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AIBU?

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Original poster

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?

685 replies

squoosh · 27/10/2015 13:17

Risk of being thrown in the Tower/put in the stocks and all that malarkey if you refuse.

Today I think I'd go for Ralph Fiennes. Look how pretty he is. Yes he's all tortured and angsty and probably ponders endlessly on his 'craft' (yawwwn) but he's just so alluring.

No doubt he'd be a tad high maintenance in the long run but for an enforced torrid affair I think he'd do very nicely indeed. Plus he's probably into all manner of eye popping sexual shenanigans. And let's face it, what's the point of a torrid affair without some eye poppery. Am I right?

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
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WhatTimeIsItCuckoo · 28/10/2015 18:46

Oh yes wouldn't he Beetle. I can't believe it's taken me until now to mention him! A while back, after watching him in Skins Rise (I think it was that one) I had the most inappropriate crush on him. He was so naughty and gorgeous in it, he made me feel all unnecessary Wink.

Lynnm63 · 28/10/2015 18:46

Id like Matt Bomer ... Please
Brad Pitt from the mid 90s Meet Joe Black /sleepers
Henry Cavill is hot too.

Nathan Fillion i know someone who worked with him said he's a right tit put me right off him.

Third photo always amuses me.

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
evenoldergregg · 28/10/2015 18:49

WhatTimeIsItCuckoo, we're collecting a fine pack of men between us! Christopher Walken is more than welcome to join. My next nomination is Stephen Rea as Santiago in Interview with the Vampire.

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
RaspberryOverload · 28/10/2015 18:49

SparklyTinselTits Looks like I have some catch up TV to watch.

In the name of serious research, you understand. Grin

WhatTimeIsItCuckoo · 28/10/2015 19:01

Do like Stephen Rea as an actor evenolder but he isn't really torrid affair material for me, so I guess you can have him. My next nomination however, and I think he was mentioned much earlier in the thread, is Gabriel Byrne, particularly as Dr Paul Weston in In Treatment. Now he's someone I'd happily go into treatment for (swoon).

MamaLazarou · 28/10/2015 19:02

Joaquin Phoenix

CurlyCustard · 28/10/2015 19:32

I'll have ian somerhalder as well. Those eyes.....

isambardo · 28/10/2015 19:38

How has no one snagged Rafa Nadal and Roger Federer yet?! They are both mine, mwahaha!

I'll join the queue waiting for Daryl Dixon too.

If only I could pluck a character from a book, it would be the Count of Monte Cristo. He would be awesome in the sack.

Libitina · 28/10/2015 19:49

Tom Hardy (minus the beard).

Peach1886 · 28/10/2015 19:56

Ray Winstone of course...yum, yum ...

CurlyCustard · 28/10/2015 20:09

Oooo Raspberry I'd love a Till and Richard session.

ragged · 28/10/2015 20:10

I have a major weakness for ugly men. Don't ask why, I know it's madness. I like good-looking blokes too, Aiden Turner & Cumberbatch & Bradley James to name a few.

Someone already said Bobby Carlisle & I'll add Wilhem Dafoe to my list.

RaspberryOverload · 28/10/2015 20:21

This Rammstein love is getting fun. Definitely looking forward to Download now. I'll have the Ollie/Christoph sandwich, then Grin

CurlyCustard · 28/10/2015 20:30

Raspberry have a fantastic time at download, I saw them in 2012 while pregnant with dd and they were amazing. Gutted I'm having to miss next year but seeing as they've been in the studio I'm hoping for a tour in 2017. Got to ask though what about Flake and Paul?!

squicketysquack · 28/10/2015 20:35

Only read the first three pages, but no - one has mentioned Ryan Gosling. Are you all mad???

RaspberryOverload · 28/10/2015 20:43

CurlyCustard Have to say, Flake & Paul don't quite do it for me, and Till isn't high up the list either, just the other 3.

And I've never done Downoad or any festival before, (last gig was 20 years ago) so at 47 this is a new experience Grin

Meanwhile, my 12 yr old DS has rather taken to Rammstein (but I have skipped some tracks in the car and not downloaded all of them to his MP3, by the time his German is good enough, he'll be old enough for the missing stuff).

evenoldergregg · 28/10/2015 20:46

I adore Gabriel Byrne WhatTimeIsItCuckoo and strangely enough often confuse him with Stephen Rea! D'ya fancy a bit of Daniel Day Lewis?

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
CurlyCustard · 28/10/2015 20:49

Raspberry he has excellent taste. Dd who is three now loves them....I'm going to.Have to take her to see them Smile

WhatTimeIsItCuckoo · 28/10/2015 20:58

Oo yes even and just today, via mumsnet actually, I was introduced to his son Gabriel, also yum. Young, granted, but I can dream Wink. Meanwhile, countdown to Dominic West in The Affair at 9pm - yay! (My original choice before I got completely carried away).

flightywoman · 28/10/2015 21:00

Has anyone claimed Mathew Baynton from Horrible Histories? He's got a great nose...

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
gobbynorthernbird · 28/10/2015 21:01

Method Man about 15 years ago. Ezequiel Lavezzi. David Belle. Because I know they'd all be filthy dirty.

flightywoman · 28/10/2015 21:05

OH MY GOODNESS! No one has mentioned Laurence Fox. That means HE'S MINE ALL MINE...

Move over Billie Piper!

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
RaspberryOverload · 28/10/2015 21:05

Curlycustard If they tour in 2017, I'll get DS and me a ticket if they come to the UK. Have PM'd a download question so as not to sidetrack thread.

flightywoman · 28/10/2015 21:08

Very many years ago me and my friends had debate about Liam Or Noel (Gallagher).

One of them said that Noel would be gentle and a bit romantic and probably write you a nice song. Whereas Liam looked like - and I quote - "he'd bang you like a storm door in the wind".

NigellasGuest · 28/10/2015 21:15

This is an old photo but i still would

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?