To think my SIL over stepped the mark by assuming we'll be inviting her parents to our wedding?

[lalalemon]

We're getting married next September so ages away, but still feel she had no right to even ask let alone assume it will actually be happening!

She is DP's brothers girlfriend, we'd popped in to see MiL who they live with when she asked us if we'd be inviting her parents and six brothers to the wedding 'because you've not got much family have you?'

I've never met said parents/brothers, nor do I know their names! DP has met them for all of about 5 minutes! They are mighty fine chavs and live bloody miles away anyway!

Really put us on the spot, I just kind of went 'oh ermm, we've not decided who we're inviting yet' wish I'd said 'you're lucky your being invited you moron!

Obviously we won't be inviting the rest of her family!

I don't understand why people jump all over the word moron but not idiot - they were part of the same 'scale' back when moron was used as a diagnostic word. Now both words have evolved well beyond the original use of the words and come to mean 'general muppetry'.

And your SIL was unreasonable expecting invitations for her family but to be fair maybe she likes you more than you appear to like her!

yes, pray tell Mumsnetters - why is wanker ok but chav is not?
Judgemental lot aren't you?
OP, your wedding, feel free to exclude/invite as you see fit

God, people on here really love getting on their high horses when it suits them. And seriously, the word 'moron' has been debated at length on here? Just, wow.

As for the OP, yes it's very rude of the sil to assume her blooming family is invited. It's rude for anyone to assume an invite really. In future, just refer to sil and co as 'massive twats/cunts/wankers'. That sort of language is a-ok. Chav never is... For reasons....

Yanbu

As others have said, op, you should have described your SIL as a stupid cunt instead. That would have been totally fine.

Don't feel 'on the spot', you should've come straight out with 'no, of course we won't be inviting them - we don't know them and have never even met them - we're only inviting people we actually know'.

-She is not your sister in law

• you should have said you are only inviting people who are close friends and family, it was silly not to answer her clearly
• there are plenty people that think it is chav to have children before marriage , its a horrid word

Queen

Sorry folks, genuinely didn't realise I'd opened such a massive can of worms!

I obviously wasn't using that word in a disablist way and apologise if I offended anyone.

Still think the c word is far ruder and certainly won't be calling her or anybody that!

Probably should have been more upfront with my answer when she dared ask, but didn't want to upset her as she's been known to throw a tantrum and hold a grudge for weeks and I can't be dealing with it!

???????????? at Alisvolatpropiis

That was suppose to be smile face

Easier to type SIL than partners brothers girlfriend though!

What do those squares mean Croatia?

Next time it comes up op you have to tell her you haven't room to invite people you don't know.

Ok skipping the wording controversy, my Bil's parents came to my wedding but not his 4 siblings (who I knew reasonably well). My Dsis wasn't married to BIL at the time but they were engaged.

The 18 month earlier (before they were engaged) My parents and O were not invited to my Bil's brother's wedding.

This all seemed perfectly sensible to everyone involved.

On the basis that your brother girlfriend is a 'girlfriend' rather than long standing partner her parent's wouldn't rate an invite for me.

If she is a long standing partner (mother if his DCs etc) they would rate an invite but not if none of the family knew them. (They counted as my patent's guests not mine iyswim)

The 6 brother's would never rate and invite unless they were actually our friends separately from being sil's brothers.

However all that being said - it is never polite to ask for an invitation.

If asked again say 'numbers are very tight, family and friends come first'

Or simply 'no'.

X post, Croatia!

Soooo many typos ^^

OP I roared laughing at your opening post- very refreshing!

Well DP and his parents have met her parents a handful of times for minutes each time. Like I said they live a long way away. If they live nearby and we'd spent time with them, as the brother and girlfriend have with my parents, I'd probably invite them.

I love how cunt can be bandied around no problem but moron and chav can't be. I have no problem with either. Moron is like idiot and everyone I know uses it in this context. Chav means bloody rough where I am and everyone I know uses it in this context. It's only on here it seems to be a problem.

OP, YANBU. Tell her you aren't inviting people who are not family (or partner of family) or close friends. No need to explain further as it's an odd request for her to make anyway! Why would you invite your fiances brothers partners siblings and parents!

*Ah the MN professionally offended have come out in force.

Moron. Check the dictionary. Slang. A foolish or stupid person.

She was having a dig. Implying that you don't have anybody to invite = nobody likes you. Given your attitude I can understand why...

Invite them! Have a big fat chav wedding! A big fucking chavfest, they will be drinking lager, swearing and if you're lucky have a big chavvy kick off resulting in one of your five in chavvy guests being hospitalised after being punched in the eye by a chav oooh a happy chavvy wedding sounds marvellous can I come?

Oh you sound delightful. Moron and mighty chav? Aren't you polite.

Ref the phrase in the OPS post "they are mighty fine chavs"

Doesn't it take one to know one?