Can't wait to give away my presents

[HopsNim]

Is this terrible? As I get older I just find I'm way more particular about the stuff I like. Also I HATE clutter and I've been trying to only keep things that I love or that are useful in the house.

I rarely keep any presents I get, around 90% get re gifted or sent to charity shop. It means I really treasure the lovely stuff (this year: posh towels from dsis; organic face cream MIL; diamond necklace DP; Molton brown bits from BIL and new books and wine from DM. And it doesn't get missed in the sea of Bayliss & Harding-esque gift sets (label snob ), festive socks/hats/scarves, photo frames and ornaments that I shall be dispensing of on Monday.

DIAMOND NECKLACE. Get the fuck out of here and back to the palace, pronto.

Diamond ique

I think you should suggest a family Secret Santa next year, OP. It sounds as if lots of undesired presents are being exchanged - what a wasteful, pointless habit.

The concerns for people who may have received similar gifts and appreciated them or no gifts at all so could be desperately upset actually annoy me. How patronising? It's a public forum and the people mentioned are well able to read ops post and think what a dick if they see fit. When you have little or no money you really don't need people trying to put blinkers on you.
The OP is going to regift or give to charity, I love picking up a bargain at the charity shop. I see no mention of landfill so I really don't see the issue.
Stealth boasts pah, she's already explained diamond meant twinkly and it doesn't matter how little money you have, you will still be aware of label people, and probably just regard them as lacking intelligence for buying into it.
Am very jealous of your lovely towels OP, enjoy them.

HopsNim I don't think you meant your post to come across in the way it did. I'm sure we all give items to charity shops that we don't want etc...and that's a very good thing for the charity shops!

Glad your items are going to a good home...MH charity shops always a worthwhile cause in my view too.

I doubt anyone would be desperately upset. But irritated or offended? Probably. Hence the entirely foreseeable flaming. I don't have a strong opinion on it really, I just think it wasn't something that really warranted posting about. Meh.

Ok some more random thoughts (sorry if it doesn't warrant posting, but I see loads of trivia on AIBU every day)

-do I mind if other family members do the same with my presents? Not at all. Of course I'm disappointed if they don't like something I put a lot of thought into (and I always do) but not much I can do. What did upset me one year is when brother left the present I got him ('dear uncle' mug with DC's pic on it) at my mum's and it's still there to this day!

-I really do have an irrational hatred of B&H. I think it's because they have a collection that completely rips off Philosophy stuff (which I really really love but alas no one has ever got me any and not even close to ever affording) but doesn't smell nice at all- and I always think 'I don't want that, I want the philosophy stuff that smells like actual birthday cake!!' when I see it in TK Maxx!!

not doing myself any favours here

I think your thread title did you no favours to start with, OP, it's rather unseemly - Christmas Day is only just over and you're gagging to offload gifts given to you in good faith. Your opening post just sent things further downhill.

It's all rather gauche really.

"gauche" 😄

Just tell people before Christmas next year, that if any one was kind enough to consider buying you a gift, then please could they donate the money they would have spent to charity instead.

You'll save your friends and family a lot of unnecessary time and effort, by not having to choose, wrap and deliver a gift you don't want any way.

The gifts given to you aren't free, and there's the thought and time taken to choose them too. Anyway all gifts aren't going to be perfect are they? You're an adult, its perfectly possible for you to explain nicely that you don't really do presents just cards are fine, and let people know donations to your favourite charity are very welcome if they so choose. Why would you accept and then give (some) to charity? Why let people spend on you, when you know you don't want the "below par" stuff? Christmas is barely over and you've already landed moaning about gifts to you. Brattish 1st world attitude problem of the highest order

I agree with you OP. Harsh but fair.

HopsNim
So you hate many of the presents people give to you but you're happy to re-gift them to others?
This shows that you don't give a toss what people think of 'your' presents you give to them doesn't it? by off loading your 'tat'
Maybe that's one reason why you do receive certain gift sets etc, because you're giving the same to others!

Btw have you considered that it could be secret common knowledge amongst your family and friends that you re gift most of the things you receive from them?

OP, if you're going to give away a lot of your presents at least have the good grace to do it discreetly.

I'm with you OP.

I strongly suspect like me you are a Marie kondo follower, hence keeping only things that are useful or bring you joy.

I always say thankyou (the thought counts) then quietly dispose of unwanted items via charity shops or willing friends. I have 8 boxes of chocolates and will give away 6 when visiting friends/family over the next month. I usually take something when we visit them anyway (fruit or cake) and so the boxes chocolates will be useful.

My favourite gifts are things like homemade chutneys and books on my reading list.

I hate clutter. I hate how we all get sucked into empty materialism and commercialism. Great for the economy I guess but rarely fulfilling.

We have really cut back with gifts/cards as an extended family and all use wish lists to minimise waste and maximise the funds we have. Our families are expanding rapidly and we find there is less tat this way.

I think it's got worse since we all started reading on kindle and downloading music and film. That's a whole lot of lovely wrap-uppable present buying potential wiped out in one fell swoop.

People feel they must give something tangible and physical but within a manageable budget, so we end up with piles of tat.

Grim.

I know a Molten Brown snob.

It makes her itch really badly but she won't use anything but Molten Brown so she washes really rarely. It shows. Meow.

Someone needs to buy her a nice Simple/Dove set so she can actually look clean.

Well you're better than the people piling in to tell a total stranger to fuck off and call you a cow/twat, that's for sure. The things people get worked up about!

Books are overrated? I've read it all now.

Op you sound like a joyless, miserable prat

Very crass post, sorry.

So many greedy grasping posts on MN re Christmas.

Maybe people all have these inner thoughts but they're the kind that should be kept in ones head.

BOF was spot on

Can't believe how ungrateful some people are. There is some poor lady in another thread who did not have a present to open. I suggest you send your presents to her. There are people who are flooded out, bet they would like some of your presents. I would be mortified if I knew my gifts to others were being sneered at as they were opened and then taken to a charity shop the next day. Next year just say no gifts at all and get everyone to donate to a charity or keep their money.

You sound snobby and yet you don't know the difference between a diamond necklace and a diamond effect necklace. Odd.

I'd never heard of either Molten Brown or Baylis and Harding until your post, but either way I wouldn't have mentioned brands because that's going to upset people who happily gave and received them. I also wish you hadn't said you had a diamond necklace, because now we're going to have 900 posts on the extremely uninteresting theme of whether you're right to use the term for your pendant.

However, I think you have a point under all that. We in the UK average some of the least generous living space in Europe, and given the housing crisis it doesn't appear to be getting better. It's no surprise that some people feel they've no choice other than to dispose of anything they don't absolutely love or find useful. Because people don't have the room. There've been a few posts illustrating that. But I echo PPs suggestion, try and instigate charity donations instead if you don't want gifts.