Thanking people (wet tunnel scenario)

[squidzin]

Hello.
I often enjoy an afternoon walk with my baby in pram. Sometimes we get to a rail bridge / tunnel bit, quite low and thin, about 10 metres long.

We've had a lot of rain, so today there was a huge muddy puddle with only a slim stretch of gravel path to the side to go along unless you want to walk through muddy water.

So today, I was about half way through the tunnel walking through with pram along skinny bit, and this bloke appears at the other end, who sees me, so waits before coming through.

I prefer to avoid eye contact at all costs and tbh was more worried about my pram tipping than anything so trundled along out of the tunnel.

I hear this tutch and "SAY THANKYOU"... I just looked back and gave a confused look to this bloke who was I presume just avoiding getting his feet wet. It certainly was not a "give way" situation. Just self interest.

Anyway it got me thinking, sometimes I dont always thank people who stop driving at the zebra crossing if I am already walking across because basically they legally have to if they want to avoid running someone over, but I have seen other ppl do this.

I do always thank eg shop assistants for giving change back though, and waiters etc, and am not like a generally rude person.

Anyway, would YOU have automatically thanked the man on the other side of the tunnel? Would you have shouted at someone for not thanking if it were you?

I think he was a bit out of order tbh.

I would have said thank you sounds like him being patient and waiting made things easier for you.

Yes I would have thanked him.

And a thank you costs you what exactly?

I would have thanked him yes but in his position I wouldn't have said anything

Definitely would have thanked him. I thank or apologise to everyone. Terribly British.

He was a little rude, yes, it wasn't compulsory for you to thank or even acknowledge that he'd been considerate and done something nice for you. But it would have been polite of you to smile, say thanks, or even just say "the state of that path!"

Yes, I would have looked at him, smiled and said thank you.

I'd have said thank you to him.

He's probably fed up with being a generally polite person who gives way without others acknowledging it. I'd be a bit irritated as well.

The fact that you avoid eye contact at all costs doesn't dovetail nicely with my idea of being a polite person, but it's not impossible.

I always say thankyou, depending on what mood I was in I would have said the same as the bloke did to you. I find that sort of thing extremely rude, not saying thankyou when I give way (car or pedestrian) is my biggest pet hate!!

I might have done, automatically without thinking, but as you were there first anyway, technically as you say he wasn't doing you a favour, just waiting his turn. So he was being rude in my opinion! I do usually say thanks at zebra crossings though (but I wouldn't think twice if someone didn't thank me when I was the one driving).

I'd have thanked him and I think people who stop at zebra crossings. makes their day better, costs me nothing. He was being considerate and you could have made him feel good about it. Makes the world better.

You didn't need to make eye contact and why on earth would your pram randomly tip?

I would have said thank you. Manners cost nothing.

Even if it's not strictly necessary I would rather say thank you than not, because I'd rather be too nice than not nice enough, IYSWIM. It's all a part of treating others as you would like to be treated.

Thank him for what? She was already half way before he appeared. He was waiting so HE didnt get his feet wet. He did her absolutely no favour.

I'd be annoyed too and would have thought you very rude. I don't understand people who don't say thank you. It's two words, how hard can it be?

Sorry, I didn't read it properly. In that situation I would have still said a quick thanks (just because it's polite) but then I'm from a small village where everyone smiles and says hello to each other as they pass.

If I was the man in that situation I wouldn't have expected a thankyou though.

I also avoid eye contact. Even with people I know well.
But I still say thank you. And I would have done to that man too.

Possibly with a friendly comment of 'watch out, it's deeper than it looks at the other end' or something.

I'd have made eye contact and made a comment about the state of the path - not really a thanks as such but an acknowledgement of his existence. Or I may have just have automatically thanked him as I am inclined to do in most situations - habit!

I would have said thank you. I get terribly wound up over lack of manners -I will always hold open the school gate for people with pushchairs for example and the odd one will just pretend I'm not there and breeze through with not a word or smile. What does it take to give a smile or nod your head or say thanks? Nothing. He held back for you to walk through first instead of barging through rudely on the dry side. Yes, maybe it was to avoid him getting wet feet too, but so what? I think it wouldn't have hurt you to acknowledge his presence.

So do you feel great that you didn't thank him which costs you nothing.

Thank him for what? She was already half way before he appeared. He was waiting so HE didnt get his feet wet. He did her absolutely no favour.

And yet giant swathes of the population are seemingly unable to grasp that you should yield in such circumstances. People just barrel into obviously limited spaces all the time. Refraining from doing just this marks you out as a polite person.

I would have definitely said thank you - I think you were rude sorry.

I would have said thank you, although it's not the worst thing that you didn't. When you hold a door open for someone and they don't say thank you, now that's fucking rude I am insanely polite though.

I did think "wet tunnel scenario" would be something altogether more spicy.

I would have said thanks. He did wait for you! He could have been really rude and just started going through the the tunnel and you could have had a standoff

I am very English in my politeness. Manners cost nothing, as my mum always taught me.....