Dear son please remove your...

[bananaandcustard]

little blue can of lube from the bathroom. I assume you and your girlfriend used it this morning (during Saturday kitchen, btw we turned up the sound on tv to stop our ears burning) and forgot to take it back to your bedroom.

As you are so careless with your more 'personal' items I feel quite at liberty to also mention that you do need to make more of an 'effort' with your girlfriend, rather than rely too heavily on lube.

Thanks for that son.

Pasithea that is way more disturbing than anything else on this thread.

This thread is reminding me why my children simply won't be allowed to live at home in adulthood

You can use lube for other things though right, like a boob job or those feet fetishy people probably need lube. God knows my feet are like hooves.

A tube of KY jelly fell out of my handbag when I was rooting in it for ink cartridges during a very important work meeting once.

I tried to explain it was for my DCs hearing aid (this is true. It makes the ear mounds more comfy) but of course they didn't believe me...

I'm turning inside out with The Cringe just remembering it...

Moulds not mound. It sounds vaguely filthy saying I need KY jelly for my mound

"DS! Is this your lube in the bathroom or your father's?"

I've also just remembered my mum found the KY jelly in the changing bag when looking after baby DC ( same reason! Hearing aid moulds!) and asked me with genuine confusion "why do you carry superglue in your nappy bag?" I love my mum

Is anyone else thinking of that episode of Gavin and Stacey now? 'LET'S HAVE THE RADIO ON!'

Mainly wrong because surely it should be on the shelf by the bed....just saying.

Time for the two of them to get a houseshare then.

I'd go fucking spare if I could hear my kids or they left stuff like that around because it's disrespectful.

Have you not told him this?

Yep I agree, that's Saturday Kitchen ruined now.

You can use lube for other things though right, like a boob job ?

KY jelly enhances breast contour ??

Obviously he can have sex in the house he lives in. He's 22. But loudly enough for anyone else to hear (especially his parents) when he knows they're there is pretty disrespectful

KY jelly enhances breast contour ??

[slathers tits in lube]

Boon job = tit wank

BOON not boon

I think wine meant titwank

BOOBS !

Beaten by Glo

I'd take it and put it in your bed side table OP and leave the door cracked open so he can see it. Maybe stand a toy next to it? If he asks just say,"Yes son, your dad was a bit dry last night" and wink.

Grilledaubergines, I almost inhaled my wine reading that! Lmao!

Ahh sorry yes that's what I meant

Noooooooooooooo

I think wine meant titwank

What a disappointment.

I was hoping it was some Mumsnet tip on the viagral like effect of KY jelly in lifting boobs and counteracting sag.

Well I'm not sure what I'm going to do with this crate of KY now.

OP's ds can help you with that, fastday!