to think I'll never have swooshy hair

[katemiddletonsothermum]

How do these girls do it? I was following a girl the other day (in the street, not stalking!!) and her beautiful hair, full at the crown, in a pony tail, went SWOOSH to the left, SWOOSH to the right. It was a sight to behold.

My own hair has a mind of its own. If I try to use volumising mousse and put it in a pony tail then I look like Princess Anne. My hair is full at the sides and limp at the back. I've tried different blow drying techniques, I've tried rollers, but no. I will never have swooshy hair.

I worked with a lady who had beautiful swooshy hair. I asked her how she did it and she said "Oh, this old mop? I just washed it and let it dry naturally." NO YOU DIDN'T, YOU BITCH.

How? How do you do it? Come on wags, teenagers and lovely haired people. Tell me your secrets

Some of us were discussing on the 'Annoying OP's who don't return to the thread. AIBU to think mn should zap those threads?' thread and it was agreed that threads like yours in AIBU really grips people's shit.

HTH.

I have swooshy hair. Bouncy, chocolate colours, shiney, glossy and thick. If left untamed, it is frizz bomb central.

I wash it every day. El Cheapy Shampoo and Conditioner a L'Oreal one). A trick I was taught is to leave a trace of conditioner at the ends and do the final rinse in cold water.

I leave it as long as possible before blowdrying (first a single pump of hair oil, concentrating on the ends). I blow dry in sections, using a paddle brush first, concentrating the nozzle on the roots and do two inch wide sections around my head. Hair drier nozzle always pointing down.

The a round smoothing brush just as it's nearly dry. On the ends to smooth under. Still in sections. Small squirt of root lifting spray on the crown. Blast it with cold air to set it.

Then I leave it while I finish my make up.

If it needs it, a very light run over with the straightener and a tiny bit of serum if required. A light spray of Elnette.

Takes me 20 or so minutes every day.

Swoosh!

I take it you don't have swooshy hair then, fanofspam?

fan has one single wiry hair sticking upright and not swooshing anywhere.

I have long thick swoosh hair.

Rinse, rinse and rinse again. It won't swoosh if there's any trace of product still on it.

Then dry in sections not all in one go.

My pubes are fairly lustrous but if I was in doubt about their swooshability - or if I was compelled to grieve publicly the lack thereof - I would not post in AIBU.

Thank you singlepringle I've tried that and the top and sides look great but the back is flat flat flat. I'll see what the straighteners can do.

Can you all guess that I never had a sister to teach me these things?

Wellastrate and a very clever hairdresser. Worth every penny. Previously Crystal Tips, now...swoosh!!

Where would you post then Fan? I reckon MN could cope with a whole 'hair laments' section - non-swooshy, thinning pubic, excessive facial etc. or, of course, the 'inane bullshit' which is, erm, most of the other topics... I like discussing inane bullshit.

my hair is flat as a pancake... except when i use this, then its swooshy swooshy compliment central.

www.boots.com/en/Pantene-Pro-V-Dry-Shampoo-Volume-Booster-180ml_1527762/

I like it because can just put on the 'problem' bit (for me its crown) so get volume where you need it. Worth a shot for £3.99, & much less work than blowdrying properly...

threads like yours in AIBU really grips people's shit.

Scroll on by vinegar tits! You aren't duty bound to comment on every thread.

HTH

My hair swooshes but I think that's because it's so long.

fan I refuse to comply until I've seen your 'thread police' badge.

Clip in hair extensions, half head. Dye them the same colour as my hair dye on my hair.
50 quid and lasts about 3 months.

specialsubject - I've googled wellastrate and you can buy it on amazon but not at boots, is this right?

I'm going to annoy spamthingy and now announce that I'm going out shopping, thereby proclaiming that I have nothing better to do with my life other than have nice hair and spend my husband's money.

In my defence, I feel like doing something nice as I had a mammogram yesterday, thereby announcing my age. Perhaps it would have been better for the thread to be called "AIBI to want swooshy hair when I'm an old bint and should really cut it off and go to a granny salon for one of those styles made with really tight curls"? Is that better?

And a very gentle backcloth on the crown obvs

Back comb ffs!

OH NO!!! I look like a birds nest. Like the female bus driver from South Park. FML. The ends have gone all raggy. What have I done wrong?

I have swooshy hair but it's actually a frizzy mess. Swooshy hair just means thick hair which can sometimes be a nicer way to say hard to manage

My 12 year old has really swooshy hair. And he's a boy...

Mine is fairly swooshy. Wash and rinse well. Decent conditioner for dry/old/abused hair.

Brush it when it has dried, while running around getting small people to the right places.

Good rinsing I think is the key.

I thought that all hair swooshed when in a pony tail?

Dry your hair upside down. Then put a bit of something near the roots to hold the lift. Lasts most of the day for me.

My hair is a fine as a baby's. It hates heat styling and tangles at the drop of a hat. I still insist on having it long and striving for the swoosh. I would never back comb it mind you.

I envy anyone with bouncy, straight, shiny hair (ie: DDs 1, 2 and 3 !!). Lovely healthy hair is very youthful looking.

I would love swooshy hair. Instead I'm blessed with not too bad hair that I can't go out in any sort of humidity or the likes without it looking like a blonde afro that hasn't seen a brush in a month even if I lovingly round brush blow dry it for aaages

I have very swooshy hair- it does that swinging thing and gets caught in car doors and hits people in the face and they get cross.

It lost its swoosh after two babies and I used Nioxin shampoo. It may have come back anyway, but I was really impressed with how much thicker my hair got again.

What is this swooshiness you all speak of? I'm fairly certain I don't have it. But can you post a picture of ultimate swooshy hair please?

There are some YouTube tutorials on how to dry your hair to get it swishy and just stepped out of a salon etc.

There is a salon in London called blow where you can get your hair blow dryed all swooshy very quickly. Like a speedy nail bar, only for hair.

Sadly, only my leg hair is swooshy nowadays.

I'm pregnant and can't reach to shave properly.

Try Kerastase - pricey, but swoosh-worthy if you buy a good brush to blow dry with too.