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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not like other children commenting on the size of ds's penis

249 replies

BocaDeTrucha · 06/08/2015 00:04

We're on holiday at the moment and ds is a chubby little 22 months old so most of the time naked. In the last 2 days I've had the following comments: "why is his willy so small?" from a little girl, about 4 years old. And today, the little boy in the bungalow next to ours who has spent 3 days playing with ds, asked " is 'Bob' a boy or a girl?" and when I replied he was a boy, the little boy said "so why doesn't he have a willy?".

Gee, it's not that small!! I got a bit peeved but dh just told me to stop being ridiculous. Am I being ridiculous?

OP posts:
AlanPacino · 06/08/2015 08:33

I was brought up in the UK and am not prudish, I don't think most people are.

TheCowThatLaughs · 06/08/2015 08:46

Is your ds toilet trained op?
If he is I can't see the problem, except for him getting sunburnt

WilburIsSomePig · 06/08/2015 08:53

A naked toddler is weird? Nope, not seeing that one at all. I'm sure he's absolutely fine but if you're worried just stick some pants on him. Kids ask all sorts of questions don't they.

KinkyAfro · 06/08/2015 08:53

Have people not read the OP and her updates, she's protecting him from the sun, I'm sure she's not going to let him get sunburned FFS

Babymamamama · 06/08/2015 09:03

The others day I was at the local paddling pool in our park. An under three naked proceeded to do a sizeable poo. Under the water. Friend fished it out as parent nowhere to be seen -so unpleasant and could have been avoided by use of swimmers nappy. And there are actually signs up saying all children must be covered but many parents ignore the signs. I always kept dc covered in public areas at least on the bottom half when they were little. It's different if you are in private garden or whatever but with strangers around I would be too worried about inappropriate adults around. It's not like we dont know nowadays how many risks there are around.

AngieBolen · 06/08/2015 09:04

Maybe the OP's DS is really dark skinned, but having worked as a nanny in Spain , there is no way I would let a 22 month walk around uncovered during the summer months,which is why I commented. The OP has made it clear she isn't letting her DS get burned.

The thing is kids will call a spade a spade, and one of my DC has a body part which I don't like other DC commenting on so, rightly or wrongly I keep it covered.

The question is't whether or not its reasonable to let a toddler walk around naked, but whether the OP should mind other children making comments.

Lookingforwardtoholiday · 06/08/2015 09:11

Put some clothes on him, no need to be naked and anyway at 22 months I would have had mine in UV suits. Unless he's potty trained it's a bit yuck to leave him without a napoy

Notso · 06/08/2015 09:11

There's nothing wrong with being naked. However I don't think it's a good idea to put sunscreen on genitals and damage from the sun is a real issue.

PurpleSwift · 06/08/2015 09:12

Put pants on him. And sun damage can occur at anytime of the day, letting him run around naked won't be doing him any good.

Idontseeanydragons · 06/08/2015 09:15

It's a little odd that some posters are assuming the OP isn't putting sunscreen on a toddler in the sun just because they're letting him run around with no pants on Hmm and I'm guessing a 2 year old boy doesn't need to be 'made' to go anywhere naked...
OP young children have no filter whatsoever, you only have to look at any thread about embarrassing children to see that they are pre programmed to say whatever pops into their heads!
Just ignore and enjoy your holiday, with or without pants Wink

Singsongsung · 06/08/2015 09:28

The point is that sunscreen alone isn't enough on a naked child. There's no way that anyone is able to cover ever inch of a child (ESP a busy 2 year old!). Wearing clothes is a key part of sun safety- not just sun cream.

SideOrderofChips · 06/08/2015 09:39

Mine are covered up if its hot and they are out. Not because of social norms around being naked out, but because i don't want them to get sun burnt...

scarletforya · 06/08/2015 09:44

Are you in a communal area? I would expect a nappy on him, in case he wees or poos. Are you cleaning it up?

ShadowStar · 06/08/2015 09:47

You can still get sunburnt while wearing sunscreen if you're out in the sun for too long, particularly if you're near water where it can get accidentally washed off. I once got a very bad sunburn as a child when abroad on holiday, despite having been liberally covered in sunscreen at the start of the day.

Gileswithachainsaw · 06/08/2015 09:55

At home fine, but unless he's potty trained I don't think having him run around free to soil where he stands is particularly nice for others.

He really could use some loose cool clothing to help with sun protection as sunscreen isn't always enough.

The idea of a naked toddler though- no big deal.

Kids will point out what they see. could he a dish could be a bird could be a willy. and compared to their dad's or older brothers yes it will be smaller so don't worry about it

AlanPacino · 06/08/2015 09:55

I can see why I rarely ask for advice on MN. Too many posters appear to have their own agenda to post to regardless of the actual query in the op and assume anyone who posts is neglectful/stupid. Sigh.

Mermaidhair · 06/08/2015 10:01

I didn't realise chubby babies were unable to wear clothes.

Loafliner · 06/08/2015 10:17

Nothing wrong with a naked toddler but I can understand why you felt a little offended op by the comments but it's just how small kids are...they comment on everything - they haven't developed an edit function, bit like some people on this thread. Grin

pieceofpurplesky · 06/08/2015 10:28

There is nothing wrong with a naked toddler and my ds when that age wandered around home naked. I do however hate seeing naked toddlers out and about in the sun. I don't know why - I just don't like it. Maybe it's the sunburn thing? I spend most summers I. Spain and in the heat of the day rarely see naked toddlers ...

Jo4040 · 06/08/2015 10:28

Posting is scary...I once started a thread about low self esteem... By the end of the thread I'd been interagated, pulled apart and criticised. I felt like I'd been in a virtual lion cage with added tigers and wolves. If I had low self esteem at the start of that thread, bloodyhell fire...by the end I was nearly suicidal. Nothing I said could make anything right!

TheRealAmyLee · 06/08/2015 10:33

Just put underpants or a nappy on him and it will stop. I also would put a nappy on as it's a super sensitive part of the body to expose to the sun.

HeighHoghItsBacktoWorkIGo · 06/08/2015 10:40

Just thinking of the OP, if you are relaxed enough to let your toddler run around naked in public and interact with other kids (and I personally don't have a problem with it) then you have to also be laid back about the silly comments other young children may make. If the comments make you feel uptight, then you have to be uptight enough to put pants on him. You can't have it both ways at once, iyswim.

HuftysTrain · 06/08/2015 10:42

It's unhygienic because he's probably not potty-trained. Is that so hard to grasp? Ever heard of decorum?

OP, children say all sorts of mad things, you sound quite ridiculous to have even registered the willy remarks. Why would you even care?

Writerwannabe83 · 06/08/2015 10:50

This thread has gone insane.

Back to the actual point of the thread:

I have a 19 month old and he is currently being investigated for problems with his testicles and I'm always worried about the shape of his scrotum and wonder if his penis is small.

It doesn't matter how young or old a child is, parental concerns about any aspect of their physical appearance can be very worrisome. None of us want our children to be ridiculed. My worries now are because I'm worried about my DS's future. I don't care about the appearance of my son's genitals but I'm pretty sure he will care when he's a teenager and that is what I worry for.

My DS is seeing a surgeon in two weeks about his testicles and I know I won't be able to stop myself from asking about his penis size too.

If the comments are upsetting you then keep your son's genital's covered. You will be doing the right thing to discuss it with the doctor if only for your own peace of mind.

Idontseeanydragons · 06/08/2015 11:02

A 2 year old is perfectly capable of being toilet trained. As for a sense of decorum in a 2 year old - good luck with that one!
Any thread that started with 'AIBU to think that a 2 year old should have pants on and show some decorum on holiday' would get rightly laughed off the board.