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AIBU?

Not feeding guests?

424 replies

ReginaFelangi · 02/08/2015 21:14

Just wondering if I ABU.

Some friends are throwing a party. It's a big anniversary at a village hall and has been organised for months. They have lots of friends going. Most are having to travel quite a long distance and have booked hotels at £60+ for the night.

A few weeks back guests were told no drinks would be provided. Now it's clear they're not providing any food either.

I'm not really sure what the point is anymore. I would never arrange a party with no food or drinks! Do you think this is unreasonable?

OP posts:
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knackered69 · 02/08/2015 21:48

can he impersonate a buffet? Grin sorry - that made me spit my lager out!

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NorksAreMessy · 02/08/2015 21:48

I want to go to lovelyspreads party. I like a good family do with pickled onions and a brown buffet

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NorksAreMessy · 02/08/2015 21:49

Could you make up sandwiches to SELL?
You would make the cost of the hotel :)

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BettyCatKitten · 02/08/2015 21:50

can he impersonate a buffett Grin
Your poor DH, sounds like they're going to be a tough crowd Hmm

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knackered69 · 02/08/2015 21:51

Ooh! Pickled onions cheese and pineapple on sticks! am salivating!

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OVienna · 02/08/2015 21:53

So your husband is effectively holding their whole evening together through his act?

Fuck I hope he's not impersonating Cameron. Austerity party, har.

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youarekiddingme · 02/08/2015 21:57

Austerity party Grin

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TheFormidableMrsC · 02/08/2015 21:59

I am at a loss to understand how they have been "organising this for months" when all they had to do was book the village hall. Organising what exactly?! That is not a party at all and they have a bloody cheek. No, YANBU...and I would not go, send DH, let him do his thing and then send them an invoice afterwards....

PS : Make sure he does a cracking impersonation of a bunch of tightwads.

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Only1scoop · 02/08/2015 22:01

Exactly what have they organised other than a hall....and your OH providing free laughs.

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NorksAreMessy · 02/08/2015 22:01

Shall we gatecrash?

I love the idea of a load of Mnetters arriving with gin, cake, rude shaped balloon animals and crocheted bunting and having our own party...to show how it's done.

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foreverton · 02/08/2015 22:02

What's the point of the sodding "party"? Never heard anything like it.

Oh just remembered my brothers wedding, small gathering, 20 odd ( quite literally in some cases!) People And we were each presented with a pre written bill for the wedding breakfast, down to the penny :)

I would ask dh to cancel and leave the tight buggers to it....crisps?!?!

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LaurieFairyCake · 02/08/2015 22:05

Careful, someone will be on in a minute saying 'are you saying Poor people shouldn't have parties then!' Hmm

That's not a party or if it is it's the worst party in the fucking universe.

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WallyBantersJunkBox · 02/08/2015 22:05

This has the potential to be like the wedding thread a while back, where everyone had to pay for their own dinner and when the delightful couple counted the wishing well money it wasn't enough for their new dream kitchen and they emailed everyone for more cash. GrinGrinGrin

Please please give us a post party update.

And of course everyone will go, and enjoy an evening moaning in solidarity and having a whip round for someone to hit the pub and local Budgens to get some stuff.

It's the British wartime spirit. Secretly we love it don't we? GrinGrinGrin

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FithColumnist · 02/08/2015 22:06

How many people are expected at this "party"? Have the organisers arranged sufficient personal security for when they inevitably get lynched by a mob of angry, hungry, alcohol-deprived guests?

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Madamacadamia · 02/08/2015 22:06

Have they even thought of how lots of people descending on a village are going to get fed otherwise?

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WallyBantersJunkBox · 02/08/2015 22:06

Maybe they own the local pub Madam WinkWinkWink

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Pico2 · 02/08/2015 22:07

It's bizarre. Not even to do a "please bring a dish" buffet - which is fine in some circumstances - is just odd. Even the most under catered event we've been to had food, though we still needed a McDonalds to get us through. It also depends on the people throwing the party. The under catered event we went to was held by minted people so it was either mean or thoughtless. But I've been to a city-centre wedding where the bride and groom couldn't afford to feed everyone so we were invited to the ceremony and evening party, leaving time for friends to go out for a meal. That was fine as we were expecting it, knew that they couldn't possibly afford to feed us all and we were somewhere sensible to have a meal out.

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ihateminecraft · 02/08/2015 22:08

Bring a bottle to a party is absolutely fine and actually preferred by many. But no food??? I was once an evening guest at a wedding which we'd travelled a considerable distance to attend. We naturally expected an evening buffet but not a sausage! The only "food" available at the bar was dry roasted peanuts (which I hate!). Fled to McDonald's in the end!

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MaryBerrysEyelashes · 02/08/2015 22:09

if you cant afford to host then dont have a big party.

REALLY

at least go to tesco and get £100 of wine or beer

get mates to bring a plate

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firesidechat · 02/08/2015 22:11

This can't be true. I've experienced bad food and rubbish drinks, but no one would think it acceptable to provide nothing at a party. Even the most socially inept person would know this.

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BigChocFrenzy · 02/08/2015 22:13

I have NEVER in rl come across a "party" where proper food and drink are not provided, but I'm 59 so maybe its a generational thing Confused Hmm ?
Especially as so many are paying petrol and hotels.

Among my friends & family, It would be a social faux pas that the "hosts" would never live down. Tightfisted and very inhospitable.

If your OH is providing the entertainment, I'd have expected them to provide your accommodation, as well as feeding and watering you.
They are ridiculously beyond cheeky.
Tell them his expenses will be £200-

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WixingMords · 02/08/2015 22:14

Weird. Just weird. I don't think I'd be impressed at travelling and paying for a hotel to sit around a hall (or stand as it's possible there's not going to be chairs provided) and watch your husband (not that I think he's rubbish but he's not the reason I made the effort iykwim!!)

I remember the other thread too, but I though she was planning on providing some food in the nibbly sense.

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Only1scoop · 02/08/2015 22:15

Hope the 'crisps' on offer will be hand picked kettle roasted humdingers of the finest quality ....

Not stale tangy toms and a few hools hoops.

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CrystalCove · 02/08/2015 22:16

Is there going to be any music???

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SweetAndFullOfGrace · 02/08/2015 22:17

No food??? I could understand "bring a bottle" (and be prepared to defend it if your tastes run to more than £5 from Tesco) but no food is just weird.

Why have a party full of hungry people? They'll just be grumpy.

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