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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU about dds nursery staff having lovebites?

134 replies

AmIBeingATwat · 10/09/2015 17:41

I need to know if im being a twat or not in thinking like this as im really tempted to email the nursery.

Dd goes to a nursery who pride themselves on being professional, outstanding and providing the best care possible.

Dd loves it there, the staff are very on the ball etc etc.

Last week when picking dd up i noticed a staff member in her room has a love bite on her neck. I was alittle taken aback, but very quickly forgot about it.

Now i ve just picked dd up and another member of staff in her room is displaying two small love bites on her neck!

I feel its really unprofessional and i want to send an email off to the manager that they should be covered during working hours.

AIBU?

OP posts:
ChickenTikkaMassala · 10/09/2015 18:38

Get a grip OP.

MaudGonneMad · 10/09/2015 18:39

how disgusting that your looking after my child like that.

What a bizarre response.

TenForward82 · 10/09/2015 18:40

Another poster asking AIBU who, despite being told by the majority, doesn't believe they are BU. Why do people bother to ask?

The kids don't know what they're looking at. It's not evidence of some hideous moral decline by the staff. It's none of your business. End of story. Find something else to pearl-clutch about.

Feckingfeckfeck · 10/09/2015 18:43

I have a huge one on my neck from my daughter.... Shall I not look after her anymore because I'm cheap and now unable to look after a child? I'll call in sick to work while I'm at it...

mrspremise · 10/09/2015 18:44

Chikdren do sometimes give them when they find out they can and it can be difficult to get the little vampires off you! I suspect that there is a serial offender in the nursery as there have been several close together, iyswim...

Runningupthathill82 · 10/09/2015 18:47

I currently have what looks like a massive lovebite on my neck.
It's actually a mark from where my rucksack strap rubs against my neck on my run home from work. It will NOT shift!

So yes, YABU.

BeverlyGoldberg · 10/09/2015 18:48

If only I had some pearls to clutch!

As long as your child is being well looked after and is happy I would be ok about it. Yes it's a bit tacky but we've all made mistakes.

I've currently got a patch of eczema on my neck and I hope no one thinks Mr Goldberg and engaging with each other inappropriately (will no one think of the children).

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 10/09/2015 18:54

Goodness you have had a verbal beating havent m you, therefore I'm not going to add to it. I'm kind of divided on tghus. Yes I fully agree. It doesn't look professional, but she/he are entitled to a personal and love lif.lif

Original poster
AmIBeingATwat · 10/09/2015 18:55

I do agree they are entiitled to a love life etc but despite what i think, i wont mention it to the nursery.

OP posts:
bearleftmonkeyright · 10/09/2015 19:10

Ill never forget my mum waking me up one morning when I was a teenager and she had a lovebite on her neck she noticed me looking and said oh look what your father did to me! She scarred me for life bless her, So maybe thinking about it yanbu!

NotMeNotYouNotAnyone · 10/09/2015 19:13

Yabu

It has no effect on the kids, they don't know what it is so even if they notice, it doesn't matter.

Booboostwo · 10/09/2015 19:22

Completely bonkers reaction OP. It is normal to have love bites and normal for these people to have sex. Do you expect only celibate people to look after your kid? The only unprofessional thing about love bites would have been if they had been getting them from their partners during work, anything else is none of your business and you will come across as loony complaining about this.

sproketmx · 10/09/2015 19:30

Yabu. It doesn't really impact on their ability to care for the children in the nursery. I understand you don't really like it but it's hardly something that you should push for them to face a disciplinary over. I personally don't like like the way one of the girls who is a playground supervisor at our school dresses like she just walked out of psychedelic yarn bomb or how she calls the kids 'dude' but it doesn't affect her ability to do her job. I wouldn't write in about it

catfordbetty · 10/09/2015 19:31

OP, you are entitled to your high standards but I think you will be increasingly disappointed by the world's failure to live up to them.

ImperialBlether · 10/09/2015 19:35

I think it does look really tacky - I can't believe people saying it's not. Where the hell do you work that love bites aren't discouraged?

OP, I would speak to the manager about it. If she wants a professional image, she'll have to re-educate her staff.

TidyDancer · 10/09/2015 19:37

This is the most ridiculous thing I have read on MN in ages.

Of course YABU OP.

MaudGonneMad · 10/09/2015 19:38

I burnt my neck with a curling tongs recently, it looked just like a love bite for weeks. I didn't care, although people like the OP might have thought I wasn't fit to be lecturing to their precious DCs...

weeblueberry · 10/09/2015 19:40

I can't believe numerous people have told you their children do it and yet you still think it's impossible one of the kids has done it. Hmm All it takes is for your toddler to nuzzle you then get a bit overexcited.

I'm surprised at the extreme reaction tbh.

definiteissues · 10/09/2015 19:46

Yabu.

They are entitled to have a life.
And as numerous pp have stated they aren't necessarily love bites

saoirse31 · 10/09/2015 19:48

Yabvu, crazy!

Iggly · 10/09/2015 19:48

The children won't know what a love bite is.

They're not giving love bites in front of the children

So what exactly is the problem here?

starlight2007 · 10/09/2015 19:51

YABU.. however can I just add..It took my DS about 4 years to notice the woman had a hand missing on Cbeebies...Don't assume they are interested in the same as you..

Aeroflotgirl · 10/09/2015 19:55

Op, you have said, the staff are wonderful, on the ball, dd loves it there, so what!!! Now if dd had marks on her that would be a different story.

msgrinch · 10/09/2015 19:55

Yabu get a grip. They're not giving your child a love bite! its really none of your business and nothing to be so precious about.

maybebabybee · 10/09/2015 19:55

Utterly ridiculous. Of course YABU.