsy man on an Xmas night out rolling in late was 'boys will be boys', women were 'giving the wrong impression'. She was a nightmare to work for and almost made me rethink my career. Fortunately my next boss (also a woman) was far far better.

In general I avoid misogynists wherever possible, but I do still see plenty of low level internalised misogyny from relatives (like the whole expecting DP to pay / go to the bar example, even though it's a joint account )

Do women teachers only talk about who is a bitch and what they are cooking for tea? Seriously? Some of the reasons given in that post are exactly what I mean. Only men are farmers and enjoy talking about real stuff whereas the women talk about cooking.
You didn't read my post. I meet farmers of both sexes and we talk about farming. The PE/primary teachers I met were mainly women and we talked about PE. However I often felt uncomfortable in an all female staffroom where there was ongoing nastiness about other members of staff. I don't really enjoy small talk or nastiness.

kurt RTFT

I was specifically responding to a particular poster who had already said that men she had known only seemed interested in for sex

in her

oh, and lass you read RTFT too

and in fact, I am the only fucking poster that has acknowledged what that poster said and tried to sympathise with how she felt

did nobody else notice how she said reading this thread had made her feel like shit ? Before i responded to her, I might add

So fuck off with picking up on what I said and look to your own responses.

and thanks wits btw

I have some friendships with men but they are much more superficial. I am certainly a "woman's woman"

I have - I don't think that's much better. Some women and some men are worthwhile as friends; both sexes are equally capable of being boring and unengaging.

Lass, are there any more quotes you want to lift from my posts before you are done ?

How about you discuss your own experience without reference to mine ? It's very lazy discourse you are practicing there.

Just thought of another one that comes up a lot (have read it on here). A successful woman must have slept with someone to achieve her success. Nothing to do with just being good at her job or working hard ,then. Would anyone ever say that about a man?
The one that pisses me off the most, though, is the one about 'marriage equals prostitution'.

I have already set out my experience.

I don't choose my friends based on their sex and close friends area 50/50 split. A self declared " man's woman" or "a woman's woman " are both setting out pre-determined criteria which I am likely to fail.

A successful woman must have slept with someone to achieve her success. Nothing to do with just being good at her job or working hard ,then. Would anyone ever say that about a man?

The alternative to having slept her way to success is she must have been man pleasing in some other way or playing a man's game.

Well, depending which part of the definition of misogynist you use, "a person who dislikes, despises, or is strongly prejudiced against women."

If I use 'strongly prejudiced' then almost everyone I know, even if they don't realize it.

I'm doing an MA in Women's and Gender Studies. I think it's fair to say that I'm pretty committed to the ideals of equality. I'm also a teacher. Even without meaning to, I sometimes treat male and female children differently. Whenever I catch myself on this I pull myself up on it, but so much of the stuff is totally ingrained that it's hard to even see when we do it.

OTOH, my sister is VERY happy to let her husband have complete control of the house, while she makes her teenage DDs take him his dinner and a drink.

both sexes are equally capable of being boring and unengaging. Lass please don't stray off topic.

Both sexes are equally capable of talking endlessly on boring subjects (they may well be both intelligent, charming and engaging). I find those that do are very happy to go along with the gender norm and if this is questioned will become sexist and misogynistic.

derxa
A lot of it on MN. A lot of hatred directed at other women.

Misogyny is "hatred because of being a woman" not "hatred at/towards a woman" - it is possible that "hate" is directed because of differences of opinions between two parties, and not because of the way the recipient was born.

It is not simply "hate received by a woman".

I was specifically responding to a particular poster who had already said that men she had known only seemed interested in for sex
...
did nobody else notice how she said reading this thread had made her feel like shit ?

Thanks AF
I was wildy oversimplyfying in my original comment tbh. I think I find it hard making friends of either sex, it's just that men maybe have made more effort and got to know me a bit better. But so many have turned out to have had other intentions to start with. This has generally come up a long way down the line of friendship, often someone else telling me "Oh he used to really like you" type thing.

Others I wonder, especially a friend who I lost recently due to his very controlling partner who controls who he's allowed to see - female friends being top of the banned list. I don't know if he stopped bothering because I was no longer the closest female and it wasn't pure friendship on his part, or if he's just trapped in an abusive relationship. We were friends for years and used to talk about all sorts of interesting things, politics and humanity mainly, I really miss him.

I would really love to make some female friends, it's just quite hard because they all seem to have loads of friends already! MN is the first place I've felt I really fit in with a bunch of women, but obvs not real life. Although this thread isn't a great example! It seems strange that posters on here happily calling other posters unintelligent, or ignoring a poster who feel shit (myself) at the general tone, have plenty of female friends... Doesn't do much to negate the claim that women form bitchy cliques!

Referring to the sleeping your way to the top comment, I had an ex colleague who openly admitted she would have no qualms at all about doing this
She felt if a man was stupid enough to promote or pay her more just because of a bit of sex them she would take full advantage
I'm still not sure whether to be impressed or horrified!

I think there is another element to the 'I get on better with men' statement. Because women are so heavily socialised, it's more common in female groups for the status quo to be rigidly enforced - so who fits in, who doesn't etc, whereas male groups are commonly more relaxed about that, and individual differences not a big deal.

So if you're a woman that's not great at fitting in, male groups can be brill.

MIL.

I would probably be classed as a mysogynist. I don't actually hate other women but I do tend to mistrust them, due to many years of past experience. Although one of my bosses is female I would prefer to work only for men as have had several female bosses and it wasn't a good thing.

I admit that I have retaliated in some situations but have done so without a twinge of conscience. I know not all men are great but I guess I'm less likely to assume the worst without any evidence.

I don't have low intelligence though.

I'm another who often gets on better with men.

In general, and I fully accept that I'm generalising here, I find men more straightforward and direct than women, both socially and professionally.

As an example, if men congregated around school gates, you would find groups of blokes chatting about football or cars, rather than the cliquiness which sometimes happens with groups of women.

I get on better with gay men than straight ones. I dread to think what this says about me.

Mainly I think it's because I don't feel "threatened" as in if they are nice to me it's not because they want to get into my pants but because they mean it. I much prefer going out to gay bars than straight bars because I've never had anyone be..how can I put this - make me feel uncomfortable with their intentions. You know, no grabbing my arse, sliding hands up my skirt or insisting they buy me a drink when I've politely said I don't want one.

Obviously I do realise that not all men behave like that but into personal experience a fair few of them do. I don't see myself as über attractive either just youngish and sort of ok looking so it isn't that.

I really do feel a lot of men still do view women as little more than sex objects which makes me sad.
Not all men thank god as I have some lovely male friends that absolutely do not.