My friend always comments negatively about my DD's name on baby name board

[JoanGalt]

One of my close friends is on Mumsnet and I know her username. She doesn't know I know it and I don't look at her threads or search for her or anything.

I was looking at the baby name board and saw a thread about my DD's name so I had a quick look. I saw that my friend had commented, saying how she really didn't like the name. That's fair enough of course but I then did a search for other threads containing that name and she had commented on every single one saying how she hates the name. It's a classic but unusual name like Octavia. She hasn't commented on any other threads unless my name is mentioned and then she says how boring she thinks it is (another unusual name).

I think this is a bit odd really. AIBU?

It's quite controlling though op. Why must your friend like your dds name anyway?

My friends have called kids names I can't abide but I wouldn't tell them and I certainly like the kids and my friends.

I think she will definatly see this thread and quite frankly steer clear from you.

I would. Sorry op but you sound high maintenance and controlling. Not saying you are but that's how it's coming across to me anyway.

Controlling my arse....

How exactly is she controlling because she is puzzled by her "friends" outspoken dislike for her childs and her own name in social media?

Quite Quint. This is AIBU though.

Is it just me wondering if AnnaMarlowe is the OP's friend. Looks like she might be trying to tell her something?

I would never tell my friends I hate a name they gave their child.

On an anonymous forum I would be honest with a poster asking about the same name though. This would in no way be an insult directed at my friend.

Because the op feels her friend must like her dds name and her name come what may! Why should she? If she was so rude as to tell her to her face then that would be hurtful but this is supposed to be an anonymous forum.

So what if she posts she hated the names! She isn't intentionally hurting anyone least of all her friend as she has no idea her friend is bloody stalking her like this.

Op get the thread deleted and concentrate on what really matters which is what your friend is like to you in real life.

I don't think the OP is saying that her friend must like her children's names at all.

Me too Bambambini

I do think its very controlling to advance search someone on a supposedly anonymous forum and then police what they are saying.
Fine to let someone know that you have recognised them immediately but bad form to bring something posted on here into real life-and its such a trivial matter anyway.
It makes you sound slightly stalkerish OP

I have a friend whose daughters name I don't like. I'm not particularly fussed on my friends name either and I don't like her husbands name. If these names come up on MN I do comment on them - in a I'm not fond of that name, it doesn't grow on you kind of way. I don't love my friend or her children any less, I just wouldn't call my kids those particular names. How do you know she doesn't name change for different parts of MN/threads - you mentioned that you see her comment on those names more often than other threads - what you see is her commenting on those baby name threads with that particular user name.

There are MNetters who comment less than positively on my kids names, they have way too popular names I'm sure some of my friends think the same way - they can comment on a social media site anonymously until the cows come home. You should have messaged her right away that you'd recognised her - not waited until she said something you don't like.

It's quite controlling though op. Why must your friend like your dds name anyway?

What a load of nonsense. The OP found it odd that friend has did this so much about the names, - as do I and other people. At no point did OP say her friend HAD to like her DDs name either! This isnt controlling behaviour in the slightest. Talk about an over reaction.

Bambambini

No not me! Not unless the OP has changed lots of details about the two families.

I'm a serial name changer for this exact reason. I don't want anyone to be able to advanced search and see 9 years of posts.

My inbox is also happily empty.

I do understand why you are a bit peeved about it Joan but I really wouldn't overthink it.

We all make judgements about our friends all the time it's just that you don't usually find out about it.

This is terrible but I can't stand my Dnieces' and Dnephew's names . I call them by cute nns (hope their parents think they're cute too). If anyone asked on the baby name board I would say I don't like them. It's an anonymous forum where we are meant to be honest, so I am.

Glad to hear it AnnaMarlowe (or NOT, as could have been a good bun fight! )! And i agree, it could be as simple as you earlier posted - or friend silently hates her! Wonder if we will ever know!

Ok controlling may be unfair but it's wierd that the op cares so much and takes it so personally. And advance searching is very ott.

I bet her friend would be devastated if she knew that this thread existed and it was about her.

Honestly op I would get it deleted.

I am also guessing that she may find the thread, the thing is you haven't actually said anything bad OP so I wouldn't worry about it too much. You are allowed to be at the amount of times she appears to say she hates all the names of your family dying to know what these names are now.

Oh and how this is controlling I don't know! Some people will declare that anything is controlling.

Maybe you could do a poll, list your names and hers, without telling us who's is who, and ask MNetters which they like the best .

justmy and vwxyz may I suggest you rtft, if that's not too controlling?

I just find this very particular situation a bit odd, nothing more. And quite a few of you have given very reasonable answers as to why it might be this way.

Who knew baby names could be so exciting.

People on AIBU can be so hysterical it's funny. Controlling? Stalkerish? Jesus Christ.

Already read it.
Okay "stalkerish" a bit OTT but still think its unfair to message her if she thought she was posting anonymously.

Joan Baby Names is my favourite board, gets me more get up than AIBU. I still haven't recommend reed from the number of MNers who though that Huckleberry was a fine name.