Use of child death as an analogy for sense of loss should be punishable by wearing a dimwit hat for ever more

[wibblies]

Fucking Liz Fraser in the weekend guardian is the latest in a long line of journalists and writers who seem to think this is ok.

Here's a sample of what she has to say in her article about her sense of loss in watching her children grow from primary age into teenagers:

"When the joy goes - and it does, because life moves on and you can’t play peek-a-boo with a 12-year-old who wants to play Minecraft with his similarly zit-infested mates – it feels like bereavement."

"Those young children are dead now. They are gone."

"The bereavement is long, slow and refreshed every day."

Just so you know, Liz Fraser, watching a child grow up as it gets older is really not anything like not watching a child grow up because the child is dead. I know this, because I've tried them both.

Please tell me I'm not the only one who notices this shit? Please tell me you recognise that it's not the fucking same at all? That it's not even a tiny bit similar and that it's crass in the extreme to suggest it?

Whose idea was that to trumpet her 'moving' article, I wonder? Beggars belief that the powers that be on a parenting website can't see that piece for the utter self-absorbed tripe it is.
Wibble, your response is not dispropportionate - it's difficult to think of a response from someone with your experience that would be proportionate and legal.

Beautiful article, I read it blubbing all the way through.

Unless you've been there you will never know that hole that opens up, it is actually physical pain that wracks your body and that bit of you that is now empty and missing forever.

That sometimes it hits you all over again and it's like opening that hole up all over again. My greif often literally brings me to my knees and I'm not strong enough to get back up.

Yeah, that's definitely how people feel watching their kids grow up.

I am going to go against the grain here.She is entitled to her feelings and if she says feels bereaved then she should know!
She sounds a bit needy and mentally unbalanced though.My own 3 older children are 15-20 now and I much prefer relating to them as adults (or nearly adults) than with my 2 'little ones'.For me, it is a tremendous source of pleasure and pride to have created 3 such wonderful young adults who are my best friends too.

Next month, my DD2 turns 10. I've never had one reach double digits. Her elder sister died of cancer 3 years ago when she was 9. Her life is over and mine is fucking ruined. Forever. I will mourn her till I die and the life she did not get to have.

Being here to watch your children grow is a blessing, not a loss.

This women is a c u next Tuesday. It blows my fucking mind that anyone would even think this was comparable, much less write it.

In real life, no one is 'entitled' to FA. That's the way the world works. But hey, at least you know which one's a twat when they out themselves by writing tosh like this.

Nothing new to add, just to send to you wibblies and say I thought the whole article was hateful, selfish and hackneyed when I read it cxx

"No reason"?!

@lizfraser1: @nicky_t @MumsnetTowers Thanks Nicky. Shame some people have to hide behind their laptops and spit venom for no reason! x

Oh the irony

Oh, now poor ickle LF is feeling abused.

Spitting venom?! Is she kidding? Less spitting venom and simply trying to make her realise the difference between kids growing up and kids dieing!

Well, if we're spitting venom the. I'm going with gigantic fuckwit twat.

"Those young children are dead now. They are gone."

That's the line that jumped out at me when I read it at the weekend. Hugely insensitive to people who have actually lost a child and a weird thing for her children to read. She must be a really melodramatic mother to be around.

I can't imagine how painful that article must be to parents who are bereaved. Pain, heaped upon pain. What a silly, stupid woman. She's taken a perfectly normal feeling - a molehill of wistful, bittersweet feeling those of us lucky enough to have children growing up feel - and tried to turn it into a huge mountain of overwhelming grief. A load of hyperbolic nonsense really.

Still, if there's one good thing to come of it, reading this thread has made me realise how incredibly lucky I am to feel that wistful bittersweet feeling. I'll cherish it in future. flowers flowers

It's absolutely not the same. I did kind of grieve for the little girl DD once was when I bought her new pyjamas and I realised that she was nearly the same size as me, but I really wouldn't compare it to the death of a child. Stupid cow.

Oh, I'm not hiding anything, Liz. It's very easy to find out who I am. And I think you're a pretty awful person to write a thing like this. And insulting, stupid and belittling.

Even so, I hope you never come to understand the bereavement that comes from your child's death, it's not something I would wish on my worst enemy. It is a lifetime of loss. That young child who was my daughter is well and truly dead. I have a grave to visit instead of a messy bedroom. You're sickening.

Delete away, it will be seen by many before it is.

Oops of course is what I meant. For those of you who are genuinely grieving lost children.

She's claiming abuse on Twitter now. No evidence that I can see.

Hilariously one of her responses was 'Hater gonna hate' which sums up her writing level.

She's not really admitting any fault, is she?

She's more concerned about MNers being 'nasty' to her

Classic non-apology apology, too.

Oh, people like this never do.