To just ask for an ELCS?

[NotAWhaleOmeletteInSight]

I'm 7 months pregnant with dc2. Dc1 is 21 months old and my experience of birth was extremely traumatic. I don't want to go into loads of detail but it went very wrong, dc was in danger, it ended in theatre with a room full of people, spinal, forceps etc. Afterwards I'm fairly sure I had undiagnosed pnd, although I didn't know it at the time.

The hospital have apologised for how things went and I'm under the consultant for this pregnancy, because I'm so worried about the birth.

I've been psyching myself up for it and they've promised that I can have an epidural as soon as I arrive if I want (they talked me out of it last time). They've also asked if I want an ELCS.

I know this isn't technically an AIBU but I'd really appreciate your opinions. The more I think about it, the more I don't know if I can face going through labour again, although I know it's unlikely to be like last time.

I'm also worried though about the recovery from a CS whilst looking after a toddler. Dh will have 2 weeks off work, and then my mum will come to stay for a bit (family all live hundreds of miles away). I don't need to drive as we live in the suburbs and everything is walkable.

Just how bad is the recovery from an ELCS? Should I just go for it?

sheba you are right, it's not a moral choice, just sometimes you just don't get the choice.

And there is no competition here believe me. I just don't understand how it can be impossible for one child, yet very easy for the next. I didn't do anything different!
In part I'd like the op to see this, and realise it can be a better experience. It's not set in stone that it has to be a repeat of a bad experience. A cs does sound a better choice for you then go for it! It will be different thus a chance of better.

I've just (last week) had an EMCS after a failed forceps delivery. The irony was I was told due to low placenta at the 20 week scan I may need a c section. Then at 34 weeks was told it had moved so started to look forward to a natural birth. But it didn't happen so part of me wishes I'd have just had a elcs in the first place

I know someone whose anaesthetics kicked in only after they had started cutting her up

1. You don't get "cut up". The incision, while deep, is relatively small - around 15-20cm in length? They're not down there with a chainsaw chopping your pelvis open FFS.

1. They check you're numb before they begin. If you're not numb, they don't start. There's actually a proper instrument used for this, it looks like a wheel with little blunt headed pins in it. They roll it upwards, starting at your feet, and you have to tell them at what point you can feel it. Then they do a cold test with a spray, again starting at your feet and spraying upwards until you can feel it. Then they do a sharp test with a pin. In an emergency where time is a factor and they don't have time to wait for the spinal to take effect, they do a general anaesthetic.

With my ELCS it took time for the spinal to work, they tilted the bed up and to the side and it helped it to work more quickly. The anaesthetist was with me throughout, chatting to me, and told me to tell her if I felt anything uncomfortable. She also asked at regular intervals was I okay, did I have any pain, etc. She told me beforehand that at the slightest hint of pain she'd shoot me up with painkillers and/or do a general anaesthetic depending on circumstances.

It would be very rare, not to mention unlucky and negligent, for them to begin a CS without first checking that the anaesthetic had worked. It is not something that routinely happens.

Though I am personally of the opinion that women with difficult births should limit the number of daughters they saddle with those genetics

The type of birth you have has fuck all to do with genetics, nothing like piling unnecessary guilt onto people is there? There'll be people here who have had difficult and traumatic births, to then imply that they've 'saddled' their daughter with dodgy birthing genes is a pretty shitty opinion. There's a time and place, this wasn't that time or place.

Cardbordeau is the one who has talked sense there.

To the poster who talked about the genetics I have "saddled" my DDs with, please keep your ignorant and ill informed bollocks to yourself.

Bloody hell op. Your childbirth experience sounds like some sort of torture at the hands of some nasty people. Not a supposedly compassionate health service. I felt similar last week and was told badgered and derided for not pushing although I couldn't even move a muscle due to pain and extreme fear l told them I needed an epidural but was told no as was fully dilated then told them you are going to have to take me to theatre then as I can't do this. Yes you can. Don't tell me I can I've delivered naturally twice. The upshot was also head stuck failed forceps straight to EMCS

Another vote for an ELCS here OP. I had mine five weeks ago with DC1 and it was bloody amazing. Surgical team were lovely and created a really relaxed and happy atmosphere. DS was born pink and screaming, rooting away and fed like a dream in recovery room. Milk came in 48 hours later. My recovery was great and was out for walk day five, with us walking three miles to the pub and back day six.

It was how I wanted to give birth and I wouldn't change a thing. I don't give it a second thought as there is no - literally no - degree of trauma associated with it in my mind. It's just the wonderful morning I met my baby.

I am a strong avocate for a woman's right to choose what's right for her be that ELCS or home birth. Stick to your guns with what you want and if you want any support at all feel free to PM me. And my big tip for if you do go ahead with the ELCS is to make sure that you take the pain relief offered like clockwork afterwards. That and big baggy pants! Good luck with everything, it sounds like a horrible time first time round and you deserve so much better

I'm always amazed by how negative people can be about other women's birth choices...why do some women try to put others down so much?

I've had 2 c-sections and can recommend them. Milk was fine, bonded well etc.

I'm glad you have decided to go for it OP. The last thing you need is extra stress worrying about another traumatic birth.

I was driving 2 weeks after and it was fine. Also had a toddler at home too. Take all the help you are offered!

Good luck!

Oh OP what a nightmare for you. I think you are right to opt for the CS.
I was fortunate to have a gas and air only water birth with my DD, which was wonderful. HOWEVER, the reason it all went so well is that her birth was 'textbook'. She was the right size in the right position, etc. That makes ALL the difference.
You were very unfortunate and the 9 month recovery sounds horrendous. If you are happy with the idea of a planned CS then it sounds like it could be very healing for you as it will feel much more controlled than any natural birth can ever be. Best of luck. X

I had a ELCS as he was breech. It was a gentle, calm and positive experience for me but I do feel Ds would have benefited from some prior warning of the change that's was about to occur! He was a hyper alert and irritable baby and I think it may be partly attributed to the birth. However, with babies it's a guessing game and it could be attributed to many other things too.

Recovery was smooth. I was up and showering the next morning, all tubes removed as well. The pain was nothing to write home about either. Just keep on top of your pain relief when you go home. I think that if you are already a fit and active person with an 'I'm not a patient, I'm a new mother that needs to get on with this' attitude it's fine.

Be aware that your colostrum may not let down as easily at first and that your baby may not be as interested in feeding straight away. I expressed and froze mine a few weeks before and continued to express into a syringe till he woke up a bit.

Good luck.

OP I couldn't agree with you more!!!

I've decided on an ELCS for DS2. First birth was terrible, 13 days overdue, induction, failure to progress (he's still a lazy weasel), drip failed epidural, forceps, theater, episiotomy, then, worst of all, shoulder distocia. Total and utter panic. My DH describes it like something out of a war zone. Luckily I barely remember.

Then 2nd degree tear, and PPH for me. Transfusions the lot. Stitching for ages.

luckily DS was fine. A "healthy" 9lb11.

My consultant for DS2 has been brilliant. No question of pushing for VB, he said although stats show that recurrence of shoulder distocia is only 10-15%. He said they used to try and persuade women to VB but he said I don't agree with that and we'll give you the birth you want and feel comfortable with.

Scheduled in 5 weeks time. Can't say I am looking forward to ELCS but I would be terrified of a VB being like the last one.

My DSis had a general for her first DC. Then ELCS. Said that the recovery from ELCS was a doddle for her. Up and about in 2 days.

I had a similar birth experience and was told I would be recommended a CS for any future births. Ask without hesitation.

I had a similarly traumatic first delivery - baby's head not rotated fully and heart-rate dropping. I ended up with a roomful of people and emergency mid-cavity forceps delivery with lots of tearing. I didn't have time for an epidural so it was pretty horrific.

I didn't even consider having a CS for my second baby, but I was clear that I wanted an epidural early on. It went brilliantly, very calm, painless and no tearing. There were just two midwives, soft lights and quiet music during the delivery. We went home next day and my recovery was fine.

I think with a 2nd baby in many cases, both you and your body are more ready. I would only have a CS as a last resort and if it was medically necessary.

I had an EMCS after a very long and traumatic labour, with failure to progress. It was fine, although it has taken me a year to feel right again. I try not to think about the labour (endless examinations, decreasing heartbeat and trying to get monitors attached), but the c section itself was fine. Like you, I knew something was wrong and I wished I'd had the section before I was completely and utterly exhausted.

One (unintended) advantage of the ELCS, is that given your previous trauma, you won't have to go through the massive fobbing off process to even get admitted to the ward, which has happened to nearly all my friends lately. They practically had the baby's head out before they were allowed to come in. Sounds like I'm scaremongering I know, but that would be the last bloody thing you need.

Good luck OP. Hope it all goes well.

A positive CS can be a really empowering experience, particularly if you've had a previous traumatic delivery.

Perhaps a general anaesthetic would help you? You'd not know anything about it until it was all over. I'd prefer that I think than being awake if I had to do it again.

Oh fuck off Princess

It isn't more expensive. More expensive than a straightforward VB but how many VBs stay straightforward? The extra money spent on treatment for birth injuries following VB is actually saved by having an ELCS.

And only 2% of women ask for CS anyway so it's hardly a large number

Average c-section costs £1700, average vaginal birth £750, so yes, almost 2.5x more expensive.

Tocophobia is of course an indication for an ELCS. Recovery from an ELCS will usually be quick, but of course you won't know if it is for you.

But the costs of treating the problems if a VB goes wrong will be a lot higher than a c section

Though I am personally of the opinion that women with difficult births should limit the number of daughters they saddle with those genetics

ODFOD

Fuck off princess. Disappointed!? I'd rather be alive with a live baby than disappointed. There are people here who would rather have a baby and their sanity in tact than be disappointed. There are people here who would rather not risk further serious damage to their pelvic region than be disappointed.

Average is the word of interest here. Data show that vb is cheaper than cs. See Y8 maths text books.

It is neither here nor there, because it is of course not OP's to pay.

I agree, OP, having read your account of your last birth I would go for an ELCS, too. The recovery from that won't have been that much easier than the recovery from a planned section would be.

Reni it doesn't take into account long term costs of vb. that it literally the up front cost...

I know you don't like me from other threads but there's no need for insulting comments, makes you look immature