To ask you to tell me what om earth dh means?

[Shanolyooo]

Long conversation last night about money/ childcare/ jobs. Background- dh and I earn equally , ds is 5 and DD 10 months. I'm on 3.5.days though so salary is pro rataed down, if that makes sense. Could anyone help me work out what he means, I'd be most grateful.

Conversation below is in response to me saying I'd like to go up to full time , DD is 10 months as we need the money. Him: 'I'd be really disappointed if dd was in nursery more than 3 days a week.'

Me- would you like to work part time then?

Him: 'don't be ridiculous. I have much greater earning potential than you (true- I'm public sector, he's IT). In fact you should invest in me and support me more, if you want me to earn more'

Me: 'I simply can't do anymore than I do- I do the majority of the child rearing, admin and housework, as well as night wakings. How can I support you more?'

Him: if you supported me more, I'd make more money. Think about it.

I felt he was emotionally blackmailing me.

Too harsh? Is this a reasonable conversation that other couples have? I had to change topic and wander off before shouting something incoherent.

"Also hilarious that he thinks he's some up and coming moneymaker but is too tired to do either more work or more anything in the evenings. It's hardly the Alan Sugar or Richard Branson model of success, is it?"

Ha! this made me chuckle!

You are brilliant OP !

now place marking......as I want to hear about what the DH has put on said spreadsheet

It's a continual dance. Been married nearly 18 years and we still take a twirl around the floor over exactly these issues. It's not a deal breaker as long as you never let it slide and give in. Every time he does this come back hard and strong and you and your marriage will prevail. You'll be fine.