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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Woman on train

261 replies

holidaysareoverated · 12/08/2015 20:57

DH and I took our toddler on the train today. The train wasn't super busy but there were no free seats so we walked to the next carriage. A woman and her teenage daughter were sitting at a table for four. So we approached and asked them to move over so that we could sit in the two free seats.
The woman started sighing and eye rolling at her daughter as though we were being complete pains in the arse. I told her that she was rude and entitled and asked if she expected the train to herself. Her daughter then started saying " she only sighed, she is allowed to sigh". The woman herself remained silent and then said exasperatedly "there's so much space!", which there was in the aisles. There were no other free seats at all.
AIBU to have fantasised about spilling my coffee all over them? I can't believe she thought a pregnant woman with a toddler should stand up so that she and her daughter could have a table for four to themselves!

OP posts:

TenForward82 · 12/08/2015 21:46

OP: Where did I say we wanted to sit together? You've made that but up! She was blocking the other free seat and we POLITELY asked her to move, either to let us get to the free seat or to sit in it herself.

Ohhhhhh, I didn't get that from your post, misunderstood. In that case she was very unreasonable.

EmmaU123 · 12/08/2015 21:46

But that is you! I wouldn't, and haven't allowed anyone to barge me out of the way, nothing worse than pushy London people but they won't get away with it with me!

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 12/08/2015 21:47

If it's reserved it's mine and pity help anyone who gets in my way

OttiliaVonBCup · 12/08/2015 21:48

It's a funny day on MN today.

Emma, have you ever considered it's you the smelly one, and that's why you get your precious two seats?

balletgirlmum · 12/08/2015 21:48

Emma has to be a wind up. People would ask the conductor to intervene & she would be moved or thrown off the train.

And I'd gladly pay to watch it too!

Andrewofgg · 12/08/2015 21:48

The seat next to you is not your personal space, Emma. I would just sit next to you if I chose to.

Peacheykeen · 12/08/2015 21:48

Yanbu the woman sounds like a bit of a twat its public transport ffs. Good on you for sticking up for yourself how embarrassing that her daughter had to stick up for her. It was completely unnecessary of her to sigh . Silly cow

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 12/08/2015 21:48

So Emma would you really tell a heavily pregnant woman or a disabled person to stand just because you don't want to sit next to someone else?

Icimoi · 12/08/2015 21:48

Emma, you're talking nonsense. I do not believe that you would stand all the way through a long rail journey even whilst pregnant or feeling unwell rather than sitting in the seat you've paid for. And the mere fact that someone is sitting in an aisle seat does not automatically mean that they don't want anyone sitting next to them: it may be that they simply want to sit there so that they can get in and out easily to get to the buffet or the loo, or it may be that the person who was sitting in the window seat has disembarked and they can't be arsed to move their stuff over.

And, of course, if they don't want someone to sit next to them that does not mean that every other passenger has to accede to their wish. If it bothers them that much they should travel first class.

EmmaU123 · 12/08/2015 21:49

Both! What I'm interested to know is why would anyone want to or forcefully push themselves next to a total stranger who clearly does not want that person to sit next to them? I find it a little strange if I'm being hoenest, and there's nothing wrong with standing up you know.

ilovesooty · 12/08/2015 21:49

But that is you! I wouldn't, and haven't allowed anyone to barge me out of the way, nothing worse than pushy London people but they won't get away with it with me!

So it's pushy to expect to sit in an unoccupied seat on public transport? What do you do if people actually try to do so?

WayneRooneysHair · 12/08/2015 21:49

I'd move you if I had to Emma, you can choose to move willingly or not but you would be moving.

EmmaU123 · 12/08/2015 21:50

And I'll say it again for Andrew's benefit.....you wouldn't!

Xenadog · 12/08/2015 21:50

To anyone who says people don't want to have their private space invaded they are talking rubbish. It's not private space on public transport when 2 people are sat at a table for 4.

I HATE other people sitting near me on public transport but I would always move over/bags/coats etc to allow others to have a seat. After all I didn't pay for two seats did I? OP you are so definitely NBU!

Belshels · 12/08/2015 21:50

i would be irritated if someone said "can you move over" whereas if they had said "would you mind if we sit here?" or "please would you mind moving over as I don't think i can manage to stand" or something similar, it would be fine. If you did say it politely then I think she was out of order and I may well have reacted like you!

WayneRooneysHair · 12/08/2015 21:50

And there is something wrong with standing up if you find it difficult.

TheBookofRuth · 12/08/2015 21:51

Maybe the odious Emma is in fact the smelly one, and that's why no one's that fussed about challenging her to the spare seat?

OP, yanbu, and well done for calling the woman on her rudeness. If more of us did that there'd be less of it!

LumpySpaceCow · 12/08/2015 21:51

Jumping in on the thread but I'm thinking that maybe Emma is one of the smelly, old people that she is trying to avoid.....that's why she is never challenged

EmmaU123 · 12/08/2015 21:51

Wayne that would be classed as assault if you physically touched me without my consent, so good luck with that!

fastdaytears · 12/08/2015 21:52

Emma is clearly winding us up. All those "pushy London people" trying to sit down in empty seats. How dare they.

ilovesooty · 12/08/2015 21:52

And I'll say it again for Andrew's benefit.....you wouldn't!

Rubbish.

balletgirlmum · 12/08/2015 21:52

i look forward to hearing of your next encounter with the British Transport Policecthrn Emma when you refuse to do as the conductor asks.

fairnotfit · 12/08/2015 21:52

Oh bless... Emma, if you're lonely, there are easier ways to get your fellow travellers to strike up a conversation. Have you tried Tindr?

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 12/08/2015 21:52

What I'm interested to know is why would anyone want to or forcefully push themselves next to a total stranger who clearly does not want that person to sit next to them?

Probably because it's the last empty seat and they want to sit down.

there's nothing wrong with standing up you know.

In that case, why don't you stand up?

Also not everyone can stand, e.g people with disabilities.

So I'll ask you again - would you seriously tell a disabled person to stand just because you're a special little snowflake who doesn't want anyone sitting next to her?

WayneRooneysHair · 12/08/2015 21:52

Yes I would Emma

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