To ask your of teenage boyfriends or girlfriends sleeping over?

[Wednesday4thNovember]

It's getting to the stage now where DD wants her DB to sleepover. I'm ok with this relationship and verging on comfortable having him over to sleep but I have younger children and am worried about setting a precedent. I think DC are quite black and white and would see me letting DD1's BF of 7 months sleeping over meaning that their partners of 7 months will be allowed to sleepover. I'd rather judge each relationship by its own merits. How do other MNers deal with this, please?

I have a just 18 year old, I have allowed her boyfriend and her to share a Room/bed since she turned 16 , I have 3 younger children and would allow them the same. Not one night stands but relationships yes. Better under my roof, that she feels she can talk to me and not have to sneak around.
Someone who used to be a good friend of mine used to sneak out of her house, lie, hide because her parents wouldn't let her have a boyfriend over. Her parents reaction was catastrophic for everyone when she fell pregnant, partially because she couldn't talk to her parents and it was all so secret.
So maybe I go too far the other way, but I'd still rather that.

Is it the age that bothers people or the perceived extent of the relationship? Would a short fling at 25 be more acceptable to stay over than a long term bf as a teenager?

Just wondered people's thoughts.

I wouldn't want a succession of people, but then i don't like people staying or visiting here either.

It's not the sex that bothers me. It's the idea of guests often in the house. I'm quite sociable but I'm not a natural hostess and it would irritate me. As a pp said, this isn't a youth hostel. My friend's son's girlfriend stayed over five nights last week and she has had to explain to him that she found it tiresome.

I am 50 and I do remember it not being unusual for 15 and16 year olds to have relationships that became sexual.
A good few of my friends were on the pill, we had good sex education and I only remember one single teenage pregnancy of a girl I vaguely knew to see and who went to a different school. This was highly unusual.
I grew up in the south of Germany in the 70s /80s.
I really do not understand why my children (if they are in love and above the age of consent and using contraception) should not be allowed to experiment sexuallly in a safe and dignified environment.

I remember quite a few friends getting married pre 18 also...

Janeymoo, I am also 51, and had a different experience to you - it was not unusual to have sex at 16+

You have to do what feels right for you/your family/your teen. Obviously!