Who is BU? Me or DH (Childs birthday related)

[catgirl1976]

DS will be 4 in November

There are lots of things he would like for a present (thanks adverts )

However, I've narrowed it down to:

1. A bike (big present)
2. Paw Patrol Look Out (fecking over priced for a bit of plastic but he loves Paw Patrol) and
3. A Hot Wheels Robot thingy he keeps seeing on the TV and loves and which would add on to his existing Hot Wheels Track

I mentioned this to DH and he felt it was OTT and DS should just get 1 single present.

I think that's mean. Left to me he would get the 3 things above and then some little presents too (couple of books, new colouring things or some craft stuff etc).

I can wind in the extras (though I think they are fun) but I don't think 3 presents is excessive and I think for a 4th birthday, one single present seems a little bit lame.

I appreciate DH doesn't want to spoil him and I'm not keen on those huge piles of presents you see on boasty Facebook posts, but I think 3 presents is fine.

DH is really adamant that 1 present is enough. I think he's being mean. :(

We can afford the 3 presents listed above so it's not finance worries on his part, just a desire not to "spoil" him.

Who is being U (or mean)?

The only thing we have always said is a bike isn't a gift, it's just something a child needs as they grow up

In my world a bike is most definitely a gift!

I think one present is a bit mean aswell!
Growing up I always had more than one present from my parents (birthday right before Xmas) and I never expected more and more gifts as I got older!

Just wondering why people buy more at Christmas than for their kids Birthdays - seems a bit backwards to me, I have always made their own day the priority.

Because they choose to. Does it matter?

I always found Christmas a hundred times more exciting than my birthday as it was a shared experience with siblings and friends that built up over weeks to a wonderful crescendo.

Loved birthdays too (still do even though it's against MN rules) but they were a more gentle occasion.

No sqoosh it doesn't matter, just asking that's all. To me it's more important to celebrate the DCs Birthdays than a religious festival.

MN are notoriously competitively parsimonious when it comes to presents for children. Just wait till Christmas and the explosion of "how much do YOU spend?" threads.

I wouldn't get only one present, it's ONE day of the year that's just about him. I like to spoil my kids a bit on that one day. If get him what you said initially

It's not a religious festival for everyone, more a midwinter one.

Ok I know I'm too late but what you originally wanted to get was fine! I don't know a single person who gets their child 1 thing for their birthday. I know parents that go overboard by a ridiculous amount but no one gets 1 thing. I think that's incredibly mean.

We got DS a bike at 4 (may have been 5) for Christmas. We knew it wouldn't be used then but he still loved it and we just took him out when we could. He did learn to ride on that one and we got him a bigger one last year. Ok bikes may not get used all the time but kids love them.

Getting a present that you can only use outdoors when it's nice and have nothing else from your parents is mean tbh. It isn't setting him to experienceect loads every year. My DCs get £100 spent on them. With the cost of toys it doesn't go far but they are thrilled with what they get, they like a pile to open, Ok the pile will be smaller for DS as he wants more expensive things now but I still couldn't give 1 thing.

I don't know a single person who gets their child 1 thing for their birthday. I know parents that go overboard by a ridiculous amount but no one gets 1 thing. I think that's incredibly mean.

Would you get a grip of yourself Crap! 'Incredibly mean' to 'only' get a child a bike. Cop on.

I've just read the Amazon reviews of the Paw Patrol tat - it sound fecking terrible. I wonder if I can talk DS of wanting it? Probably not, but £50 odd for some plastic that breaks and doesn't even stand up seems wrong!

Could you maybe get him something else Paw Patrol (sorry have no idea what it is!) like a cuddly toy of the characters instead?

It sounds like a cuddly toy would last longer than the plastic rubbish they are peddling!

I want a Paw Patrol thing!

I think your original presents were fine, if you can afford it which you obviously can.

But in the interests of compromise I would do the bike and a few small presents.

My DS who's 6 loves his character cuddly toys, Super Mario, Sonic, Minecraft etc. he plays with them a lot more than the figures of the same thing.

crapbag you now "know" one person who got their dc one present for his Birthday this year.. ME

My ds asked for one present.. he didn't want or need anything else. A pile of presents would have been pushed to one side in favour of the one present he did ask for.

Now to shock you further the present only cost 16 euro

My dc are made to feel special everyday of their lives and to do this I don't need to lavish them with gifts.. even on their birthdays!

op the paw patrol lookout is a piece of plastic tat. I'd agree with others and get the cuddly toys instead. Santa is bringing Rocky for ds

Just to go on a bit about balance bikes...both my grandsons had them for third birthdays and both were riding pedal bikes without stabilisers by 5.

No I don't. I don't know anyone on here. I am talking about the people I know in RL.

And squoosh, no I don't need a grip thanks all the same. It's not the same as people who can't afford it, that would be different, the OP stated they could afford it and I think it is mean in their situation to buy 1 present that can't actually be used for the majority of the time and not get 2 things that can be played with all of the time (not debating that Paw Patrol thing, my DD wanted that and I flat out said no as it looks absolute crap and like an expensive glorified slide for some plastic dogs for the bargain price of £50!).

I'm afraid you do need a grip for your outraged 'incredibly mean' comment.

ONE present for birthdays?! Shit, really? I'm pretty skint but will always buy mine a few presents (I save throughout the year). Once I bought 6 presents and panicked it would look like a pathetic pile.

But then I don't do parties...

I'm with your dh. One present for birthdays and you'll be looking for ideas for Christmas shortly.

DD is an only child. She gets a small stocking of "bits" (new PJs, DVD, book, chocolate coins) at Xmas only. A token gesture. No Santa gifts. No presents from DH's family and only a small gift from my parents and sister.

She gets things throughout the year (bike etc) and had probably £100 worth of actual stuff for her birthday plus an expensive trip to a theme park (no party). I don't think that's anything like excessive.

Ha! My kids have always had a special Birthday breakfast, whatever they want for dinner on that day, and then the choice of a present or party from me. They get lots of small gifts from other people (and far too many if they choose the party) and it has never been an issue.
I can't believe that people on here are saying it's mean not to provide a pile of gifts!

I would get the bike for Christmas and the other two things plus bits for birthday.

I don't know anyone in real life that only buys one present either.

I think you are being U and even if we were rich, I wouldn't give my dc all that for their birthday. I give them more for their birthday than Christmas because there is only them to buy for, it's a simple matter of finances. I think you might find that if they get too much, they are overwhelmed and don't play with the things or appreicate them as much as you think they might.