To put newborn on formula?

[BumWad]

Just a bit of background. DS who is 6 weeks old arrived at 32 weeks, his due date will be this Sunday.
He was in SCBU for just over 4 weeks, has had no issues apart from working on the feeding. Apart from a bit of formula in the first few days before my milk came in he has has breastmilk and I have now been ebf for nearly 3 weeks.

It's not all rosy at all. He's got reflux so is not keeping a lot down, except as soon as he's sick he wants to feed again. I am utterly, utterly exhausted. He's putting weight on but the feeding every 1.5-2 hours is killing me. The actual 'feed' is ok however I have to burp him then keep him upright for 30 mins afterwards which then makes it time for the next week.

Alongside this he's on Ranitidine 3 times a day, dalivit once a day, iron once a day and folic acid once a week. He's been prescribed gaviscon too but vomits that up too! I administer all these via a syringe and it's really taking away the job from breastfeeding.

I have lots of breastmilk frozen as I was pumping round the clock when he was in SCBU but this will eventually run out. I just feel so guilty about giving him formula so soon. Another thing that is constantly on my mind is that breastfeeding reduces the SIDS risk, I've had a previous stillbirth so I'm on edge with that as it is.

I guess I don't know what I'm asking but I'm getting to the end of my tether here. Any advice/support would be appreciated. DH is going to try and give him breastmilk in a bottle tonight so will see how that goes. I've got a wrap but he's not big enough to go in it yet, I've ordered a swing got a bouncer etc.

Your baby, your choice. If it's right for you it's not unreasonable, sod what anyone else thinks.

For what it's worth, tiny babies do breastfeed every five seconds but it does get better. The older they get, the more spaced out the feeds. It's knackering but in the grand scheme of things, it's only for a short period of time.

I repeat though - your baby, your choice

I can honestly feel for you - so much. My DS was exactly the same. He was born at 42 weeks so not prem, but trying to bf nearly broke me.

He would basically feed for 40 minutes and then throw it all up with the reflux (all over me and the sofa, usually). Then he was hungry again. After two weeks or so of this, and the sleep deprivation, stitches and so forth, I was falling apart. I begged (now Ex) H to drive to Tesco for formula at 2 am. I just felt that I could not do it any more.

This was in 2003, and we didn't have the internet then, so if you can get some help and advice to continue bfeeding then that would probably be a good thing. I just want to say, though, that if you can't stand it any more then do not feel guilty!

It hasn't put me off trying to do it next time, if there is one, but now, at least, there is MN and stuff for advice and encouragement.

in answer to ihatemagic, I found ff my 1st born (4 weeks prem, at 4lb) WAY less stressful than breastfeeding my 2nd child. She should have been the easiest...dd1 was 5, a very good child, at school, so it shouldhave been a dream. It wasnt

duckydinosaur op outlines exactly why she is thinking of ff. stop with trying to guilt her

Sounds like you've have a rough time. You have to go with instinct, but if he is having trouble with breastmilk, I wouldn't rely on formula being any better. My SIL stopped feeding her daughter at 6 wks due to similar issues and found her daughter was allergic to formula and soy formula. She ended up on some revolting gunge until she could cope with cow's milk, and things still aren't right. Think very carefully, he is still very little and it will get easier - honest!

I can't comment on breast feeding as I fed both of mine formula from birth.

However, my son had silent reflux and it was awful, my health visitor recommended Cow and Gate instant Carobel and he was a different baby as soon as I started using it.

Maybe you could speak to your HV or GP about giving your baby this with feeds?

hi op. its up to you how you feed your baby :) my baby was not prem. hes 3 months old now he feeds about every 2 hours. he wakes 2-4 times a night. i (think) bf babys feed more often because it digest faster. not sure though? he also cluster feeds sometimes. im not stuck in the house though i feed when im out and about. if you (want) to carry on breast feeding then go for it. if you dont then defo do not feel guilty.weigh up pros and cons for you and baby

Ds was also a 32 weeker .I nearly killed myself feeding and expressing and eventually caved in after 6 weeks. Ds is 14 now and looking back I wish I'd put him on the bottle from day one. I wish someone had convinced me that this really wasn't the big deal I was making it out to be and there would be FAR more important things to stress about in the following years.

Thank you for all your replies.

To answer a few questions - DS doesn't tolerate the gaviscon mid way through a feed he just vomits it back out and sometimes he just won't take the gaviscon at all if I take him off the breast mid way and falls asleep.
To the person who asked about ranitidine, yes I administer it via syringe before feeds.
Also I know there is an infant feeding section but I knew I would get more traffic on here.

After feeling so down that day I managed quite a bit of sleep with DH bringing DS to me for feeds then just taking him away. I even managed a walk out with the pram the following day!

However his reflux seems to have got much worse. Last night he was vomiting through his nose, it just seems to pour out. I'm worried he's not going to gain weight which is so so important with him being a preemie.

We tried him on a bottle yesterday with expressed breastmilk, and he did so well, took it all!!! So we are going to give him gaviscon in the bottle as recommended, the only issue is I can't give gaviscon more than 6 times in 24 hours so it's about finding the balance.

I think we are going to go through the mix-feeding route once my expressed milk runs out. However I have considered expressing regularly to try and keep DS on breastmilk as long as possible. Has anybody else done this? Is it going to be extra work? The local children's centre have lent me a breast pump.

Thanks to the person who posted about the wraps - I have a moby wrap but i thought baby had to be 8lb to use it. Me and DH are going to attempt the kangaroo hold with it today, I'm sure that'll make a difference with keeping DS upright when we can't give him the gaviscon.

Well tbh you're going to need to express as your boobs will feel like they're going to explode otherwise. After I stopped BFing, I still had to express for 2 wks for comfort. You won't have any choice but to express, iykwim.

I actually found my handpump a lot quicker than my electric one. The electric one goes at its own pace, whereas I soon learnt I could go like the clappers with the hand one and I'd get the same amount in half the time. Also could throw it in my big handbag & do it sitting in a car park if needed!

Hi bumwad. Sorry to hear what a hard time you've been having, you sound as if you are doing amazingly well. I had prem twins who were ff through a NGT in NICU whilst I waited for my milk to come in then were breastfed for 8 weeks. They weren't putting on weight though and I was advised to give top ups of EBM in a bottle. After a few weeks of combination breast and bottle feeding EBM I decided to swap to exclusively pumping and bottle feeding. This was more to do with difficulty in positioning two to breast feed at once - it was much easier to bottle feed two at once in bouncy chairs.

But what I am trying to say is that (for me) it was possible to pump 4-6 times a day and get enough milk to bottle feed them. If they were particularly hungry or going through a growth spurt they had some formula too but they mostly had breast milk. I did this until they were 10 months - switching to pumping doesn't necessarily mean your supply will dry up as some people might lead you to believe.

I second the idea of having a hand pump as well as an electric. I used both depending on where I was and how I felt at the time. Sometimes it was easier with the hand pump although you can only do one boob at a time.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do. Only you can make the decision that is right for you and your family, based on your circumstances. I know it's hard not to, but try not to feel guilty about whatever you decide, you will do what is right for your baby.

Good to hear about the sling :) You can also feed in them but it's fiddly to do - if you have a sling consultant anywhere near you (they're normally on google, but also if you know anyone who has access to BF support groups get them on the grapevine) get them to show you. Other than that there are videos on youtube but it's harder to learn from a video.

I've just remembered another thing I read which was to express once a day and put 1oz each into six bottles (You could also use one carton of formula to do this) and put the gaviscon dose in there. Then you feed that before feeding properly from the breast.

Op it was very brave of you to post on aibu. You may not get the most balanced of replies here.

My first dd had very severe reflux, and I sympathise with you how difficult it is. For her it was eat, vomit, cry, then repeat, all day and night. She had colic too, which meant hours of inconsolable crying each night.

I echo what lots of other posters have said: formula feeding is very bad for reflux Bottle fed babies take in a lot more air than breastfed babies, formula is a lot harder to digest, and a lot more likely for the baby to be intolerant to. Becuase of the reflux you should carry o breastfeeding as much as possible.

To reassure you: once you start solids, the reflux becomes miles better.

Formula feeding is NOT very bad for reflux or anything like that. Bollocks!!

Reflux happens to both bf and ff babies due to a weakness of a stomach valve, which improves and then usually stops as the baby grows.

Do what suits you. Seriously. I remember The breast v formula question as being a huge deal. My youngest is now 13. I can look back now and wonder why on earth it was such an issue. Time gives you that perspective on it.

To reassure you: once you start solids, the reflux becomes miles better

Not necessarily. My DS had reflux until he was 2. Your experience is not 'fact'.

Haven't read the whole thread but..I intended to BF mine, until they came along and I experienced it. I was in absolute bits with the guilt of stopping, until I got a scare that my baby was poorly ( he wasn't, just got a fright about something) and it put in perspective that FF is still looking after your baby and there's nothing to feel guilty about

Good luck

Mind had reflux, I used the anti reflux formula and saw a huge improvement from normal formula

Formula will not help with reflux, it is likely to make it worse and the thicker formulas increase risks of SIDS (compared to regular formula which increases risks compared to BF). Premature babies are at higher risk of SIDS anyway. If there is already expressed milk and your partner is helping with feeds it is hard to see how formula would help give you any more rest too. It isn't like this forever with breastfeeding. You definitely will not be trapped at home for 8 months!

That said if you can't deal with the breastfeeding anymore then don't and step away from the guilt. Many things have risks, it is simply impossible to eradicate all risk.

I feel for you, you've been through a lot.

My ds is now 45 and was bf for the first couple of weeks only then severe mastitis made me switch to formula. Dd is 41 and was never bf at all asI still had various problems. Both were happy, healthy children and are happy, healthy adults. My cousin's dc are similar ages and were ebf for 6 months. They are also happy healthy adults though both had far more food fads than my two. Be happy and comfortable. Do not feel guilty about this ever.

Wow, some people are so dogmatic about bf vs ff that they are unable to accept any observations about differences between the two.

I made clear I am talking from my own experience, as have lots of other posters who experienced the same. Ff does make reflux a lot worse in the vast majority of cases. Yes I do know what reflux is. I experienced an extremely severe case.

topseye and vanilla I wonder if you have any actual experience of severe reflux? Or are you just wind up merchants? If you did, did you try boat bf and ff to know which one made the reflux better, in your experience?

To add, it is not just my experience that ff makes reflux far worse, but the numerous, very experienced paediatricians, who also all advised that ff does make reflux worse.