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AIBU?

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Original poster

To have told my niece I'm not mad on her choice of name feel a bitch

490 replies

Everythingwillbeok · 16/10/2015 12:21

My niece has a little boy, 6 with a "normal name" popular and nice.
She's due in about 7 weeks I think with a baby girl. She lives about an hour away so don't see her loads, we've just chatted on the phone and she's mentioned her choice of name. I really wish I'd have said oh that's cute or something and as we were on the phone could probably have got away with it.

But I think I went quiet and said "oh right....Mmmmm I'm not mad" argh I feel like a cow, it's nothing to do with me.

My sister(her mother) has just text me saying I believe you don't like daughters choice of name, she's offended.

How can I put this right, we aren't particularly close but I really don't want to make anyone feel bad,especially when pregnant.

It's just a silly name, sorry but it is.

OP posts:
Tootoofunny · 17/10/2015 04:24

I hate myself for posting this because I have a general dislike of the 'writer' but is possibly a useful pov for OP and DN

m.smh.com.au/it-pro/a-bogan-name-is-a-life-sentence-20120212-1szp2.html

kungpopanda · 17/10/2015 04:33

Stoic, should parents make decisions on the basis of the world as (some people think it) should be, or as it is?

Or, to put it another way, would you call your child Kandy-Rain?

TheStoic · 17/10/2015 04:40

I don't like it, so I wouldn't call my child that name.

But if I liked a name that others didn't, I definitely wouldn't change my mind because some people are assholes and bring their kids up to be assholes. God no, what a depressing thought that would be.

mammmamia · 17/10/2015 08:30

Kungpopanda I don't disagree with you about the name and I for one immediately got the semen reference and I'd be informing the niece if this was me.
It was the reference to suicide and young children I found offensive but you don't seem to have picked up on this.

TheCatsMother99 · 17/10/2015 09:16

On my phone and it's not letting me read all the replies but could you pretend you knew someone with that name who was a complete cow and that's why you're not mad on the name, but on reflection it is actually a lovely name?

And apologise profusely for your verbal diarrhea?

TheCatsMother99 · 17/10/2015 09:19

Oh Lordy, I've logged on on my laptop & seen the replies & the name.

Nope, you're going to have to completely ignore my suggestion unless you work in the porn industry or know some strippers!

EternalDalmatian · 17/10/2015 09:28

I think you did well with your response op. If it was me, i'd have probably laughed loudly thinking she was taking the piss tbh.

One of my cousins had a baby recently. I won't post the exact name - but she wanted to use her dad's initials. So for instance AJ. I know a couple of people named 'Adam John' who get called AJ or 'Tony James' who are called TJ - fairly normal.

Except she chose to spell it out on the bc. So the kids name is actually Ay-Jay. I shit you not. My face must have been a picture when she told me...I think I managed a 'Oh well that's different isn't it?'.

SoupDragon · 17/10/2015 10:08

I do wonder if the people on here socialize because they have no skills for friends outside the internet.

Well, you're here too so...

SoupDragon · 17/10/2015 10:12

Even as an adult I would hate giving my name because there was always a pause in which I could hear the person sniggering in their head. It was like a millstone round my neck. You only have to looked at the threads on here joking about Drew Peacock to know that a stupid name is a bad idea. And effectively calling your child Spunk is a stupid thing to do.

noeffingidea · 17/10/2015 10:33

When I was expecting one of my kids I decided on a name, when I told my friend she said she didn't like it. Why? Because it was the name of a well known serial killer. Did I get offended? No. I thanked my friend for reminding me of the association and changed my mind.
I think the niece needs to grow up a little. She should really consider the whole picture - what associations the name might have, what other people might think and what the child themselves might think. It's not really just about what she thinks is cute or pretty.

overthemill · 17/10/2015 10:59

everything I wonder if you should message your niece and say you mentioned the name to someone and they told you what it means and you were shocked so thought you should tell her. Or maybe get someone else in the family to do so if you feel she might get upset by you saying something else? It's an awful name and no one would want to be saddled with a name that means that. It really does need telling. It's hard as you are close to DN but she must be quite young and naive and I can't imagine how much harder it will be for the child growing up. I'm sorry that lots of posters have been mean to you though

AnotherTimeMaybe · 17/10/2015 11:07

Interesting name... How old is the niece? I wonder if OH agrees with the name!!

Tbh reminds me of North West (kardashian's daughter )
YANBU!

Original poster
Everythingwillbeok · 17/10/2015 11:31

My neice is 3O. I did say her age early on but I understand not everyone RTFT. Thanks for everyones comments,to be fair on the whole everyone has been nice just the odd couple saying im a troll as I posted on a Friday? That I found weird. Anyhow I don't speak to DN much so maybe next time will be November ish. Im hoping by then the name may have had a rethink!

OP posts:
AnotherTimeMaybe · 17/10/2015 11:40

Im hoping by then the name may have had a rethink!
It might not, don't loose any sleep over it, let her find out the hard way

summerainbow · 17/10/2015 13:01

I think you need to say that the reason you are little taken back by the name is that your has just her statford bull terrier puppy the same name.

LeftMyRidingCropInTheMortuary · 17/10/2015 14:54

There's a toddler in the Daily Mail today called Minnie-Beau.
She is a beauty pageant child, believe it or not!

Booyaka · 17/10/2015 15:19

The sex workers from that brothel Lamar Odom overdosed in are called Cherry Ryder, Sindy Sky, Jade Capri and things like that. Kandy Rain wouldn't look out of place in that list. Sorry, just sayin'.

Treysanatomy · 17/10/2015 15:55

I'm still sniggering at Maud-Lynne Grin

AnemonesCloser · 17/10/2015 15:56

Maud-Lynne's parents must be goths!

LittleLionMansMummy · 17/10/2015 16:23

I'm just impressed you refrained from laughing op. Quite a measured response in the circumstances!

StrawberryTeaLeaf · 17/10/2015 18:20

to be fair on the whole everyone has been nice just the odd couple saying im a troll as I posted on a Friday?

OP they were joshing. Honestly Smile

PegsPigs · 17/10/2015 19:09

Can't someone else show her the link to candy rain on urban dictionary? That name is AWFUL!

quietbatperson · 17/10/2015 19:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrMartin · 17/10/2015 19:33

Hi Guys. My wife just read me this thread and I felt the need to create an account with Mumsnet specifically for the purpose of saving this poor child. OP, please point out to your niece that Candy Rain is in fact a porn blog title written by women for 'women who love the Dick' and possibly would not give the child the best start in life.

And I know this because I googled it, not because I'm into porn (much).

Please save this child.

quietbatperson · 17/10/2015 19:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.