Use of child death as an analogy for sense of loss should be punishable by wearing a dimwit hat for ever more

[wibblies]

Fucking Liz Fraser in the weekend guardian is the latest in a long line of journalists and writers who seem to think this is ok.

Here's a sample of what she has to say in her article about her sense of loss in watching her children grow from primary age into teenagers:

"When the joy goes - and it does, because life moves on and you can’t play peek-a-boo with a 12-year-old who wants to play Minecraft with his similarly zit-infested mates – it feels like bereavement."

"Those young children are dead now. They are gone."

"The bereavement is long, slow and refreshed every day."

Just so you know, Liz Fraser, watching a child grow up as it gets older is really not anything like not watching a child grow up because the child is dead. I know this, because I've tried them both.

Please tell me I'm not the only one who notices this shit? Please tell me you recognise that it's not the fucking same at all? That it's not even a tiny bit similar and that it's crass in the extreme to suggest it?

I think you may be right laffy I saw no reason for you post to be zapped. I think it may simply be because she is a friend of mumsnet.

Thanks fatty, quite remarkable how pally-wally some of these people are with each other.

She really is vile, isn't she.

Again MNHQ, really?

My post said that the comment had been mostly agreeing with the article which made me think that they had been heavily moderated so that dissenting voices wouldn't get published.

I said I don't have Twitter so wouldn't be going there.

I said the journalist was insensitive.

I said I was sorry for all the people who had lost children.

I said I didn't agree with ANY part of the article. I do not mourn my DCs childhoods, I love them NOW and live in the moment.

Cannot see how any part of that, apart from the C and T words should have been deleted and look how many posts use that kind of language on here and stay unchallenged.

Poor form HQ.

Glad to hear you've deleted the tweet about the article KateMN - hopefully in response to the feelings and opinions expressed here

I agree, laffy. Plenty are called that and worse on here - Liz Jones, Katie Hopkins and David Cameron threads, anyhow?

TBH, I rank this woman right up there with Katie Hopkins and Liz Jones.

I hope she apologises properly.

If not, it would suggest she's just not very bright.

Next weeks column will be all about the nasty abuse (is there any other?) the bored people spitting venom gave, which upset her so much that it felt like a death, the death of a child, an agonising bereavement, etc etc.

Read a bit of the article linked, and felt sick. What a disgraceful comparison to make, what an insult to parents who have actually lost children. Disgusting piece of writing, in my opinion.

Well it's interesting to see MNHQ bias when their "friends" are in the firing line.

Apparently it's ok to spout vitriol when it's someone they don't like and who probably writes for The Fail. Trendy Guardian journalists are somehow exempt.

Again, poor form HQ.

The great thing about Twitter is, even if the tweets are deleted, if someone has captured them they are still there . We can all still see them.

Death of one' s child is the worst possible thing imaginable.I can see how crass and insensitive you see this piece as being
But in the gentlest way possible you cannot own other people's use of mataphor. The emmalemma rant is way ott

She doesn't care and won't see it. She is going to concentrate on how hard it is for HER. Exactly MrsDeVere She'll be off moaning to her editors at the G about the nasty vipers at MN.

Oh, there'll be a spin-off article. She's probably drafting it now.

If we're lucky, it'll take the form of an Open Letter.

What a horrible excuse for a journalist.

What a terrible piece of writing.

What a shit little situation all around and such a stupid stupid response from her on Twitter, her extra digs at people suffering one of the worst things we can suffer.

If something (God forbid) happened to her own kids and she had to bury them, I wonder if she'd compare it to the "pain" of watching them outgrow their old clothes and foibles...

all around.

You are absolutely NBU. What a ignorant and stupid comparison. Having also experienced both I can also categorically state that they are nothing like each other whatsoever.

Fuck right off

No but you can make a judgement about people who use a certain analogy. And then who insist on standing by that analogy- as if it's a feckin great work of literary journalism.
It isn't. It's a classic crappy writing from up my own arse article.

She's still bleating on twitter.

"Seriously, guys, enough now, yes? You've made your point. It was a poor choice of wording. I have apologised. So let's STOP. "

and then she follows it up with this gem

"I also find it odd that writing about how beautiful childhood is, and how I mourn its loss, is NOT OK, but trolling me is"

which proves she's learned absolutely NOTHING...still all about her and her shitty little article.

I feel sorry for Liz in so far as she's obviously missing the past and it doesn't sound like she's having a great time with her DC now. And she probably doesn't see much hope for the future.

But to compare it to bereavement is just wrong. Wholeheartedly wrong. The whole thing is in such bad taste and belittles the hell that losing a child must undoubtedly be.

I'm shocked and saddened at HQ tbh - I never, ever thought I'd be posting that.

and unMNetty to those who have been affected by this

God how crass.

The thing is, we're meant to feel occasional, heartfelt, deep sadness at the the passing of our children's youth. If nothing else, it's a reminder of our own mortality and of how fleeting life is - how it arises, peaks and fades away - and how as our children get older, we get older and march towards our own end.

For people who have buried their children, that natural order has been broken. Nothing feels as it should be. It is not the natural way of things.

Chalk and cheese. Sharing common humanity vs feeling neverendingly isolated from those experiences.

Yes, your children growing can feel like a loss.. just like you can have brief moments of sadness at the end of a good Summer or Christmas, or saying goodbye to a friend or far-flung family member you won't see again for many months or even years... lots of things are LOSSES

AND

Bereavement of any type, but particularly the loss of the beloved child, is a whole different kettle of fish.

The child they once were is gone. They are not dead. You feel sad. You are not bereaved. These turns of phrase make ALL the difference.

I am LIVID at how fucking stupid and insensitive this woman is.