Mother wants to bring a chicken to my vegetarian Christmas dinner

[queenofthepirates]

That's kind of it in a nutshell. We've invited 10 people over for Christmas dinner including my mother. We're veggies and I've put together a lovely Scandi veggie menu. She's told me she's bringing a chicken and I've said please don't. Firstly because we're veggie and I don't really want a dead bird on the table and secondly I can't see why she can't last a few hours without meat.

My relationship with her is very strained this year, she's been pretty horrible to me and I'm getting to the end of my tether.

AIBU to tell her not to bring meat or stay at home? She could always come over after lunch if she's going to insist.

Original - I know someone who is a Vegan because he hates animals. He doesn't care about farming practices or suffering or that it's eating a living creature. He just thinks all animals are a disgusting waste of space and couldn't contemplate putting anything animal related into his body - he wears leather too. It's really funny when he meats Veggies/pescatarians/veggies who eat chicken who are all about cute animal welfare

Oh god SKIN

Boak - boak some more. The only rice pudding worth eating is Ambrosia from the tin. Skin indeed...

Skin is the best bit!

Heathens...

Erm, no Bertrand. I was commenting on the choices provided on OP's particular Christmas Day menu. Borscht for starter (beetroot, no alternative). Squash stuffed with aubergine and mint (no alternative). I said I personally would not be too happy with only beetroot, or a squash stuffed with aubergine and mint, as I personally don't like them. Are there any alternative vegetables offered? We don't know. But if OP's Mother has been invited and will have to eat all that is offered but would like a couple of chicken slices to help it down, then surely not much of a problem.

At least with a roast Christmas dinner, there is a choice of different vegetables and side dishes you can pick at, even if you don't want to eat the meat). Roast potatoes can easily be cooked in olive oil, bread and cranberry sauces don't contain meat juices, sprouts and chestnuts don't need bacon, cauliflower cheese, buttered carrots and parsnips. No meat there at all.

We don't eat Christmas pudding or mince pies, but PiLs like them, so I provide them when they come for Christmas lunch, as it is nice to make them feel welcome.
so, sticky-out-tongue emoticon to you :op

The skin is burnt fat that goes slimy in your mouth

I like sprouts and cabbage. Yum.

I think if you aren't wanting to eat your host's meal on any occasion including Christmas then you decline the invite. Your mum comes and eats your meal or she stays at home/ goes elsewhere.

Borscht for starter (beetroot, no alternative). Squash stuffed with aubergine and mint (no alternative)

I shamelessly cba to rtft, but is that Christmas lunch?? Not suprised the poor woman is asking for a bit of chicken tbh - I'd be smuggling in a drumstick and making lots of sneaky trips to the loo.

I have the same think with Jerusalem artichokes. I vomited up a plateful (most spectacularly in public) when I was pregnant and haven't been able to face them since.

Thank You, SirChen

You're welcome Evans - and I tell you what, your meat free Christmas lunch sounds much better!

OP (and some other posters) would rather let the poor Mum sit in an empty house, all alone, than let her have a slice or two of chicken with her yucky 'Scandi' squash, borscht and aubergine (none of which are Scandinavian, btw) . So sad

Merry Christmas, one and all

I kind of have some sympathy for the mother. With a vegetarian friend or relative it can be tough and feel like all the compromising is going one way. My DH is vegetarian. We have friends who others visit for dinner and they rave about what amazing cooks they are and the brilliant meals they cook. When we visit they they always default to vegetarian for everybody, and we're given some rather uninspiring pesto based dish every time. We go on holiday and struggle to find places to eat, we walk past wonderful restaurants we just can't go in because they don't do veggie. I've become a very good veggie cook, and he has no problem with me eating meat. It's annoying because in a lot of areas I have to conform and not make the choices I'd like to make because of the choice he has made, and it does get me down sometimes. But at the same time he has never objected to me eating meat and has been known to burn cook a steak for me. And we work it out because we care enough about each otherwise to rub along and compromise. And TBH I'd rather have him and no nice dinner parties rather than nice dinner parties and no him.

But in the case of the OP, if her Mum does veggie food for her, and cares enough to do that, I think it would be hurtful for her DD not to extend the same courtesy back and make sure that her DM doesn't feel disappointed at Xmas.

I'm wondering who, except for the OP and her partner, is a vegetarian at this meal too. I suspect many, if not all, of the other guests may be omnivores who would probably like a bit of meat too. I wonder how much of this is awareness that if the chicken was there the Scandi food will be rather overlooked?

Evans - I am agreeing with every word of yours on the screen.

Perhaps the OP could issue Scandi hair cloth shirts to all her guests too, just to make sure they're all really feeling the spirit of Christmas.

The word Scandi has started to annoy me

It really is irritating, isn't it? Especially when the nearest most of us will ever get to Scandinavia is the meatballs at Ikea.

SirChen and PvtePike

I do permit MrKoala to keep tins of RP in the house, but he has agreed to only eat it when i am in another time zone. It's a reciprocal agreement with me about eating gherkins.