Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be tired of hearing about being a mummee

54 replies

pullofthemoon · 03/12/2015 19:42

One of my colleagues is a mummy.

She invests a great deal in this especially around Christmas. She is very into Elf on the shelf and every day I hear about elf on the shelf. I also hear about her DS and his Christmas and the boring hilarious things he has said and done and ... I'm bored!

Is there a nice way of saying 'wind your neck in, no one cares'?

OP posts:
TangledUpInGin · 03/12/2015 19:44

Erm, no, not really, but I feel your pain Flowers I have a wedding one in my office.....and she knows I've just got divorced Grin

immortalwife · 03/12/2015 19:45

Aww that's sad for her.. Sounds like she really gives a shit about her kids and is so proud and happy about the little things he does she can't help but share...Hmm

EotS thing is barmy tho. Maybe she's feeling creative??

If it bothers you, change the subject! You may find that outside of work her entire life is family based and you no longer converse at all because she feels embarrassed to bring up the things she cares about.

TudorTrace · 03/12/2015 19:47

I thought it was just me, OP.

I really dislike when friends/family are constantly trying to portray themselves as 'Mummy of the Year' Hmm

I can't see why anyone else would find what your child has said funny. It's only funny to you as a Mother because you know them so deeply. It's hardly ever a widely recognised comedy.

Original poster
pullofthemoon · 03/12/2015 19:47

Yes, I give a shit about mine as well, but I don't expect to outline everything they do to disinterested parties.

OP posts:
strawberryandaflake · 03/12/2015 19:48

Ugh. Nothing worse than someone who lives their life through their kids and insists on keeping you updated every minute. I'd just interrupt her mid-sentence or pick up the phone or something and change the topic. Rude, I know, but sometimes you have to help yourself keep your sanity

Costacoffeeplease · 03/12/2015 19:52

Oh I'm glad I work from home on my own, elf on the frigging shelf updates would just about finish me off - it's just such a ridiculous concept, I can't believe anyone has bought into it - good marketing though Smile

Faye12345 · 03/12/2015 19:53

Yep. Its boring!😂😂😂 I cant bear all the facebook pregnancy and baby posts too and i like kids!

SparklesandBangs · 03/12/2015 20:09

This would (did) wind me up to. Never found a way to politely stop it though. I used to hope that big boss would be in as he doesn't like chatter.

My colleague had the double whammy of stepkids and a wedding, I was new to the team and at first I showed an interest in tales of woe of the children and how hard it was to work and look after them (she had them EOW and 1 evening for tea, her DP (the dad) was very hands on) I found it harder and harder to engage as my children are not much older, but I had them full time with a DH who worked away for weeks at a time. The wedding dramas ran for 12 months, and we still had 3 months to go, never have I been so pleased to see someone leave.
Now there are 4 in the team and whilst we all mention our life outside of the workplace, it doesn't dominate the whole day and provide endless distraction from doing what we are paid to do.

shutupandshop · 03/12/2015 20:11

Glaze over.

Original poster
pullofthemoon · 03/12/2015 20:12

For some reason she singles me out for conversation and it's hard then for me to join in the normal conversations as she is shouting down by ear about fucking elves!

OP posts:
MrsDeVere · 03/12/2015 20:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
pullofthemoon · 03/12/2015 20:14

Yes, crisp eating is annoying too! Grin

OP posts:
JasperDamerel · 03/12/2015 20:16

Could you do a list of acceptable workplace topics of conversation?

Topics to avoid: children, weddings, romances, nights out, holidays, diets, sports, holidays, training for sponsored event of a challenging nature, pets, religion, politics, reality TV/Strictly/Bake Off/ Downton etc, spouses/partners, impressive food they've cooked recently/gossip about colleagues/ symptoms of illnesses/ pregnancy.

Original poster
pullofthemoon · 03/12/2015 20:19

I don't think the topic is the issue. It's the fact that it isn't a conversation - more of a monologue with pauses for 'mmm hmms' from me.

Plus I am WORKING. I don't want to hear about a four year olds letter to Santa.

OP posts:
ovenchips · 03/12/2015 20:19

I do struggle with that phenomenon too. It is normally accompanied by women who refer to themselves as mummy when their children aren't even there 'I just want to be the best mummy I can be, don't you?' is pretty bloody weird IMHO.

LookAtMeGo · 03/12/2015 20:21

Is EOW and one evening for tea 'very hands on'? Confused

donajimena · 03/12/2015 20:24

Its not gender specific. I work with two men and I am tired of hearing about little Johnny and his sporting prowess. Or tinkerbelle and her supreme confidence and talent. I have two children and I barely mention them probably because they don't leave their sodding rooms and just watch youtube

megletthesecond · 03/12/2015 20:25

I'd work with her. I hate our silent office and will listen to any old crap to keep my brain going.

AcrossthePond55 · 03/12/2015 20:32

I have to admit I feel sorry for these parents who are so invested in their kids' every utterance. They just don't seem to have 'lives' separate from their children, schools, and activities!

What they don't realize is what will happen to them when their kids grow up and fly the nest. I'm older and in our 'circle' pretty much all of our kids have flown the nest and some of our friends….well it's just pitiful. Their lives feel so empty to them. Half of them sit around waiting for the kids to call, the other half are resentful of their kids' spouses. If you want to know where nightmare MiLs and FiLs come from, now you know.

DH and I were very involved with our sons' lives, but we still had our own. We knew the time would come when it was just us two again and instead of our being 'bereft' we're having the time of our lives.

AskBasil · 03/12/2015 20:35

I've got a colleague who goes on and on and on about her fucking cat.

I just don't give a flying fuck about her cat.

Then there's the colleague who is a raging conspiracy theorist and has a mad explanation for everything that's ever happened. You have to be very careful not to say the words "alien", marilyn monroe" "kennedy" "diana" or "Blair" in his hearing.

But to answer your question, no, there is no way of saying "please don't talk about this subject that interests you and doesn't interest me" to a work colleague. You just have to put up with people talking about what they want to and suddenly get very involved in a terribly important e-mail when they go on and on.

Original poster
pullofthemoon · 03/12/2015 20:37

She is a conversational leopard. She drives me away from the rest of the pack, isolates me and pounces.

I hate it.

OP posts:
BitOutOfPractice · 03/12/2015 20:38

LookAtMe I assumed that SparklesandBangs meant that he was very hands on when he had his DC so his DP had no reason to compalian about how hard it was, even in the ahort time they were with them.

I wonder sometimes why people feel the need to pick stuff apart like that - it was perfectly obvious what she meant so Confused back at you. And yes, I'm grumpy

BitOutOfPractice · 03/12/2015 20:38

ahort = short

dodobookends · 03/12/2015 20:39

I've got a colleague who goes on and on about her fucking cat

Her name isn't Mrs Slocombe by any chance? Grin

regenerationfez · 03/12/2015 20:40

what's elf on a shelf again??