Ways in which your life has *NOT* been destroyed since having children.

[Sortedforcheeseandwizz]

Are there any?! Can anyone tell me one thing that makes life with children better/happier/nicer than life before? (Or more than one, if you’re feeling particularly chipper today..)

Doesn’t have to be deep and meaningful, can be anything, big or small!

A combination of social media and a lot of "Just you wait!" people in my life has meant I'm starting to believe that motherhood is horrific and unmanageable. (Some big decisions ahead and having a wobble…)

I laugh a lot more since having DD (who is now 2) I'm much happier and content and satisfied with my life than I used to be. I love having a child and am pregnant with my second - can't wait. I work full time and if I could go part time to spend more time with my DD I would.

There are downsides to having kids of course: less freedom, less sleep, less time. But it doesn't 'destroy' your life. You just need to be ready to make some adjustments. Oh and your DP/DH will too!

Mine are 17 and 19 now, one is at uni.

I was 37 when I had DC1 , I left it late as I had never had a burning desire to have children, nor any interest in children. It was a biological clock decision.
Nothing in my life has been the worse for having them. They are the greatest joy and the best thing in my life ever.
My only regret is not starting sooner and only having two.

On the negative side, it's harder to mumsnet...

We move around a lot and I've met and made friends with so many more people since having her.

The packhorse pushchair is great too, we've started letting her walk more and I had forgotten how heavy my handbag was!

Watching her learn and grow is amazing.

It's improved my relationship with DH, which I though was pretty good before. We get less time alone together, but we use it better. Seeing how great he is with DD makes me love him more.

You get to do crafts and play with glitter. And if it's shite, you can pretend your child made it.

You can do Christmas PROPERLY. You feel like a twat getting excited about Fr Christmas if you are 43 otherwise.

The love you feel for them. My heart could burst with love and pride when I look at DS. Seeing their personalities develop. Doing the smallest, silliest things because they want to and there's no reason why not. DS turned 2 last week. He blew out the candles on his cake 5 times.

Oh yeah, Chrstmas is BRILLIANT.

i am saving up for a trip to Lapland next year for us to see santa.i am beside myself with excitement!!!!

You can have hamsters and guinea pigs without looking like a Mad Rodent Lady - after all, they are the children's...

The laugh, i cannot get enough of her giggles because daddy is doing something silly! In fact being silly is brilliant! Dressing up and making a fool of yourself for fun. She is also hilarious and comes up with songs and rhymes and jokes!
Rediscovering the wonder of feathers, and leaves and animals. I know more about dinosaurs and pirates and the world around me because now we stop and look.
I had terrible pnd too, and I have ME that was triggered by labour, but I'd do it again for her. Not for another one, but for her . She literally is my world.
I adore the little things too- i love you mama, mama thats a nice top, good morning mama.
Everything is new and exciting and it makes it exciting for me. I never thought i could love anything as much as I love that girl.

And their personalities.... I made a very lame joke at the weekend. DS just looked at me and sighed.

Definitely laugh more.

DS is hilarious - and when he beamed at me this morning I melted.

He does adorable things - like wants me to kiss his elbow - and then his other elbow. And then his foot - and then his other foot.

He puts things into perspective too - lots of stuff is just irrelevant now he is here.

You get to do loads of stuff that you wouldn't if you were an adult - most importantly being silly and having lots of fun.

And him saying 'Wow!!' when he sees stuff for the first time is incredible - he said 'Wow!' to the clothes maiden this morning!

Just wanted to say - I'm 26 weeks pregnant with my first and you're all making me feel so much better. I too have been struggling with the "just you wait" people and this is such a lovely thread to read. Thank you.

Being able to stay at home (and MN) not go to work cos someone needs to be around to pick the DC up and be available to pick them up if they're ill at school (anyway that's my excuse).

Doing Christmas and seeing their faces on Christmas morning.

Looking in at them when they are washed and asleep.

The over whelming pride and euphoria of the first few months when they are tiny and cute despite sleep deprivation.

Having an 18 year old imparting words of 'wisdom' that you've told them a million times to their younger siblings and thinking that perhaps you have not completely fucked them up!

Zip slides. I never went on one when I was a child but have been on lots since I had DS. Theme parks - I make myself be brave and have discovered they are great fun.
Disney - through the uncynical eyes of a child - it is magical.
Cuddles, laughter, random singing and dance breaks, a little warm hand slipping into your's and fitting perfectly no matter the age or size

The jokes. Hands down for me right now, its the nonsensical, absurd 'jokes'. Like "why did the bacon laugh?
Because the egg ate a seagull made of glitter"

sometimes.....even after they have been hard work all day.....they just look at you with that face....and you get this overwhelming rush of love and just want to squeeze and kiss their little face!!

They say the funniest things, honestly sometimes DS has both my and my DP laughing for hours!

DS is just the sweetest, specially if hes talking about his baby on the way, just speaks to proudly about it already!

Lego....you get to play with lego again.

watching them learn....DS was 5 at the weekend.....listening to him read is one of my highlights......

first steps, the first time they try food....their first everything is just so exciting......

he has never slept through the night.....5 years of no sleep has left me getting constantly asked if I have a black eye...no my dark circles are just that bad! but here I am pg again and I wouldn't change my life for anything.....

those people who come out with....enjoy it before the baby comes....get ready for no sleep blah blah blah have just forgotten about the good stuff too!

Seeing the world through a toddlers eyes is magical, baffling and sometimes hilarious. The baby stage was a bit pants for me for various reasons but toddlerhood has been brilliant so far. He's just so bloody lovely!

Cuddles and photos ops.

I get to buy every single toy I ever wanted as a kid and play with them, and nobody thinks I'm odd.

I got up and dusted myself off and had to get on with life making an amazingly fun and happy life after I got divorced from an abuser because I had to for the sake of DC who were relying on me.

I get breakfast in bed every single weekend (DC are old enough to make me tea and toast/crumpets/cereal/ whatever takes my fancy). And I don't have to ask they're so proud and delighted to do it bless them.

I always have someone to run up for random cuddles or spontaneous exclamation of affection to me and for me to them.

I can validly have lazy days because we are all tired and just want to spend the day in our PJ's and cuddle and watch DVD's.

I get told I'm a great big sister when out with my DC.
I get told I'm a great mum by random strangers once I correct them that I am the DC mum.

It's lovely to have someone to care for and love.

It's amazing watching DC grow up and blossom into the amazing, kind, young women they are becoming.

I can be the parent I never had to my DC.

This is a lovely thread. I've also been plagued by the "just you wait" people, also 26w pregnant. Thanks MN, you've given me hope!

And the Easter Bunny - it takes very little time to hide some eggs and write some clues yet DS looks sooooo delighted and excited on Easter morning.

also exactly what troubleatmillcock said too.....really puts things into perspective......I see everything in a totally different light and things that used to bother me are just nothing in my life now

big hugs and kisses from amazingly beautiful little people who love going out to tea with me

it makes you more tolerant and reasonable. I gained more perspective once I had kids, I don't get so worked up about trivial things. Work related stuff that scared me (presentations) don't scare me now - my DCs having a high temp/vomiting/random accidents (insert as appropriate) so much more worrying. Before I had DC I spent all my time worrying about my career, now I hardly give it a thought (there are a few downsides to that!).

Your house can look like a bomb went off when unexpected guests rock up and you explain "kids" and get a sympathetic offer of help cleaning your house.

they surprise you, if not daily then at least once a week. How many can adults make your eyes grow wide in pleasant surprise that often?

they look at you like you are the most beautiful, graceful, smartest person on this planet. For a while. But you hang on to that for rest of your life.

you will feel pride unlike any you felt for even your proudest achievement.

daylight savings time - when everyone else feels like they've lost an hour, you still get up at same time but feel like you've had a sleep in when you look at the clock.

I still have great sex Sorry but it needs saying! Don't fear! It does take a while to want it again, but it does come back.

I get lie ins again now DS is old enough to pour some cereal and turn on the playstation by himself. Used to get them on rotation with DH, too, though :)

If you have a good'un, your love for your DH will absolutely blossom and swell, seeing them with the DC, seeing how the DC take after him. Incredible stuff. (And if you don't, which I've also been through, you get to find out the incredibly empowering truth that yes you can do it alone. So even that isn't all bad.)

Kids are hilarious and come out with some hilarious stuff.

You can steal at least 10% of their sweets. It's called the Mummy Tax. When they are under one and bonkers people buy them sweets you can steal all of them. Because they aren't allowed processed sugar yet. It's totally for their own good!

I'm probably more organised and motivated than I would be without. Because I have to be. Probably for other people it makes organisation and getting things done harder but I started at zero, so... there is that.

You get the privilege of knowing this person really well for all of their formative years. Which is cool. :)