To be ashamed of what poverty has reduced me to?

[iAmSiri]

Today I took a big wad of loo roll from a public toilet because I didn't have the money to buy some.

I struggle every week to make ends meet and today, although I fortunately had money to feed dc, it just wouldn't stretch to include toilet paper.

Op you should not be ashamed. You should be proud of how you cope week in week out.

Your ex and this fucking government should be ashamed.

Ok you won't accept money or shopping, fair enough.

Can I take you and your kids out for a day if we live close enough? My two would love the company. And I can drive :)

Anyone suggesting that people on benefits shouldn't have broadband - if you don't do the mandated amount of online jobhunting, as set out in the agreement they make you sign at the job centre in exchange for those benefits, you can get sanctioned. This happens to people who don't have access to the library or job centre computers for the necessary amount of time, and it also happens to people who just have no clue how to use a computer, and nobody to show them how.

If sanctioned, you get no money for the punitive period, which is usually weeks on end. Nada. (And this not being entitled to benefits affects your housing benefit too, if you rent. Hello, homelessness.)

Not having broadband if you're claiming can actually lead to genuine destitution. Not big or clever as a moneysaving suggestion.

OP, have you got a copy of Jack Monroe's cookbook - low cost and yummy recipes? I bought one and then was given one as a present, and would be happy to pass one of them along to you. And yep, CAB have food bank vouchers to offer, plus can offer a benefits checkover to ensure you are getting every penny you're entitled to.

I have done this when I had DD at 18. I was so poor that I couldn't afford to eat and buy loo roll.

I haven't read much of this,but picked up on the pets bit.

When I was in need,the PDSA performed a necessary operation on my dear old dog.They are an amazing organisation.

I've skim read now.
Wrt electric -in the past I've found electric companies can be remarkably good at helping you if you are straight with them.
If you're not on a key meter,try not to.I went for 3 weeks with no electric because I couldn't feed the meter.Then things like eating cheaper food gets harder.
I well remember the days where the 2 days before my giro,I didn't eat,and to get warm I'd go for a walk and scan the gutter for coins.
You are not alone,op.

Jack monroe's recipes are online as well. www.agirlcalledjack.com
Jack lived it herself so she knows what she's talking about
Can also recommend www.moneysavingexpert.com (if you haven't already found it OP)
They have a lot of tips and advice , they sometimes have vouchers and money off codes for things as well.

You must be entitled to the warm home discount off the electric company surely? It's £140 off the winter quarter.

The water board do something similar, think it's called water sure.

There's so many inspirational posts on this thread, its almost an honour to be able to read them.

I hope waking up today feels a bit different op, and you dont feel so alone. Hold your head up high, you are doing your best and it'll show in your kids xx

This has probably been mentioned on the other threads, but most supermarkets do basic nappies for around £1.40. I think Sainsburys still sell sanitary towels at 15p , Morrisons at 14p.
I've used most of the basics toiletries and cleaning products and they all do the job.

I use the tesco smart price sanitary towels, they are longer than morrisons. Asda dont sell them anymore.

OP I've not read the whole text but please don't feel any shame. A genuine offer to help here - whereabouts are you? PM me if you'd rather not say. I have a friend who works for a local soft play area and regularly offers free tickets (it's large so suitable for differing ages). I also have access to a warehouse card and thanks to a few special offers and an obsessive DH I have a silly amount of basics in my garage. Genuine offer to drop them outside your door if your close.

www.gov.uk/the-warm-home-discount-scheme/what-youll-get

Oh and another friend works for a large Pharmaceutical company and has ridiculous discounted items
Like toothbrushes, paste, sanitary items. DH has prepared for a zombie Apocolypse and the stuff is falling out of my cuboards. You'd be doing me a favour OP.

Hang on in there my lovely.

Bollox - just seen your location. I'm in
South Wales. PM me address please - toothbrushes are as light as a feather - I can send on loads. Please.

Siri I'm also north west (Manchester)

My offer of cleaning products stands (washing tablets, fab con, bleach, washing up liquid, sprays etc)

Please PM me if it could help you in any way x

Can I take you and your kids out for a day if we live close enough?

That's very nice of you.

I was going to say I'd happily transfer a few quid OP!

In our area children who get free school meals are also entitled to a free lunch in he holidays I think it's via vouchers check at food bank

I haven't RTFT, do we know roughly where the OP lives?

You sound like a lovely person and a wonderful mother OP. Your post has really touched me and reminded me of a situation I was in a couple of years back.

I hope things look up for you soon, you have no need to feel ashamed, you should be immensely proud of yourself for doing your best.

I sincerely hope that things start looking up for you soon

I'm so so glad that MiscellaneousAssortment and others have been on to point out to some of the ignorant fuckers misinformed that the government considers internet access key to getting out of poverty!! Idiots.

OP, you have nothing to be ashamed of. You are dignified, and fabulous and I take my hat off to you.

Fortycoats from your username, and your use of the vernacular, I'm assuming we're from the same place. So in that spirit, God Bless you and God Bless your mammy. I'd say she's fierce proud of you. You sound brilliant.

mate, dont feel ashamed. Ive nicked toilet roll in the past. Poverty isnt a crime. Its unfortunate but hold your head up high. You didnt choose this situation. Noone will miss a bit of loo roll, and you will get back on your feet again. You will x

Thank you Middlings

Ye'll have a cup o' tae, won't ye?

I love to see a spirit lifted through sharing experiences and offering support and encouragement as opposed to the "sure it could be worse, couldn't it?" line that so often gets thrown into the mix. It's a kind of 'suck it up' attitude and it helps nobody, serving only instead to take all validation from them and their very real worries.

It's like you and me both being in separate bodies of water. Neither of us can swim. My water is only 20ft deep but yours is 40ft deep. You're not in a worse predicament just because your water is deeper - we're both struggling to keep our heads above water. That's the fight: staying afloat. Encouragement helps you swim to a safer depth. It doesn't change the depth. You're still doing the work but you're not alone.

Hope you're feeling better today OP

OP, I'm in a similar position to you at the moment. It's shit, isn't it?

A couple of lovely posters posted me nappies a few weeks ago, to help tide me over until my IS claim was processed. I felt so grateful and yet utterly humiliated that I was in that position. I've also nicked loo roll on numerous occasions!

My claim is now in payment, so things are a bit more on an even keel, but I live in fear of something breaking or my kids' feet growing. I am snappy with them when they won't eat all of their food (have been to the food bank a few times recently), and feel awful when they ask for snacks that I can't give them. The school holidays have been really hard - my parents too them away for a week which I really appreciated as I just haven't been able to do anything with them otherwise and they are bored to death.

Some people just don't get it, do they? I have a mobile phone which costs me £7.50 per month with giffgaff. The phone itself I bought two years ago when I was working. Am I supposed to sell it now? Never mind the fact that I will then be unemployable as I can't looks for work/speak to employers without it! My friend, who is pretty well off, sympathised with my situation, then said it sounded like I needed a holiday - and then proceeded to text me various foreign holiday details to try and get me to go with him! I kept saying but I have NO MONEY, he kept saying 'Oh well just pay me back when you can'. Not going to happen! He isn't in the real world at all...