To put newborn on formula?

[BumWad]

Just a bit of background. DS who is 6 weeks old arrived at 32 weeks, his due date will be this Sunday.
He was in SCBU for just over 4 weeks, has had no issues apart from working on the feeding. Apart from a bit of formula in the first few days before my milk came in he has has breastmilk and I have now been ebf for nearly 3 weeks.

It's not all rosy at all. He's got reflux so is not keeping a lot down, except as soon as he's sick he wants to feed again. I am utterly, utterly exhausted. He's putting weight on but the feeding every 1.5-2 hours is killing me. The actual 'feed' is ok however I have to burp him then keep him upright for 30 mins afterwards which then makes it time for the next week.

Alongside this he's on Ranitidine 3 times a day, dalivit once a day, iron once a day and folic acid once a week. He's been prescribed gaviscon too but vomits that up too! I administer all these via a syringe and it's really taking away the job from breastfeeding.

I have lots of breastmilk frozen as I was pumping round the clock when he was in SCBU but this will eventually run out. I just feel so guilty about giving him formula so soon. Another thing that is constantly on my mind is that breastfeeding reduces the SIDS risk, I've had a previous stillbirth so I'm on edge with that as it is.

I guess I don't know what I'm asking but I'm getting to the end of my tether here. Any advice/support would be appreciated. DH is going to try and give him breastmilk in a bottle tonight so will see how that goes. I've got a wrap but he's not big enough to go in it yet, I've ordered a swing got a bouncer etc.

Do what is right for you and the baby. If FF works then do so without any guilt whatsoever. There is no shame with FF.

OP, AIBU maybe isn't the best place to ask for advice. Perhaps "infant feeding" might get you some more appropriate responses?

I'm a mother of 2 prems; my 29 weeker had terrible reflux which did not resolve until he was 3.5. It was beyond grim & unfortunately it was just part of his prematurity.

A few thoughts:

• referral to paediatric gastroenterologist for Omeprazole (my DS was on adult doses)
• recalculating medication doses with weight gain.

I'm not sure if changing to formula will help, or not.

But YANBU to try it.

And please remember you've been through an extremely traumatic time, NICU is a very tough call. It often catches up with you at home. I was traumatised. Above all, be kind to yourself xx

I think a well-rested, relaxed, happy mummy is at least as if not more important than breastfeeding and if you think switching to formula will better help provide that then it's absolutely the best thing to do for you.

Having said that, don't hang all your expectations on formula being a miracle cure for baby's reflux. I didn't get on with BF and switched to formula at 2 weeks. By 3 weeks DD was a colicky little banshee and as well as feeding I was having to add Colief to bottles and squirt in Infacol by syringe as well as faffing about with complicated anti-colic bottles. I think we briefly had Ranitidine (vile - she just refused to feed) and Gaviscon (constipation - looked like she was producing rabbit droppings) to no effect. Organic formula helped slightly but it wasn't until she started weaning that she settled. As bizarre as it sounds I don't think an all liquid diet agreed with her .

Sounds like mixed feeding might be good for you, or ploughing through the stash of frozen breast milk so other family members can help out and allow you to get some rest.

Whatever you decide you are perfectly within your rights to make the best decision for you and your family and do not have to justify it to anyone .

Ignore Ducky. they only seem to turn up to become Sanctimommy.

Formula is not poison. Not by a long shot. You need to do what is best for you and your family.

I would like to add that in my circle of mum friends (another poster made me think about this) a couple of the children who were/are breastfed are actually poorly more often than all of the other children in the group.

I mean at least every 4-6 weeks there is a sniffle or bug or a virus of some description. Formula fed children are as healthy and in some cases possibly healthier than those breastfed. That tells me that while breast milk is nutritionally superior to formula it isn't actually the be all and end all.

" Formula fed children are as healthy and in some cases possibly healthier than those breastfed. That tells me that while breast milk is nutritionally superior to formula it isn't actually the be all and end all."

Well actually it doesn't tell you anything much at all - the (small) advantages are statistical, so one or two sickly BF children/healthy FF children no more "prove" that BF isn't all it's cracked up to be than a BF child who is never sick "proves" that BF is an amazing health elixir.

I think the OP should do whatever suits her and her family but please don't haul out statistics abuse to reassure her in either direction. :)

Add message | Report | Message poster duckydinosaur Thu 09-Jul-15 16:44:55
YABU... Breastmilk is best for your tiny baby... why even consider a less optimal solution for your precious baby when you have no real need to.

OP please ignore this comment, it's most unhelpful in your situation. Ducky back off a vulnerable new mum, your lack of empathy or understanding is disgusting.

OP you feed your baby any way you have to. There's been a lot of good advice on the thread so far. Well, except for the obviously unnecessary comment above.

Gosh you've really had a tough old time, I'd think you were superhuman if you didn't feel like you couldn't keep going on at least one occasion!!!! especially after everything toe been through to get to thus point!!!
Please don't feel guilty for considering formula, reflux is just AWFUL.

Not rtft but Fwiw here's my tuppenth worth....

Pros and cons to each option really, like others have said formula may help give you a much needed break (you could mix feed it doesn't have to be the end of BF) however, breastmilk is recommended for refluxy babies even over specialist reflux (thick) formulas because it is degested much quicker and leaves the stomach much quicker. I'm afraid refluxy babies generally do better being fed little and often, so your hope of bigger feeds spread apart may not be the case on formula because bigger feeds are more likely just to make you DC vomit and or uncomfortable.... God it's shit isn't it?!

You've been dealt a crap hand I'm afraid, believe me I've been there. My DD us now 8 months old but suffered horrendously with silent reflux and cmpi...she didn't get better symptom wise until she was put onto omeprazole...perhaps you request a change from ranitidine to omeprazole as it only needs to be given once a day (DD was started on ranitidine initially, although it made her worse, she was only on it for 4 days but I remember feeling overwhelmed with how often I had to get it into her on top of everything else!! So you have my sympathy!)

Unfortunately babies with reflux will often comfort suck a lot because the milk soothes the burning in their throats...this is why omeprazole is helpful because it neutralises the stomach acid and stops the burn. The other thing of course is that your baby has not been feeding directly from you for that long, so still in the cluster feeding/establishing milk supply part of BF. It is shit and it is exhausting. But if you keep going (not saying you SHOULD, just that if you don't) then it WILL get easier after the initial 8 weeks or so, and so convenient for being out and about/soothing baby etc. I am glad I pushed through the hard, knackering shiteness and still bf my DD now at 8 months.

She still feeds every 2-3 hours but I can do it upside down and back to front so it's not issue going out and about even with her still feeding that frequently. Believe me I thought back before 3 months "how the hell will I ever leave the house?!" Like you it took all day to have a shower (if at all!) but once she started the omeprazole within 4-5 weeks things were SO much better. They generally turn a corner after about 3-4 months, having a baby us a huge shock to the system and most people spend the first few months in their pjs never leaving the house So certainly don't feel like that is any reflection on your mothering skills or something!

Feel free to look up my old threads as I posted similar to you, pondering switching to formula, asking for advice on my non sleeping, screaming, cluster feeding DD!! But I survived and came out the other side and you will too...whatever you decide, things WIlL get better!!!

Oh goodness, x posted with quite a few while I typed out my apostle

Ignore all those stupid comments about less optimal solutions! What a horrid thing to stay to a new mum, in the midst of sleep deprivation, hormones etc, not to mention having had a perm baby and previous loss!! Shocking!

the feeding every 1.5-2 hours is killing me and
I'm getting to the end of my tether here

These reasons, for me, would be good/valid/excellent/necessary reasons to switch to formula.

Obviously, it's a well known fact that breast milk is good/valid/excellent/necessary (though I don't believe it's 'necessary', rather I believe it's ideal) too. BUT you've given him some/many/much of the benefits of it already now.

I never breastfed, because I couldn't, so never had your dilemma. I just accepted that it was a shame but not the end of the world that my DD would never have breast milk. So in a way I had it much easier than if I'd had the opportunity to BF, because I never had to make that choice or feel any guilt. However, the experience of FF her was lovely.

Honestly, don't feel guilty. You're obviously an excellent mum coping with a small baby (hard in itself) who has reflux (very hard!). Look after yourself, and FF may help you to do this. Try to step away from the guilt. Huge numbers of babies are FF, they thrive, they are OK.

You need to do what you need to do to keep you and baby healthy and happy.

I wouldn't go cold turkey though - gradually introduce more formula feeds and your supply will drop in line. That way, it won't be impossible to go back if he does react badly to the change and it'll be gentler on your boobs and hormone surges.

Why is it that 'yes give your baby formula' is the only acceptable answer in these sorts of threads? Formula may make reflux worse, and the tiny prem baby is benefitting from the OPs antibodies. Obviously if ff is truly the right thing for her then she should embrace it, but let's not downplay the benefits of breastfeeding whilst singing ff'ings praises and neglecting to mention the hassle of introducing and making up bottles.

Nrft

But reflux is awful. I gave up bf much earlier than I wanted to because of it. I was really upset about it.

Im not hauling out 'statistics abuse'.

I am just pointing out that formula feeding doesn't mean you will have a less healthy child, as the OP is obviously worried about formula feeding having a negative impact on the health of her baby.

The baby is already introduced to bottles.

And if formula really was such a faff, nobody would do it. I have a Perfect Prep machine and making up a bottle takes 2 mins. I wash them all en masse in the evenings and if you have a bucket of Milton it really is a piece of piss.

So let's not overplay the supposed "hassle" either.

Also, this book is fab, despite the title is all about reflux, written by a consultant paediatric gastroenterologist who had a baby with reflux himself!! Can probably buy on iPad or kindle to read whilst feeding baby!!

www.amazon.co.uk/Colic-Solved-Essential-Infant-Difficult-/dp/0345490681/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1433792126&sr=8-1&keywords=Colic+solved&tag=mumsnet

Annarose - what you said!

Argh I'm going to throw this bloody iPad out the window In a Minute!!!!!!!

www.amazon.com/Colic-Solved-Essential-Infant-Difficult/dp/0345490681

I say the above as someone who seriously considered switching my screaming, feeds hourly or more, comfort suckling all evening baby to formula because I was on my knees with exhaustion, so I'm in no way judging the OP.

Do what you need to do. Do what feels right for you and your baby and do not feel guilty at all if you decide to give formula.

All of my three were formula fed right from the start, including DD3, who was born 5 weeks early and spent time in SCBU. No problems at all, and they are all now healthy and happy older girls of 20, 16 and 13.

Ignore the breastapo style nurses or midwives (not all of them are). Formula isn't poison. Use it if you want to.

A happy and more relaxed mother is far better than a totally exhausted and wiped out one.

You have nothing to feel guilty about op . You must be exhausted do what is best for you and your baby.

Having a newborn is hard work, you have my sympathy.

My son was born @ nearly 34 weeks via section. He also had silent reflux. I breastfed him no problems. I tried formula on the odd occasion - it wasn't the answer.

Ps after the two hourly feeds for about 6iah weeks (which could also happen with formula) he was going every four hours.

Gosh there is so much wrong with this post.