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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate Pandora?

92 replies

pleasedontopenpandorasbox · 26/12/2015 09:25

A few years ago my MIL and SIL clubbed together to buy me a Pandora bracelet. They have since bought me a handful of charms for it every birthday and on the birth of my children. I never wear it apart from when they get me a new charm. DH knows it isn't me and has mentioned it but any comment is seen as criticism and feelings are hurt.

2 years ago for DD's first Christmas they bought her a simple silver bracelet and had it engraved with her name and dob. Fair enough it can be a nice keepsake but I don't think she needs to be wearing jewellery.

Yesterday her main present was, you've guessed it, a Pandora bracelet and charm. I now envisage years of charm buying and money wasting on pointedly filling it up.

I wouldn't mind as much if we didn't have give MIL several hundred pounds per month so she doesn't lose her home following a messy divorce.

I just hate them and think the money could be better spent on things my DD needs but AIBU considering MIL and SIL are allowed buy whatever they want?

OP posts:
Original poster
pleasedontopenpandorasbox · 26/12/2015 09:26

**Pointlessly although pointedly might equally be true Grin

OP posts:
ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 26/12/2015 09:27

Yanbu. Maybe tell them it's full?

80sMum · 26/12/2015 09:28

YANBU!

Cookingongas · 26/12/2015 09:33

Yanbu.

But I can understand why they buy them. They never have to put actual thought into a gift again.

glitterinmyeyes · 26/12/2015 09:37

YANBU but why don't you just put DD's bracelet away somewhere and tell them it's being kept safe for when she's old enough to wear it? They might have got bored of it by the time she's bigger. If not, just don't put it on her when you go out to see them and say you forgot or you didn't want it to get damaged.
They're not to everyone's tastes but I think the sentiment is there. I guess it's just a good way for some people to remember special events.

Boomingmarvellous · 26/12/2015 09:37

Gifts are gifts. It would be very hurtful to say you don't like their presents, so just put it in a drawer and sell it when they are not around to object. If you say it's full they might just buy one for the other wrist Grin

Ninkynonkrinkydonk · 26/12/2015 09:37

My mum constantly buys me expensive jewellery that isn't my taste that I never get to wear. I feel bad that she wastes her money on something I don't appreciate and I've tried to convince her to spend her money on herself or to just get me a token present and I don't need expensive stuff, but she ignores me. I don't have the heart to tell her I don't like it because she seems so pleased with herself.

Not v helpful sorry!

Enjolrass · 26/12/2015 09:43

I h a a charm bracelet. No Pandora buy one one mum has been buying bits for.

It's not really me. I never wear it. But I love it and wouldn't part with it. Personally I think Yabu, your dd may love it when she is older.

The one for you is different as you don't like it. Maybe drop hints about how it's full and you love the ones you have so much you wouldn't be swapping them about.

Or get your dh to make a different suggestion next year. 'She has loads of those, I know she would prefer xyz, this year'

DyslexicScientist · 26/12/2015 09:44

Yanbu. I don't get it, they seem to have sprung up everywhere and make people waitoutsude to buy it.

Seems very overpriced and not at all unique.

Elizabeth Duke replacement?

Cimcardishan · 26/12/2015 09:45

I find Pandora tacky and ubiquitous, the new Links

IcecreamBus · 26/12/2015 09:50

I think people think it will make a wonderful gift because it seems to be the thing to have at the moment. Yanbu though. To know exactly what I'm getting every occasion (unless I really loved it) would be a tad disappointing.

I really do prefer nice one off pieces by some small jewellery designer than something everyone else has to have.

DisappointedOne · 26/12/2015 09:52

YANBU OP. I dislike pandora too.

A close relative asked if they could buy DD (5) a (silver) Tiffany charm bracelet when she was born. I chose the bracelet and each year we choose a charm to go on it based on that year. The relative has it, DD knows nothing about it and it will be presented to her when she's 12/13. Of course, she may not like it, but it's likely to keep its value and it's the thought that counts. (I treasure an old charm bracelet my nan gave me despite not wearing jewellery myself.). I see nothing beautiful or lasting in Pandora. Confused

Heatherplant · 26/12/2015 10:03

It's a personal taste thing, I've a Pandora necklace, but it would annoy me if I was also forking out money on a house that wasn't mine! If you really don't like them (the Pandora charms!!!) keep them all boxed etc and get them sold on.

TheCraicDealer · 26/12/2015 10:04

I don't like Pandora, but appreciate some people do. It seems really weird to buy an adult something like that in the first place, and then proceed to buy her add-ons for it even when you must have noticed she doesn't wear any other time you see her! Maybe you could say that you think you have the perfect amount of charms now and it would be too full if there were any more on it?

They're very "now" (probably like many things I love and wear) and I think they'll date very badly compared to a traditional charm bracelet, locket or similar. It's completely barmy to me buying one for a young child who'll be getting it in fifteen years or so.

ephemeralfairy · 26/12/2015 10:06

Pandora is tacksville. But super popular. People queuing outside on Christmas Eve!

TheCraicDealer · 26/12/2015 10:06

Heather makes a good point though- a friend tired of hers and got rid of the charms on eBay before Christmas last year, made an absolute mint.

Onlyonamonday · 26/12/2015 10:08

Pandora has become too common
I have two dds 18 & 20 and both have no interest in them.
Dd2 had one given for her 18th along with two charms, by my sil
"Would have been OK as a keep sake" I said.. But she sold it on a selling site 😐. I'm dreading sil buying any more charms .. Although, dd2 did thank her and said something along the lines of putting it away as a keep sake.

HeteronormativeHaybales · 26/12/2015 10:08

I don't like them, aesthetically, myself but I actually think it is very sweet of ILs. Yes, it is of its time, very much so, but isn't that sort of the point? When your dd is grown it will be vintage and retro.

I think the real issue here is the money. If you have a problem with MIL buying gifty when you are giving her money you need to address that, not sneer.

Bunbaker · 26/12/2015 10:08

I don't "get" this Pandora "thing", but I don't like bracelets. I have skinny wrists and all bracelets are too big for me. They get in the way and clutter up my arm. I do wear a watch though, even though I had to have most of the links taken out for it to fit.

Original poster
pleasedontopenpandorasbox · 26/12/2015 10:09

Thanks for the replies. I felt better just writing it down!

Obsidian and Enjol, sadly they would never believe it is full and to fill it I would need to spend my own money on Pandora tat!

I do get your point Enjol that DD might love it and enjoy filling it with charms but it is only a child's size so will have limited shelf life. Disappointed, yours sounds a much more thoughtful and meaningful way of achieving a similar end.

I am projecting my own feelings of it being overpriced, generic and an "easy" gift onto my in laws who both have a full Pandora bracelet each and love choosing new charms. I on the other hand would prefer a good book or a ticket to an exhibition. They know this but choose to give me gifts they would like anyway.

Totally forgot in the OP to mention it is my birthday today and the in laws are here as they came for Christmas. I know my present will be a charm already! Currently in bed having breakfast my DD and DH made. Will have to get up now but the lie in has been lovely!

OP posts:
ivykaty44 · 26/12/2015 10:09

I find the whole concept a rip off and produced to buy a product that is fairly worthless and boring mass produced rubbish - sorry.

But now the company has brought out another bracelet but the charms don't fit the original, which stinks if we want more money

BoomBoomsCousin · 26/12/2015 10:10

I don't really wear much jewelry and would feel like you if someone bought me a pandora bracelet, but I think YABU about your DD's gift. You don't know if she'll like it when she's older. If that's all they get you DD then I'd think they were thoughtless, little kids want things now, not things that they may like in 10 or 20 years. But if they also get her things she can play with now, just stash it away for safe keeping.

If they don't buy her anything else, let her play with it until it's ruined. Then tell them she had a great time with it, but maybe something plastic would be more suitable next time.

londonrach · 26/12/2015 10:11

Another one who didnt get it. The bracelet and charms are very big and look cheap and tacky. However in op case id keep it as it means something to her mil.

WilburIsSomePig · 26/12/2015 10:17

Well YANBU as you can like or dislike anything you want.

I am not a fan of Pandora, not really a fan of much jewellery but I really really dislike when people declare something 'tacky and ubiquitous, the new Links' like it's just so beneath them, knowing that it's something that really means a lot to some people. Although, I know that's not what you said OP, I'm referring to Cimcardishan's post.

People can like what they choose.

Klaptrap · 26/12/2015 10:22

I really don't like Pandora, I would never buy one for anyone (unless specifically asked to do so) as it is such a personal thing! If buying jewellery I always include a gift receipt with the item and make it clear it's fine to exchange if not to the receivers taste. I would rather they exchange something than never wear it because they don't like what I picked.

The queues outside Pandora always confuse me - what is so special about it that makes people behave that way? It's just like the Pizza Hut of the jewellery world!

YANBU Op!