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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not want to see my mi laws crusty face on Boxing Day

57 replies

Tamponlady · 30/11/2015 17:47

Bil came over this weekend we were chatting as you do asking about Christmas plans.oh then said oh I herd mum and dad and going to sisters.

Bil then said yeah the plan is hers on Christmas then yours on Boxing Day he saw my face then Tried to back track saying he wasn't sure what the plans were

I mean what the fuck how can you make plans to go to someone's house for Christmas with out asking them first do said he's as shocked as I was

She is very toxic tbh I stopped going to hers 4 years ago

I think it's a Liberty tbh

OP posts:

DoreenLethal · 30/11/2015 17:49

Good opportunity to make some plans before she lands it on you

Arfarfanarf · 30/11/2015 17:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MizK · 30/11/2015 17:52

Her crusty face?!

I hope there is good reason behind you saying this about your MIL otherwise that's really foul.

Does she know you hate her? Why would she want to be in your house if you think so little of her and her son seemingly has no problem with you slating her? I'm sure it won't exactly be a feelgood festive vibe at yours if she's there.... perhaps your DP should let her know you can't have her round.

NewLife4Me · 30/11/2015 17:52

We all arranged to go to mil xmas eve and forgot to ask her.
it was really thinking out loud and everyone said what a brill idea.
She finds it funny, but we all get on well.

Ask bil why he has made plans for your xmas and why mil when you haven't seen her for 4 years at xmas time.

The liberty is your bil tbh. Or should that be liability?

Backawaynow2 · 30/11/2015 17:53

How can they come if they haven't been Asked?

Ignore. If they mention it say you have plans.

ThisIsStartingToBoreMe · 30/11/2015 17:53

I hope my DIL never starts a thread about me containing the words "not want to see my mi laws crusty face"

YABU

Backawaynow2 · 30/11/2015 17:54

Yes why is her face crusty?

fastdaytears · 30/11/2015 17:58

Is it a medical condition?

Savagebeauty · 30/11/2015 17:58

You should hear what I called my ex MIL.

fastdaytears · 30/11/2015 18:00

Mine called me a manipulative cunt and all I could think was that she was basically describing herself. But I didn't say it, and her face was fine. Not great, but not crusty.

ComposHatComesBack · 30/11/2015 18:00

I often wonder on threads like this if the mother in law in question were to offer their perspective on the tetchy relationship with their daughter in law whether it would shed a different light on how the relationship soured.

If you are equally crass in real life as you are on this thread, him not surprised your mother in law struggles to get along with you.

Cornettoninja · 30/11/2015 18:00

Book Panto tickets and go out.

Are you sure your DH hasn't arranged his mum coming over?

Jackie0 · 30/11/2015 18:02

He may well have made a mistake but yes it would indeed be a liberty of the highest order to land down at anyone's house uninvited.
Have you not seen her in four years or just not been to her house?
I wouldn't open the door to her.

abbieanders · 30/11/2015 18:02

Would it be that dramatic if they called round over Christmas?

Badders123 · 30/11/2015 18:02

You lose any moral high ground when you resort to name calling tbh.

usual · 30/11/2015 18:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BaronessSamedi · 30/11/2015 18:06

i also would not open the door to her.
if she's as bad as that.
could you take yourselves off for the day to avoid her? although, really you shouldn't have to put yourselves out of your house just to get away from her.
DH should step up and find out what her intentions are.

mintoil · 30/11/2015 18:06

What are your Boxing Day plans OP? Hopefully ones that involve you not being at home at all?

frillybiscuits · 30/11/2015 18:09

You should hear what I called my exMIL too

She once turned up on my doorstep without asking (exP didn't live there) and expected to come in and have coffee. I told her to stick it where the sun don't shine. No one should expect to be in your house without making arrangements, 'family' or not

LuciaInFurs · 30/11/2015 18:11

YANBU! Can you be 'busy' on Boxing Day? Definitely start dropping hints now that you have plans.

MizK · 30/11/2015 18:14

frillybiscuits you sent your MIL away for dropping in for a coffee? Who raised you? Unless there has been a huge row or something, that is so rude and petty.

XiCi · 30/11/2015 18:14

What a delightful person you sound!

How dare your dh mum think she can see her son and his family over Christmas

frillybiscuits · 30/11/2015 18:17

Ha at the people shaming OP for not wanting their MIL in their home and saying they're stopping their OH from spending time with his mum. He can go to her house if he's so bothered

Why people find it acceptable to expect to spend time in people's homes without asking is beyond me

frillybiscuits · 30/11/2015 18:20

I was busy with friends, she didn't ask to come over and we didn't have a relationship. She had NPD and was a disturbing woman, hence EX MIL. Sorry if it's rude to want a choice in who enters my home

abbieanders · 30/11/2015 18:21

I'd be very sorry if close family felt they couldn't drop in without an appointment.

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