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AIBU?

To be pissed off about his hair?

134 replies

doitanyways · 13/12/2015 20:36

Went away for weekend. He had promised me he'd get a haircut ready for interview on Monday (hasn't worked since April.) Just got home, no haircut. Which means no job, I could scream!!

OP posts:

Report

PlaymobilPirate · 13/12/2015 21:37

Are you on about your son?

I've never known anyone get a job on the basis of their haircut - one of my senior managers looks like she's been dragged through a hedge backwards and forwards and back again can't say it affects her work

NeedMoreSleepOrSugar · 13/12/2015 21:46

Apparently he has spent all weekend Preparing Answers but the one thing that could have actually helped, he didn't do If it was an either/or, I'd rather someone I was interviewing had prepared answers than sorted out their hair! I'm guessing though that a) there was time for both and b) you don't believe that he actually has spent the weekend prepping?

Assuming this is an adult with no significant learning difficulties, then surely you just leave him to it and let him face the consequences of his (in)actions?

Clarabumps · 13/12/2015 21:47

holy shit! talk about a drip feed!!

MistressDeeCee · 13/12/2015 21:51

He hasnt worked for 8 months and won't smarten up to give himself more chance of getting the job = he is lazy. Which I guess you know, OP. You're the money provider and his fallback. YANBU OP, this is a total pisstake. What you do about this now I don't know, but no bloke could be workshy and scruffy around here, I simply wouldn't be able to stand it the irritation would kill me so out he'd have to go

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 13/12/2015 21:52

Who is this person!?

Bluecheese22 · 13/12/2015 21:53

Bored already! Just say who!

doitanyways · 13/12/2015 21:54

The problem is, NeedMore, he prepares by rehearing answers to questions he thinks he may be asked but then panics if he is not asked them,

All I can say is there is no way he looks like someone professional and employable. He looks like a homeless person frankly.

OP posts:

doitanyways · 13/12/2015 21:55

I said who it was

And fuck off with 'bored already!' I'm 'bored already' of providing endless support, money, basic household items and so on, I'm really bored of it actually but unlike you I don't get to step back.

OP posts:

LIZS · 13/12/2015 21:57

It sounds as if the issue goes beyond needing a haircut. Is he really currently professional and employable if this is his modus operandi? What external support and advice is he receiving?

KeepOnMoving1 · 13/12/2015 21:58

Fgs you are being vague about something that is relevant. Is it your child or a partner because it makes a difference.

doitanyways · 13/12/2015 22:00

I have said already who it is. I do, honestly, understand long threads can be hard to keep up with but two pages?

OP posts:

bloodypeople · 13/12/2015 22:00

'Caring responsibilities towards'?

Manopaws · 13/12/2015 22:00

What has hair got to do with it????

My last interview I had Looonnnnnngggggggg hair and got the job. It's not what you look like it's what you know.

He done the right thing by preparing answers and if possible do some research on the people interviewing you.

Nice to see you've got faith in him "I wouldn't employ him to be honest." if he thinks you would employ him why should he think anyone else would.

Yes look presentable but long hair alone would make the difference.

ChinaSorrows · 13/12/2015 22:02

You didn't actually say who this person is beyond "someone I have caring responsibilities towards"

Which could be anyone from your nephew to your father, husband, son,... Anyone. Which is why people are asking, it's difficult to comprehend the relationship you have with this person and why you're so furious.

If it's such a big deal for him to go to the barber then cut it for him.

It's REALLY not that hard. Promise. I cut DH's hair. He's got a nick grimshawesque quiff now too (because that's what he wanted!) I use the clippers, scissors and hair thinners.

Justbatteringon · 13/12/2015 22:04

No, it's someone I have caring responsibilities towards put it that way! seriously that could be anyone for gods sake I have caring responsibilities towards my dog it doesn't clarify anything.

Oysterbabe · 13/12/2015 22:04

You have at no point said who it is.

Dipankrispaneven · 13/12/2015 22:04

OP, I'm on your side, and you may well feel that you have said who this person is, but you haven't.

Interviewers are not going to say to themselves "Good for him, he spent his time preparing for his interview and didn't waste it getting a haircut". I get your frustration, he could perfectly well have carried on thinking about his answers whilst in the barber's chair.

Sgtmajormummy · 13/12/2015 22:04

Hair gel and a ponytail. Speaking as a person with brothers whose hair tends to the wild and bushy side.
He'll look suitably hipsterish and might even take it as his new look.

doitanyways · 13/12/2015 22:05

China, I don't actually want to say who it is, but it is not my partner or son. However I have sole caring responsibilities towards / for - not even sure what the right turn of phrase is.

At present, because he has no money coming in other than jobseekers, I am providing financial support as well as emotional and it's really the latter which is draining beyond belief, and trust me on this - he is NOT 'doing the right thing' rocking up to an interview looking like a tramp with script like answers to questions he probably won't be asked.

OP posts:

sparkleglitterdaisy · 13/12/2015 22:06

My DH has long hair in a ponytail most of the time , my eldest son has a huge mop of curly hair - hasn't cut it for over a year , I hate it , however it doesn't seem to have stopped either of them getting work , promotions etc...in fact when I talk to others they say it makes them really individual & stand out . I think to be successful it's confidence , knowledge etc... That helps get a job . Times have changed - short back & sides hair is no longer as important . So try & have faith in him , wish him the best in the morning & be positive, not negative . I would resent my DH if he told me how to have my hair , so I don't lecture him about his - he has a very good job by the way :) !!

doitanyways · 13/12/2015 22:09

I really can't explain it, it would not go back into a ponytail. It's more like a huge mop on the top of his head and static-y as he endlessly runs his hands through it when nervous or wound up, which he would be at an interview. He never looks 'tidy' to be honest and while I wont say what sort of job it is I will say it's the sort of environment where looking clean and neat and conventional is key.

OP posts:

ChinaSorrows · 13/12/2015 22:09

If you don't want to say then be honest from the start, don't bloody lie. "I have already said who it is"
Lie
You were also rude to previous posters, implying that they were unable to keep up with the thread.

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doitanyways · 13/12/2015 22:11

I most certainly did not lie. I told you it was someone I had caring responsibilities towards and people still kept shrieking that they didn't know who it was. Hiding thread now.

OP posts:

AlisonWunderland · 13/12/2015 22:13

Hair band and a bucketful of hair gel.
Job done

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 13/12/2015 22:13

That could be anyone really - it doesn't explain what your level of responsibility towards him is.

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