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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

WIBU to ask MNers who think Trans Women are 'Chicks With Dicks' to ...

847 replies

KKCupCakes · 31/10/2015 21:49

Take a look at this article about supporting families of Transgender people by the Gires.org.uk Website to see why that view is so utterly incorrect and harmful?
www.gires.org.uk/assets/supporting-families.pdf

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
venusinscorpio · 03/11/2015 19:15

I think the trouble with the Guardian, particularly, is that half the articles are incendiary click-trolling suite.

At least if GG does do the speech at Cardiff she can make it a short one. "Women and Power - we don't have any". The end.

venusinscorpio · 03/11/2015 19:16

Suite was supposed to be "shite", obvs! Prissy autocorrect!

jorahmormont · 03/11/2015 19:16

God, slugs, that picture made me shudder. The thought of my daughter growing up to have to share a changing room with someone like that.

The comments on it are fantastic. One in particular stood out -

"Am I the only one getting whiplash from the cognitive dissonance here? On the one hand we’re sending girls home from school for showing their collarbones, on the other, we think they should be totes school with getting naked with a fully intact male in the room.".

Doesn't take a genius to see the blatant misogyny there.

venusinscorpio · 03/11/2015 19:21

If you did that, howto, they'd probably say that it was bullying, harassment and discrimination of the trans woman as you only felt the need for a bedsheet in her presence. Your dd would probably be excluded for being such a bigot. It's not so far-fetched as it seems.

venusinscorpio · 03/11/2015 19:24

If any of my Facebook friends posts this ruling as a fantastic victory for civil liberties I am going to have to defriend them.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 03/11/2015 19:26

This just popped up in my timeline.

www.kaleidoscot.com/muslim-trans-woman-attacked-in-sheffield-5502

Very, very odd article. The constant use of trans-woman which is irrelevant as a)I thought trans women were just women
b) The person was wearing a niqab which I would have thought meant it would not be possible to discern the sex anyway.

itsbetterthanabox · 03/11/2015 19:33

I'm interested to know where those who think Tara Hudson should be placed in a female prison think a trans man who has had no genital surgery so has an vulva and vagina should be placed?

jorahmormont · 03/11/2015 19:37

Told DP about the Lila Perry case. He's disgusted.

I think he's hit trans peak too now.

slugseatlettuce · 03/11/2015 19:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CheerfulYank · 03/11/2015 19:53

That's the thing that pisses me off about people saying those who aren't 100% in agreement with things like the Lila Perry case "just need to be educated". No. Bullshit.

I used to be 100% in agreement. I thought that was the thing to be. I would fight any day for LGB, so why not T? It seemed like the logical next step. It was only after being more educated and actually thinking for a minute instead of just mindlessly drinking the Kool-Aid that I sort of said " you know what, no."

I think it was when I saw that they sell silicone penises for trans children born with vaginas to wear. Peak trans for me.

RustyParker · 03/11/2015 19:53

Lila Perry has also been photographed where it can clearly be seen that he is wearing no underwear under a skirt, very clearly seen...

No way if I had a DD would she be sharing intimate space with the Lila Perry's of this world.

ShortcutButton · 03/11/2015 19:54

The comparison with racism makes me fucking RAGE

How fucking dare they?!

Black people have fought for their lives, through history for equality, to be treated like people

Trams women are MEN, they have all the power. They are fighting to strip us of our identity, erode our boundaroes and to force us to believe what is scientifically impossible

CheerfulYank · 03/11/2015 19:56

Although I have to say my.misgivings started when everyone referred to Thomas Beaytie as "the pregnant man" as if he were some mirable of science. It should have been "person with healthy uterus carries child". Wow, what a headline. Hmm

CheerfulYank · 03/11/2015 19:57

*Beattie
*miracle

CheerfulYank · 03/11/2015 19:57

Also

Ubik1 · 03/11/2015 19:58

I just read that R21 blog.

I'm confused. The writer is arguing that gender is constructed. Why then the need to change from one gender to another? Why not make a new gender? 'Trans woman' or 'trans man' ?

CheerfulYank · 03/11/2015 19:58

Oops. Also, my very liberal friend who would fight for the rights of Lila Perry to shower naked with unwilling teenage girls once expressed her extreme disapproval over a woman breastfeeding during a work meeting. Okasayyyy.

ShortcutButton · 03/11/2015 19:59

ALL the TG people in these media cases look like freaks. Without exception. Like that guy of Silence of the Lambs

That Primark one, the swimming pool changing room in America, Tara and this guy

jorahmormont · 03/11/2015 19:59

Oh god the attempts to erase women from pregnancy literature! This campaign to have people referred to as 'pregnant people'.

No. If you are pregnant, you are a woman. Simple as. It doesn't matter what you identify as (I don't identify as female, whatever the fuck female even means, but you don't see me demanding they use 'pregnant people') - if you can get pregnant and give birth, you are a woman, and will be referred to as such.

RickRoll · 03/11/2015 19:59

Lila Perry: imgur.com/zAG0aaY

howtorebuild · 03/11/2015 20:00

Didn't someone say on a thread Plato or Socrates not great on philosophy said there would be a third gender.

slugseatlettuce · 03/11/2015 20:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RickRoll · 03/11/2015 20:10

It's almost like he is intended to undermine the trans cause. Smirking into the girls' bathroom with his dick quite literally in girls' faces, anyone would say this is a form of trolling to show how ridiculous the trans cause can become, but it's taken deadly seriously.

Is there a next stage after boys insisting they have the right to flash girls and violent men demanding to go to female prisons?

mathanxiety · 03/11/2015 20:15

"SettlinginNicely Tue 03-Nov-15 14:21:30
It's beyond ridiculous. In many ways the USA is much more conservative than Britain or Europe. I am surprised they aren't up in arms"

We are unfortunately silenced when something deeply offensive is foisted upon us and called 'progressive'. Look at what happened to Germaine Greer, and the opprobrium that was heaped upon her for daring to speak the truth.

To Peasepudding:
Palatine, Illinois, is not a conservative community at all by American standards or probably any other standards. Northern Illinois and the Chicago suburbs in general, and Chicago itself, tend to be liberal or even 'progressive'. Cook County (contains Chicago and and many suburbs, Palatine included) always votes Democratic. It turned the tide for JFK and is the 'political birthplace' so to speak of Barack Obama.

In American high schools students of all ages can find themselves in the same PE class. A girl of 14 has a very good chance of finding herself sharing a locker room with girls of 15, 16, 17 and even 18. Actually she would have less of a chance of sharing it with 15 year olds as they tend to be the ones doing Drivers Ed, in order to pass driving in school PE class and get their licence when they turn 16. So at age 18 a transgirl could be sharing a changing room and showers with girls aged 14.

The boys' locker room is the appropriate place for someone with a penis and functioning testes. If that is not a congenial environment for someone with a penis, etc., then the people whose behaviour and conception of themselves needs to change are the boys.

This is anecdotal, but my DS and DDs attended a public high school in another Cook County suburb. The idea that the boys' locker rooms would be hostile places for someone Lila doesn't ring true. There were and are many openly gay students and staff in my local school, many openly gay parents. The claim of hostility towards a student in transition (which is not mentioned) rings hollow, from my own personal observation of life in an American HS in an area that is liberal/progressive and middle class

And the claim that boys are socialised to look and be aggressive about that rings sort of hollow too. Nobody wears a school uniform, nobody expects girls to cover themselves any more than weather conditions warrant. There are dress codes in most suburban Chicago high schools that feature bans on offensive slogans on clothing, no dirty or torn clothing, no underwear worn as clothing. But in reality, boys and girls alike wear clothes that reveal their underwear - boys wearing low slung jeans and sweatpants and shorts and girls wearing high cut tops, tops with spaghetti straps, etc. So you can look but the idea that a girl is fair game because of the way she looks is not one that schools or communities condone at all.

This doesn't mean that a transgirl wouldn't cause upset and distress in a girls' locker room, however. Many girls at first experience a bit of discomfort peeling off everything even in front of other girls, dealing with menstrual issues in showers, dealing with the issues raised by the body shape problem, etc. They learn to get on with it and accept each other. The presence of a male would add another layer to the difficulties. Why should the girls have to accept someone who is actually completely male into their space where they have worked to establish their own co-existence and where they have their own community based on their own female sensitivities? This is not about m-f modesty, though modesty comes into it, and imo rightly so. It is about a female space and a female community being invaded. You have only to look at the debate about manspreading on public transport to understand what women and girls are angry about, not to mention concerns about ogling, about groping, and about sexual harassment.

It is not a 'tough one'. If the atmosphere and attitudes in the boys' locker room are causing problems for someone with a penis then it is the boys who have to change and re-examine their behaviour and thoughts. The great thing about high schools in middle class liberal America is that this can be done.

And another anecdote -- it is very difficult for anyone to use the loo in my DCs' high school as passing periods between classes are just over four minutes long and being tardy has consequences. The whinging from a teenage boy that he finds it difficult to use the toilets makes me throw up a little in my mouth. One of my DDs got an infection from holding it in, because her schedule meant traversing the length and all four floors of the school constantly one semester.

Another fact about American high schools -- you can't leave. If you live in a school district then you go to the public school in that district. The only way to leave is to move to another district or pay through the nose to go to a private school, assuming there is one available, which is rarely the case apart from major urban and suburban areas. So students in a district that has a transactivist foisted upon the girls are trapped.

This entire situation can be summed up in the phrase 'shutup bitch and make me a sandwich'.

HairyLittleCarrot · 03/11/2015 20:19

Imustgodowntotheseaagain Tue 03-Nov-15 18:49:30
Some conservative cultures, even here in the UK, will only allow their daughters access to HE if they attend an all-women college.

Cambridge has a couple of woman-only Colleges. There have already been cases of male-bodied trans women applying to be placed at those Colleges for student shadowing. If male-bodied trans people win places at these colleges there will be female students who will be unable to attend as a consequence.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rachael_Padman

Newnham College is female only. When Germain Greer objected to a M2F transwoman becoming a fellow there, a huge furore erupted and Germaine resigned from the college administration.

Some of the rationale behind women only colleges includes the enabling of women to succeed in male dominated disciplines such as physics, where women are discriminated against and opportunities reserved for men.

Rachael Padman had benefited from a lifetime of male privileged support as Russell Padman, gaining his degrees, his phD in astronomy (whilst at the then all male St.Johns College) and research fellowships that paved the way for a future career denied to so many women. Then, as Rachael, she accepted a fellowship at the all female Newnham, a position reserved for a woman, ostensibly to demonstrate to future generations of young women how it is possible for a woman to achieve success in a male dominated world.

Which of course it is. If you were first born a male.