Do you know any misogynistic women?

[ovaryhill]

I've been reading a bit about this and wondered how common it is.
Has anyone had any experience of this?
I know at least one woman who behaves as if she hates other women and is very derogatory about women in general, agrees that wearing short skirts means you're asking for trouble kind of thing, sees other women as a threat and would prefer to work for men
Any opinions or experience?

I worked with one - she was just awful.

Really competitive with other women, especially if she saw you as a threat. A manipulative liar who would fawn over all the men - regardless of their position in the company.

Very prone to the "I just get on better with men" line and branded all women according to their attractiveness. Being fat was the biggest no-no - she was repulsed by it.

She did really well, because she was very, very good at networking with the right men who were entirely hoodwinked.

Possibly one of the most genuinely unpleasant people I have ever come across. She made me shudder.

Aargh, yes, I completely meant to make a point about geese thought processes . Honking and thinking skills, clearly, damn autocorrect.

Babsandmoo are the "get on better with men" brigade giving sweeping reasons as to why or just saying it's one of those weird things?

But those of you saying you get on better with men...what traits do entire sexes share? It genuinely bewilders me.

My mum is simply awful.

Some of her key phrases are:
"Feminism has gone too far"
"Women make terrible managers"

Also states that "she prefers the company of men" (which is funny because they don't seem to prefer the company of her.)

My mum she knows men are the more violent sex but women cause just as much if not more harm through their scheming and manipulative ways. My nanny had a similar view but constantly told me never tie yourself down to a man and children be free and do what you want to do so very conflicting and unusual for her age group

Surprised at some of my friends remarks at times always pointing out men suffer too and that women can be just as awful and violent as men

Most of my aunts and some colleagues (psychotherapists/counsellors I would expect to have more self awareness but that is not always the case)

Oh yes my mum blames feminism for going too far should the feminist movement change it's aims to women having a few more rights but still not seen as equal so men feel more comfortable powerful

Bubs Hint to the "I get on better with men" brigade (and I used to say the same) - you're making sexist statements just by implying that people have certain qualities/personalities purely by virtue of their sex. Try treating everyone as people rather than seeing them as men/women and assuming things based on that.

Er, I do treat everyone as people. I'm just observing based on my experience so far. I don't assume anything, as mentioned I have met women I 'click' with, it just doesn't seem to happen very often.

It isn't linked to low intelligence, at all.

My youngest DD, has genuine low intelligence, as do her peer groups, I've worked with people with LDs and medical low intelligence, oddly these groups aren't coming out with this claptrap.

A lack of critical thinking skills, or not wanting to critically think, because they've found a way of coping with life/low esteem etc, is more accurate and explains most bigotry.

I've met highly intelligent women who have a hatred of other women and there have been enough examples, of this, shown in the writing of female Psychiatrists and Psychologists etc.

My Nana lost her husband at 40 so supported herself and her children and took no nonsense from any man she was a fantastic woman a great role model for me I dont understand why my mum has the views she has its strange. Mum took me aside on a family holiday a few years ago and asked if my Dh could pay for drinks at dinner as I had offended my step dad because i paid so of course next time it was our turn i declared I WILL PAY.

Actually my last comment wasn't entirely true. I don't treat everyone completely equally any more. I feel quite alone that I don't really have female friends I see, especially with regards to someone nderstanding feminist issues, and I am quite wary of men nowadays.

I feel like I must be deficient as a person - women don't want to know me and men only want sex, type thing. So please be careful blaming me for my observation that I seem to get on better with men. God I feel shit now.

I worked in a majority women environment and I heard it said frequently by them if there were any arguments or disagreements that as it's an all women environment it's bound to be "bitchy." There is this stereotype that big groups of women are bitchy but I just think there is going to be back biting within any large group of people. I've known plenty of male "bitches", in fact they're sometimes the worst offenders but they're never called "bitchy". Actually though, I think for the most part we all got on very well and supported each other.

My sister shocked me when I found out my boyfriend at the time had filmed me having sex with him without my consent. She couldn't see what the problem was and said, "so? He's your boyfriend." Erm, that doesn't mean he owns me or can do things without my consent. She still couldn't see why I was upset and basically told me I was massively over reacting. Even my mum, who classes herself as a feminist, came out with the "it's what men do" claptrap which I think I would find offensive as a man. It's pretty much saying oh well, he has a penis of course that means he must act like an arsehole! I genuinely worry for my nieces and the kind of advice my family will be giving them when they start having relationships.

But those of you saying you get on better with men...what traits do entire sexes share? It genuinely bewilders me.

It baffles me that you think that's the conclusion. People aren't claiming they'd be best buds with all men. I'd rather pull my eyes out then hang out with many of the "hubbys" and DHs mentioned on MN. But when I click with people and a friendship develops it's more often with a man than a woman. Harder and more painful to understand is that when I do feel I click with a woman it often struggles to become a friendship. That could be because I'm of an age now where women are socially very busy and feel they have enough friends.

What arfarfanarf said.

""The bullshit women face is perhaps only revealed in full when you're no longer young and pretty and you realise a lot of the attention you got from men back then was 100% sexual""

I think that's unfair. We don't all have the same start in life and it's often only when women get older, they gain the confidence to learn, question and challenge their own families Norm and 'the way things are'.

I was an idiot in my 20's, I was still recovering from my abusive childhood, as well. I started to change in my 30's, I also was Widowed and experimented with my sex life, which as a woman, I've been judged and isolated (by some) for. Unlike the Men, I've had sex with. The hatred and contempt directed at the Woman your having sex with, is rarely challenged, when men are spouting shit in pubs.

I'm trying to explain to younger women why they shouldn't use, Slag etc, but you're looked at strange. I've done the same when 'Christmas cleaning' stuff has come up on FB, but depressingly the Woman is at fault, if the windows aren't sparkling, even if she works/has caring responsibilities.

I actually do get on better with men. I am not a misogynistic though.

I don't think women are less likeable than men, not at all, but I do seem to build up friendships with men much more easier than most women. I do see people as just people and don't think men or women fit into boxes with certain traits, but my experience is that men are more likely to click with me. That is not sexist, no matter how much someone wants it to be.

Yes, my stepmother. She once referred to her own granddaughter, a five year old girl as a little bitch - among other things.

Mind you, she's married to my father who thinks women are nothing more than domestic appliances, on a par with white goods.

I don't spend a lot of time with them.

I don't want it to be sexist, I just don't get it. All women are different and all men are different. That's all.

Yes, my own mum is very critical of other women. She thinks a lot of rape victims probably "asked for it" by wearing revealing clothes and walking alone late at night. She is suspcious of the victims of historic sexual abuse cases, usually saying things like "why didn't they report it years ago if it really happened?", that kind of thing. She is very critical of women in a way she isn't of men, and doesn't really have any close female friends anymore.

Personally im very wary of women who say they get on better with men and that other women are always nasty to them, as I usually find that they are the ones with the problem.

I agree it is not about low intelligence. It is hard to escape negative messages that we are given from a young age

I still have to pull myself up at times as I have had these message all my life but once you are aware it's hard to ignore to block but there are reasons why some women do it's complex and individual

Loads of women are mysogynistic, but I don't think it comes from active hatred. It's just that was part of the culture (and still is, to some extent).
One example, off the top of my head, my Mum wasn't happy about women vicars . Apparently men were better leaders. Did she really think that women couldn't perform the job of 'vicar' or had she been indoctrinated from birth to believe that men were the leaders in church and women took a backseat subordinate role. Religion has an awful lot to answer for, IMO.
I do remember one little gem from my mum. She disliked trouser suits for women, because it made them appear 'aggressive' like female businesswomen. She preferred to wear skirts and dresses all the time because they were more 'feminine' and couldn't understand why I wore trousers nearly all the time (because they're comfortable and practical).

I don't get it either witsender

I would love a group of female friends. There might be a reason for it, perhaps I act a certain way around women that I don't around men.

Perhaps it's something as simple as I am more likely to compare myself to other females negatively and give off an air of insecurity. I don't know if this is the case or not but it is probably something I am doing, but I most certainly don't hate women. I would love more of them in my life.

I shouldn't disparage my Mum too much though. She also had 5 children and went out, retrained and worked full time as soon as she was able to, in the 1970's. My dad was very controlling though so I think that was also a factor in her outlook.

I have lost count of the number of women who tell me they'd rather work for a male boss than female because women in management are bossy/irrational/bitchy.