New nursery expects all potential pupils be potty trained, even the 2 year olds.

[FundraisingPTABitch]

That's it really. I'm new to this part of town, and so is this nursery.

When I enquired with the admin about this policy, they said every potential pupil must be potty trained.

AIBU to think this nursery can just fuck off? I will potty train my little child when both the child and I are both ready.

Ludicrous. Irresponsible! Elitist!

I tried that with DD at 18 months and it didn't work at all.

Well they shouldn't be doing that Hacker they have a duty of care to the children if you work with young children you should expect accidents sometimes ds2 went to a mainstream nursery in nappies we didn't get a diagnosis in till he was three and a half I never get called I just sent in pull ups and wipes to be fair he was probably the only child still in pull ups but even neurotypical children can have accidents at 3/ 4.

I suppose you'd left it too late Bunbaker!

Exactly reni you kept quiet, it was an embarrassment in the day, now we are more open and flexible. With the cloth nappies, like somebody said, children could feel what their bodies are doing, whereas in a nappy not so. My ds nursery requires he wear a nappy there even though they take him regularly to the toilet, when he gets home, off comes the nappy, on come the pants and pj bottoms, he immediately starts recognising what is happening when he wets himself, makes much more of an effort to take himself to the toilet or potty, even though he does not always make it in time. In a nappy he will stand there and wee himself and not do anything.

The reason why children are now potty trained later is because we now know that it is better to wait until the child is ready/shows interest in using the toilet. That is the advice everywhere, the nursery is entitled to do whatever they please but is a somewhat old-fashioned point of view. Some are ready by 18 months, some aren't ready until 3. Insisting every child is potty trained by 2 doesn't do them any favours.

A pre school that is insisting children are toilet trained or saying they can't provide facilities for changing, needs reporting to ofsted. They are discriminating against disabled children.

Tiggytape- Sorry I wasn't clear, I meant that children will spend all week with me dry, being able to ask to use potty but then they go home for weekend, out for lunch with granny on Sunday afternoon and put a nappy on because they don't think child could ask to go, and then Monday morning we have taken a step backwards. Potty training isn't always convenient so it's often left and left

button I am having the opposite at the moment.

But surely you can all see how it would be much easier for nurseries if the parents at least tried to train them before 2.
That way if they have 50 children, they might have 20 fully dry, 10 semi dry and 20 in nappies still. It means that's 20 less nappies to change, and those 10 half trained will be fully trained quickly so just a few days/ weeks max of 10 wet sometimes. That leaves them just 20 in nappies after say 2 months of starting who they can then work with to help train, those 20 can see the other 30 using toilets and encouraged and usually speeds up their progress also

Mine would never have been ' ready' themselves on their own accord. They need us to say right, this is what we are doing.

I also liked training early because I was lazy. Putting on toilet after a meal or when I changed nappy meant I didn't change nappy, then sit down to work and find they had then filled nappy 10 mins later. Putting on toilet as babies meant they had fully emptied themselves. I also used reusables and although we have a washing machine, having two in nappies when not needed would have been a pain as would have had to wash far more often.

I think many people should try from much younger. If at 2 they aren't dry still then that's fine as obviously not ready if you have been encouraging since sitting up. But to start at 2 and say they aren't ready is silly as you haven't given them time.
It's like them feeding themselves. If you start at weaning age helping them but also letting them try themselves then by 2 years you will most likely have a child who can feed themselves well with cutlery as have had 18 months practice . You cant spoon feed them until 2, then give them cutlery and expect them to know what to do straight away without time to gradually learn

But I just don't see the problem. With a two yr old in nappies art by three _ three and a half most children are out of nappies and when they are ready they will do it in a couple of weeks instead of months of endless taking them to the potty every twenty minutes its time consuming and pointless if the child just isn't getting it.

Some children are not ready to start at 2. It is just obvious that they are not. Ds is 9 and isn't ready.

This is in America."But over the last few decades, the age at which toddlers become diaper-free has been creeping upward. In 1957, 92 percent of children were toilet-trained by the age of 18 months, studies found. Today the figure for 2-year-olds is just 4 percent, according to a large-scale Philadelphia study. Only 60 percent of children have achieved mastery of the toilet by 36 months, the study found, and 2 percent remain untrained at the age of 4 years.

cleaty IF that is true for the UK, which it isn't, then where are these 4 year olds in nappies?

As i pointed out above, it's less than 1 child in every 10 schools that start in nappies. This is far less than even the increased SN inclusion rate...

So where are these 4 year old in nappies?

as i have said before, the data doesn't match what you say. there is no massive increase.

X2 - I didn't take them every 20 Mins, more like every 2-3 hours. I worked from home so wouldn't have worked if it was every 20 mins! It was basically when I went to the toilet also so did them at same time. As small Babies when not using toilet I would change nappy every hour roughly as didn't want them sitting in wee so was far more work

Many two year olds learn to use the potty in a week. There is a huge difference between a 24 month old child and. 30 month old child or even a 36 month old.

Once a child can walk and talk in sentences they are usually ready for potty training. Whether the parents are ready or are prepared to make time is often another matter.

There are about 700 000 births per year so that means about 0.2 to 0.3% of children start school in nappies. This is easily explained by sn.

I do agree with Art, I see potty training very much like weening and I am not sure why others don't. Of course some children won't be ready to potty train at 18 -24 months, like some children can't cope with solids at 6months but the longer you leave it, the harder it becomes.

Now I am not for a minute insinuating there that you take a nappy off completely but introducing potty into daily routine, for example before and after meals, is in no way going to harm a child, and when the time comes when you want your child in pants, it won't be a foreign object. You have to remember children have been in nappies since birth, if we don't teach them about the potty, it will take years, just as if you hadn't introduced foods children will be drinking milk for ages, of course there would be a natural stopping point but I bet it would be well after the advised 6month mark! I'm well aware my words will now be taken out of context so let me make it clear all children develop at different rates, not all children will be trained to use toilet by two, but there is no harm in starting to teach them about it early.

723,000 in 2010. I'm so glad someone worked out percentages for me

I think there must be a correlation between dispoable nappies and an increase in the age of toilet training. There is no real incentive for the child to use the toilet or the parents to make them until the child has to go to school. The child doesn't feel wet and it's probably easier to use a pull up then do the mad dash to find a toilet in 30 seconds flat.

Cloth nappies on the other hand let the child know they've had an accident. Heck even the old style training pants from Mothercare do.

I used babysigning with DS from being a baby. At 15 months I recognised the face he made before doing a poo, and he was able to sign toilet at the same time.
I then would grab him and run towards the nearest toilet. I rarely had to change a dirty nappy after that.
I did not consider that toilet training, as he couldn't have removed his trousers, pulled down his pants, etc.

I took Dd out of nappies (no pull-ups either) before she was 2.5. She was still having regular accidents until about 3.5. At least daily, often more. Wees were usually quite easy to catch with regular loo breaks, poos much less so. I cleaned up pooey pants for over a year. I fucking resent the implication that she could have been trained earlier "if I was prepared to make time". Incidentally she was talking in full sentences and walking by 18 months. Just because your child was ready at 2 doesn't mean all children will be ready at 2.

Of course not sweet adeline- but IME (over 10yrs in early years) a lot of children don't get it because for years potty/toilet was an unfamiliar object and then when they do start to pick it up its not always convenient to parents lives, it's much easier to put a nappy on than it is to pack 3/4 changes of clothes. Of course not all parents do this, but a lot do.

Well as someone who did pack (and need to use) multiple changes of clothing for well over a year I cannot think why that would be seen as a better approach than waiting until they are ready. And by ready I mean have an awareness that they need to go in sufficient time to make it to the toilet. For Dd that happened at 3.5 despite being out of nappies for over a year.

There is some suggestions in the articles on this, that later toilet training has led to more problems with children holding on, and thus higher rates of constipation and urinary tract infections. The reasoning is that if you leave it until they are 2 or 3 to start, you are far more likely at that age to get into a battle of wills, than you are with a younger child.

Same experience as SweetAdeline. Minus the pooey pants thankfully. Wee accidents til 4. Both DDs followed an identical pattern. Tried at v young age & both v familiar with toilet & potty. Didn't put it away btwn DDs, both crawled into bathroom with me when I went. Didn't make a blind bit of difference.

No SN, on point with other developmental milestones. Top of class now yada yada.

The main problem I had was that I withdrew socially during the year of wee accidents with DD1 plus a newborn. How could I sit and breast feed a baby at a toddlers group if I only had 10 seconds notice re the requirement of my older DD to pee? It really got me down & was very restricted. It also caused me to feel huge guilt about negative feelings I had towards DD1 about it.

I never judge late potty trainers or their parents. Or those who struggle to do things which came easily to us/me. Everyone has their weak points and ultimately no one can escape the taunt of being human.