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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU for not wanting my MIL to discuss Jesus and heaven with my 5 year old?

999 replies

Spearshake · 04/08/2015 13:29

I was just having breakfast with my 5 year old son and he asked me, 'do only people who love Jesus go to heaven?; I asked him who told you that.
Unfortunately, my tone must have been a bit sharp (hey, first thing in the morning) so he said, 'I don't know'

(I know it's his grandma though (my MIL) because she has been staying with us for the last week and we haven't been in contact with anyone else who is likely to make such comments) Unless he has been on the evangelical channels again

The problem is that I am an atheist, so I have a tough time with such discussions. He asked me what God is the other day, and I asked him to wait until his father gets home and he can answer (he was brought up more religiously than me)

Any ideas from fellow mumsnetters of a similar religious (or non-) bent on how to deal with such ideas would be most welcome.

Thank you!

OP posts:
LemonCream · 05/08/2015 22:49

From one of your "articles"...

Others have a strong faith and are confident that this has been integral to their work, which has been guided at crucial moments by an external power

They may not talk about "imaginary friends" but they certainly believe in them.

Mehitabel6 · 05/08/2015 22:51

She started with ' I think it must be quite hard for children to keep track of things' - I disagree - they can manage . She then went breezily through a list - maybe she had a proper discussion, but on the thread it sounded very dismissive. .

LemonCream · 05/08/2015 22:51

And if there is a God, him that did turn out be his son told us that we will receive eternal joy AFTER our death

Only if Stitching's friend was a Christian.

And you've got to be quite a wanker to invent cancer in the first place.

Mehitabel6 · 05/08/2015 22:52

Of course they do- there is the entire cross section - as there is in the general population.

Mehitabel6 · 05/08/2015 22:52

You seem to have cherry picked the ones who think like you and ignored the others!

StitchingMoss · 05/08/2015 22:55

She was brought up a Christian, in a stifling childhood that did so much harm to her she rejected the church all her adult life. She rediscovered it weeks before dying as she was fucking terrified and had all her relatives keening by her bedside about god and heaven - I think even I may have cracked.

She was 44. God's a wanker.

As for praying - reminds me when we were going through IVF. Dh's boss was very religious and our first two cycles he had his prayer group prayer for us every week throughout the cycle. Both cycles ended in m/c. Dh didn't tell him about our 3rd and we were successful. Doesn't prove anything but just thought I'd share.

LemonCream · 05/08/2015 22:56

No cherry picking. That was just the most recent I looked at and it was still up so I c/p'd it.

But none of them offer evidence or even sound argument. A scientist has been trained to attach much importance to this, so I don't have a lot of respect for those who ignore it when they feel like it.

But like I said, there are religious scientists about (although comparatively few)...but since they offer no more evidence than Dora or Zing do, I shall not be taking much notice. Why should I? Evidence or it didn't happen, I'm afraid.

noblegiraffe · 05/08/2015 22:56

Clearly that wasn't the full conversation, Mehitabel. I know he has struggled to keep track of some stuff because last year he asked me if the Easter bunny was real and I said no, then thought "shit, is that a thing? Have I just pissed off a load of school mums if he goes around telling other kids that?" Then the other day he asked about the Easter Bunny again and I said "what do you think?" and he replied that he couldn't think how the eggs got hidden in the garden otherwise so it must be the Easter Bunny, especially as his aunt told him she had spotted some ears behind a bush.
I expect there will be some confusion over Jesus's status, especially give he has read some kiddie Norse and Greek myths so he is used to gods in stories. Also the whole man whose dad was God but who was also the same God himself thing is a bit weird.

noblegiraffe · 05/08/2015 23:00

So sorry about your friend, stitching and all the best to twunk's DS
Flowers

Mehitabel6 · 05/08/2015 23:00

I apologise- but online you go by what people write and I read it as being very dismissive and couldn't see why he couldn't keep track if you had lengthy conversations.

tarashill · 05/08/2015 23:01

I'm going to hide this thread now, I find it nasty and insulting. I understand that not everyone will believe in God, but there's no need to be so insulting to those that do. I suspect that many who are so vehement about it sub consciously do believe. I just wonder what it is that riles them so much. Hmm

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 05/08/2015 23:04

lemon

I'm getting bored of repeating that if you want evidence first before you believe it - well that is just not how it works.
Jesus himself could appear to you and tell you that God exists and that everything written in the Bible is true -yet you might reject that as evidence, if you have no faith.
you'd just explain it away as a hallucination

sorry, if someone want to "see" first they must believe

StitchingMoss · 05/08/2015 23:05

Thank you noble.

Trust me tarashill, I don't subconsciously believe at all. Not one thing I have ever seen or experienced in my life could lead me to the conclusion that god exists. Not one.

LemonCream · 05/08/2015 23:06

I suspect that many who are so vehement about it sub consciously do believe

Suspect whatever you like. You are wrong - not to mention spectacularly arrogant.

If you decide that's "nasty. tough. It's nowhere near as nasty as telling people that you know what they are really thinking. Get over yourself.

StitchingMoss · 05/08/2015 23:06

So Jesus only shows himself to believers Zing? What a fantastic get out of jail free card Hmm.

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 05/08/2015 23:07

tara
Matthew 7:6
Wink

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 05/08/2015 23:09

stitching

that's not what I said. don't twist my words

LemonCream · 05/08/2015 23:11

I'm getting bored of repeating that if you want evidence first before you believe it - well that is just not how it works

sorry, if someone want to "see" first they must believe

This is extraordinary.

So the only people who can see evidence of god already believe that he exists?

And, er, you sincerely cannot see the problem with this?

noblegiraffe · 05/08/2015 23:11

Telling atheists that they must secretly believe in God is such a cliché.

This thread has looked like "my first debate with atheists"

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 05/08/2015 23:13

nope.
if there was evidence for all to see there would be no need for faith

faith is trust

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 05/08/2015 23:16

and even if there was evidence for all to see some people would still choose to not believe

But I've already try to explain this.
clearly there's no point trying again

ciao, this has been fun

StitchingMoss · 05/08/2015 23:17

That's exactly what you said Zing - no word twisting at all!

"if someone wants to see first they must believe"

So I'll never have the evidence until I believe and I won't believe without evidence.

It's perfect. Hmm

noblegiraffe · 05/08/2015 23:18

You can have faith in someone and trust them and be sure they exist.

"Blessed are those who have not seen and yet believe" is a cop out when you are punished for not believing. Also Doubting Thomas got to put his fist in a flesh wound, so it's not really fair to only give the rest of us some dodgy old literature, is it? When it's a matter of heaven or hell...

LemonCream · 05/08/2015 23:21

Saying this as nicely as I can...Zing, I don't believe you actually understand the arguments that you attempt.

God puts thoughts in our heads and now you have to believe in God first before you can see the evidence for him.

If you already believe, why do you need evidence at that point anyway?

Honestly, what nonsense.

LemonCream · 05/08/2015 23:23

Why, by the way, doesn't god put the thought in our heads that he's real? He must be deliberately putting the thought in my head that he's not real.

Truly a wanker.

Thank fuck he doesn't exist.